If I had the power to change things – UPDATED VERSION!

I did this post over nine years ago. Crazy, right? I went over some of the things I would do if I was put in control of college football. So maybe it’s about time to see how I did and then look at a few more things I would do. Let’s fucking go with this potential bullshit!

  1. In OT, they should start farther back than the 25-yard line. OK they still haven’t changed this and they have made it worse by going to the 2-point shootout after the second overtime period. That is so ridiculous. Either take out the gimmick (which reminds me of the penalty shootout at the end of regular season hockey games which also drives me nuts) or make it so teams can tie after two overtime periods like in the CFL. College football had the greatest overtime format and they have somehow been overtaken by the NFL who, for all the good they do with rule changes, spent years fucking up their overtime games and basically stumbled upon rules changes thanks to the Bills and…well, I don’t want to talk about it.
  2. Stop time after EVERY first down makes the game a little longer than most can handle. They listened! THEY LISTENED! Kind of. I had proposed doing it in the final five minutes of each half or even in the second and fourth quarter only. They do it all game now. Which is good? Problem is, some of that saved time has gone to more ad breaks. That is not so good. All in all, we will call this a push but it definitely leads into my next point that I had made…
  3. Three-hour TV windows are dumb. This is still the case. And it’s done even more than it was back then. ESPN does it a few times a year with their evening games by pushing them to 6:00 and 9:00 so that the late SEC game isn’t TOO late. Now the ACC Network also does this one week, usually Week 2. They have so many games for their teams that they have to do this. At least they are smart enough to start at 11:00 and this past season, moved to three hour, fifteen minute windows for some of the games. That’s a perfect compromise. Expect other conference networks to potentially try this with conferences becoming bloated.
  4. Can we stop with the games against FCS schools outside of the first month? No, it seems like they can’t. The SEC has dialed it back a bit. Only about half their teams (if that) play those games during the penultimate weekend of the regular season. But now we have the ACC doing it now. Stop it. Please. Play them in October. November should be for the biggest games, not Western Illinois (no offense to the Leathernecks) going to Georgia to get their asses handed to them for three-quarters of a mil.
  5. Start Division 4 right now. I think I need to tweak this idea since a fuck-ton of realignment has happened in nine years. I am going to change this into football becoming its own special college sport and not totally following conference alignments in the rest of the sports. Don’t get me wrong, some of the realignments have been good but many have been weird, head-scratching, money-hungry or just plain dumb. So let football have their own conference alignments and allow the rest of the sports to go back to having the Southwest Conference or the Metro Conference or maybe other, better, more geographically sensible conferences since even in basketball, going halfway across the United States for a Tuesday night conference game is beyond ridiculous.
  6. Is it time about time that CIS teams move south so to speak? At the time, I used Simon Fraser being in D-II as a starting point. Now, SFU doesn’t even have a football team thanks to their athletic department being a complete dumpster fire (not to mention much of the administration). Rogers still has their NHL contract for another few years (and there seems to be a bit of regret on their end which I mentioned would happen) so any CIS football, especially OUA, won’t be shown on their network any time soon. Maybe TSN can step up a bit with TSN+. Putting even one game a week (to start) on the streaming platform would be a good beginning to get eyeballs back on university football in this country. So, do I still think CIS teams should join the NCAA? Not nearly as much as I used to but some programs (I’m looking at you, York) need to seriously think about whether continuing having a football program is worth it.
  7. Let us all be able to get the ESPNs, FOX Sports 1, etc. Yeah not even close. The amount of games available to us up here is still the same, if not a bit less now. Peacock has joined the fray and we cannot get those games up here. Still can’t get any of the FOX, FS1 or, now, FS2 games up here in Canada. I’ve always said (and I will continue to say it) that the death of cable (which still will happen regardless of all these streaming services teaming up in a way) will partially come down to not giving the customers what they want to see, especially if they are willing to pay for it. I had mentioned years ago that I would pay a few hundred bucks a season if I could have access to have every FBS game on TV. Every one. I don’t care about news or movies or TV shows or much else. Those I can watch when I want on Netflix or Hulu or Amazon Prime or some other streaming service if I really want to. But college football is the one thing I would want all of and should have the ability to get but I have the god damn audacity to be Canadian. What a dick I am. So yeah, this should still happen.
  8. Do not put out the CFP poll until the bowl games are being selected. Because The Committee is filled with people who know college football but struggle with logic, you get situations like you got this past season. It easily (and I mean FUCKING EASILY) could have been rectified if when they had dropped Florida State to #5 after Week 13, they kept them there after Week 14, even though they knew one of Michigan and Ohio State was going to lose. Sure it wouldn’t have been that well received but then they wouldn’t have looked like complete assholes when they dropped them in the final poll to destroy their national championship hopes. If they wait until just as the bowl games and playoff seedings are being selected, then there’s not nearly as much of a problem. Debate all you want but at least you don’t compare it to previous weeks’ polls which make The Committee look like fucking idiots.

Alright, that was the list nine long years ago. I was in my 30s. And, looking at my body, a lot fitter. I hate the fact that injuries can happen due to nothing but air and movement these days. Other than what I see in the mirror, a lot has changed in college football as well since then. So I guess I have to come up with a few more things I would change. Here we go.

  1. Someone other than the NCAA has to put forth strict NIL rules and regulations. This feels like a no-brainer. When NIL started, it was great. Great stories of these players getting some nice deals and some players even sharing the wealth with their teammates. Awesome. Then, to the shock of absolutely no one, things got out of hand. Quickly. Now players are making hundreds of thousands of dollars (which is fine) but it has nothing to do with their name, image or likeness. All it has to do with a booster (or group of boosters) ponying up a bunch of money to buy a player’s loyalty (for at least a year). Isn’t this the same kind of shit SMU got the death penalty for? There has to be rules to all this and keeping boosters out of the player payment business would be first and foremost on that agenda. Start there, draft something up, tell all the teams they will abide by it or there will be penalties. Keep going against the rules, you will give up the one thing they all covet: money. If a program is fined millions of dollars, they will think twice of allowing some of these boosters, who think they can do whatever the fuck they feel like, from digging their claws into some of their roster.
  2. Football players (if not players in other sports) should be able to drop down to a part-time course load during the season. Playing college sports is not easy. You have to organize your time. I remember when I was a university athlete. I couldn’t get things right. I found it too difficult to commit to a sport AND a full-time course load. I am sure other athletes feel the same way. And the way college athletics are going, these students don’t need to finish their degrees before they leave school. They should be able to finish when they can. This may also push some student-athletes to be in more difficult programs. I mean there can only be so many communications jobs out there, right?
  3. Targeting HAS to be figured out. Does anyone really know what targeting is? Hell, the officials struggle to figure it out so I am not surprised everyone else is perplexed by it. Most of it seems to centre around hitting a player with the crown of your helmet. And yes, it’s dangerous. I still remember getting speared in practice in high school by a guy who had never been on special teams before. It knocked the wind out me something fierce. It’s a player safety issue and has to be taken seriously. Splitting the penalty into Targeting 1 and Targeting 2 penalties is a good start in my opinion. Targeting 2 can be reserved for the egregious penalties where the player deserves to be ejected. And hell, throw a 20-yard penalty on to it instead of a 15. Hopefully that helps a bit. Targeting 1 can still be 15 yards but the player stays in the game. The coaches and players may understand this better and we can see how it goes for a few years before looking into it again and adjusting it where need be.
  4. If there are going to be more superconferences (and less conferences in FBS in general) it’s time all conferences go to nine conference games. A few years back I would have railed against this idea but I didn’t realize that conferences might hit the 20-team mark in the next few years. Give it a decade and there is no way there will be nine conferences like there are now. At least one, if not multiple, conferences will cease to exist. With upwards of 18 teams at this point, putting an extra conference game makes all the sense in the world. Many Power Five teams can still have their one FCS non-conference game (which gives some FCS teams a much needed infusion of cash), along with a Group of Five non-conference game. Add a P5 non-conference game and there you go. See how easy that is? Do I have to figure everything out for you guys?

Are there other things needed to “fix” college football? Of course. It feels like college football is barreling down (in one of those Japanese bullet trains) towards no return. Where it will look not a whole lot different than the minor league of the NFL. It kind of is already but in 2030 I have a feeling we will look at even just before COVID and say “college football wasn’t like that, was it?”

The combine is occurring and I am glad to see some players saying “Fuck that noise.” If scouts can’t figure things out from the absolute avalanche of game film on these guys then they should find another line of work. No, instead we have to do drills that, as much as some want to say otherwise, don’t mean a whole lot compared to how they play the game. Tom fucking Brady just ran the 40 faster at 46 years old than he did when he was at the Combine. If that doesn’t tell you that the Combine is just basically Scouting Bonerfest, I don’t know what will.

Anyway, the UFL is coming up at the end of the month and I am less than mildly interested. I’ll watch but I won’t be really watching. Now, this European League of Football…if I could get that it would be interesting. It looks like if you had MACtion in Germany. I love it. Anyway, everyone have a great week.

Yeah let’s do another absurd Poll n’ Bowl

Wrong pole but I like your style. I hope you celebrated Festivus with a good long Airing of Grievances. And you better not have forgotten the Feats of Strength.

I have done this particular exercise a couple times before. So I guess this Version 3.00. Again, I am going to take this back to a time in college football when conference championships didn’t exist, realignment wasn’t even part of the sport’s lexicon and players only made money from secretive boosters giving them money in briefcases in remote airport parking lots (or something of that nature).

Rules of Bossman’s Poll n’ Bowl (or Bowl n’ Powl if you like that better):

  • Back then, approximately a third of teams made it to bowl games. That’s it. Not half. So bowl eligibility is set at 8 wins and there are 23 games. Will they be the same games as last year? Most of them will be but I have thought of perhaps a few changes.
  • ESPN won’t be getting close to all the bowl games. Hell, they may be lucky to get half. Look, it has to be like the 80s here.
  • Have to use the old sponsors. But if I can’t I will make substitutions that make sense. It would be like replacing McDonalds with Burger King. Can’t have a Crypto.com Rose Bowl when you are trying to emulate 1980s college football because “What the fuck is a crypto?” would be the question everyone would ask me.
  • Bowl tie-ins will be drastically different than they are now but I am going to try and get them close to the way they were.
  • I am doing the Plus-One. This is what should have been done long ago and it would have changed a fair amount of the past four decades, at least in terms of how the national champion is decided. So split championships can fuck off.

The time for explaining is over. The time for me….showing you what this is about is here. I guess. Alright let’s begin.

January 8th8:00National ChampionshipESPN#1#2
January 1st8:45Nokia Sugar BowlABCSEC Champat-large
January 1st5:00Rose Bowl presented by CitiABCBig Ten ChampSEC
January 1st1:00Discover Orange BowlNBCACC Champat-large
December 30th10:30Thrifty Car Rental Holiday BowlESPNBig Tenat-large
December 30th7:00Vizio Fiesta BowlNBCat-largeat-large
December 30th3:30Southwestern Bell Cotton BowlABCBig XII Champat-large
December 30thNoonChick-fil-A Peach BowlESPNACCat-large
December 29th8:00AXA Liberty BowlFOXAAC Champat-large
December 29th4:30Toyota Gator BowlNBCSECBig Ten
December 29th1:00John Hancock Sun BowlCBSBig XIIat-large
December 27th10:30Sega Las Vegas BowlESPNBig XIIat-large
December 27th7:00Capital One Citrus BowlABCACCat-large
December 26th9:30Domino’s Pizza Copper BowlESPNMWC Champat-large
December 25th3:30Jeep Aloha BowlABCMWCat-large
December 23rd10:00California Pizza Kitchen Freedom BowlESPNat-largeat-large
December 23rd3:30APS Payroll Independence BowlESPNSun Belt Champat-large
December 22nd8:00Phillips 66 Bluebonnet BowlABCAACat-large
December 20th8:30Regions Financial All-American BowlESPNC-USA Champat-large
December 19th7:00Burlington Coat Factory Garden State BowlESPNat-largeat-large
December 16th10:30Jack in the Box California BowlESPNat-largeat-large
December 16th7:00Outback BowlNBCSECat-large
December 16th3:30General Motors Cherry BowlFOXMAC ChampBig Ten
December 16thNoonMazda Tangerine BowlCBSat-largeat-large

Yeah this doesn’t look like what Bowl Season looks like now. Let’s get to some notes about the structure so far:

  • A ton of at-large bids. This is good since it allows bowl game committees to better choose teams they want to see.
  • More networks are involved and ESPN doesn’t have nearly as many games. I also threw a couple of games over to FOX even though they were barely a thing in the 80s.
  • Some of the sponsors were changed from the last time around because some bowls have had many sponsors. The Rose Bowl is now presented by Citi. The Las Vegas Bowl is brought to you by Sega. And the Tangerine Bowl is back to its original name and one if its early sponsors in Mazda.
  • Now some of the sponsors had to be just picked. I tried to be local with many of them. That’s why you see Regions Financial for the All-American Bowl (in Birmingham) and General Motors for the Cherry Bowl which is in Detroit.
  • Just like my Postseason Fix blog post, I have removed the Pac-12 from this. Have to move forward, ya know? Even if it is painful.

Just like last time I will tier the bowl games as follows:

  • Tier 1 – Current New Year’s Six bowls
  • Tier 2 – Post-Christmas Bowls
  • Tier 3 – Pre-Christmas Bowls

So the Tier 1 bowls will pick their at-large teams first, followed by the Tier 2 bowls, then finally the Tier 3 bowls. Within each tier, the order is random. Before we get to that, let’s see what the Tier 1 bowls look like with the tie-ins slotted in to their proper bowl games (remember, we are using next year’s conference alignment so, because Texas would be the highest ranked team, they are considered the “champ” of the SEC in this exercise…I am sure some SEC fans will bristle at this and frankly, I don’t give two squirts of shit about what you think about it).

Nokia Sugar BowlSEC Champat-large#3 Texas
Rose Bowl presented by CitiBig Ten Champat-large#1 Michigan
Discover Orange BowlACC ChampSEC#5 Florida State#4 Alabama
Vizio Fiesta Bowlat-largeat-large
Southwestern Bell Cotton BowlBig XII Champat-large#14 Arizona
Chick-fil-A Peach BowlACCat-large#15 Louisville

Good ol’ random drawing determines the order of selection. The Orange Bowl doesn’t even have to show up the lucky guys.

  • Rose – Georgia
  • Cotton – Washington
  • Fiesta – Oregon
  • Sugar – Ohio State
  • Peach – Penn State
  • Fiesta – Missouri

The Tier 1/New Year’s Six bowl games have been selected!

Nokia Sugar BowlSEC Champat-large#3 Texas#7 Ohio State
Rose Bowl presented by CitiBig Ten Champat-large#1 Michigan#6 Georgia
Discover Orange BowlACC ChampSEC#5 Florida State#4 Alabama
Vizio Fiesta Bowlat-largeat-large#8 Oregon#9 Missouri
Southwestern Bell Cotton BowlBig XII Champat-large#14 Arizona#2 Washington
Chick-fil-A Peach BowlACCat-large#15 Louisville#10 Penn State

What does this mean? Well, if you aren’t familiar with Poll n’ Bowl, there would be another set of rankings after these games were over to determine the two teams that would play for the national championship. Looking at this, four of the six games would be important in figuring this out with only the Fiesta and Peach Bowls not involved in painting the championship picture.

Now on to the next bowl tier. This is the post-Christmas bowl list. It does not include the Aloha Bowl which is on Christmas Day as it should be (and used to be).

Thrifty Car Rental Holiday BowlBig Tenat-large#17 Iowa
AXA Liberty BowlAAC Champat-large#24 SMU
Toyota Gator BowlSECBig Ten#11 Ole Miss
John Hancock Sun BowlBig XIIat-large#20 Oklahoma State
Sega Las Vegas BowlBig XIIat-large#25 Kansas State
Capital One Citrus BowlACCat-large#18 NC State
Domino’s Pizza Copper BowlMWC Champat-largeBoise State

Two things here. Boise State, even though they went 7-5, got their eighth win in the conference championship and, therefore, qualifies under my bowl system. The Gator Bowl is supposed to have a Big Ten team but after Iowa was slotted into the Holiday Bowl, the Big Ten had no other 8-win teams. Yikes. So that becomes an at-large. Now we will go the LIVE selection of the Tier 2 Bowl Games, sponsored by Taco Bell. Live Mas and avoid the Diarrhea.

  • Citrus – LSU
  • Las Vegas – Notre Dame
  • Holiday – Oklahoma
  • Copper – Oregon State
  • Sun – Tennessee
  • Gator – Clemson
  • Liberty – James Madison

Alright here are the matchups!

Thrifty Car Rental Holiday BowlBig Tenat-large#17 Iowa#12 Oklahoma
AXA Liberty BowlAAC Champat-large#24 SMUJames Madison
Toyota Gator BowlSECBig Ten#11 Ole Miss#22 Clemson
John Hancock Sun BowlBig XIIat-large#20 Oklahoma State#21 Tennessee
Sega Las Vegas BowlBig XIIat-large#25 Kansas State#16 Notre Dame
Capital One Citrus BowlACCat-large#18 NC State#13 LSU
Domino’s Pizza Copper BowlMWC Champat-largeBoise State#19 Oregon State

Some really good matchups here including KSU-ND and NCST-LSU. The Liberty Bowl would have had an opportunity to pick Liberty and I think they would choose James Madison instead.

Third tier time! According to the rules (my rules), the eight-win teams must be selected first. Then we go to those filthy seven-win teams. Ugh. Here is what we are looking at going into this final random draw:

Jeep Aloha BowlMWCat-largeUNLV
California Pizza Kitchen Freedom Bowlat-largeat-large
APS Payroll Independence BowlSun Belt Champat-largeTroy
Phillips 66 Bluebonnet BowlAACat-largeTulane
Regions Financial All-American BowlC-USA Champat-large#23 Liberty
Burlington Coat Factory Garden State Bowlat-largeat-large
Jack in the Box California Bowlat-largeat-large
Outback BowlSECat-large
General Motors Cherry BowlMAC ChampBig TenMiami-OH
Mazda Tangerine Bowlat-largeat-large

The Big Ten, yet again doesn’t have a team to fill a tie-in. Same with the SEC in this case as they don’t have another eight-win team to go to the Outback Bowl. Which leads us to the final draw of teams, the one that many will watch because this will be the difference between being bowl-eligible and being home for the holidays. We start with the draw of eight win teams remaining:

  • Freedom – Utah
  • Aloha – North Carolina
  • California – Fresno State
  • Tangerine – West Virginia
  • Freedom – UTSA
  • Outback – Kansas
  • California – New Mexico State
  • Outback – Memphis
  • All-American – Appalachian State
  • Bluebonnet – Air Force
  • Tangerine – Jacksonville State
  • Garden State – Toledo
  • Cherry – Ohio
  • Garden State – Wyoming

One measly bowl slot left. So the Garden State Bowl kind of gets hosed because they are forced to pick Wyoming instead of any of the seven-win teams. Thems the breaks and the EXCITEMENT of the Bossman Poll n’ Bowl System. Which bowl is left? The Independence Bowl sponsored by Shreveport’s own APS Payroll, of course! And who will they choose? Hmmm…I think if Caleb Williams had been playing it would have been USC but I have a feeling they will go with Texas A&M instead.

Complete Poll n’ Bowl schedule here we go!

January 8th8:00National ChampionshipESPN#1#2
January 1st8:45Nokia Sugar BowlABC#3 Texas#7 Ohio State
January 1st5:00Rose Bowl presented by CitiABC#1 Michigan#6 Georgia
January 1st1:00Discover Orange BowlNBC#5 Florida State#4 Alabama
December 30th10:30Thrifty Car Rental Holiday BowlESPN#17 Iowa#12 Oklahoma
December 30th7:00Vizio Fiesta BowlNBC#8 Oregon#9 Missouri
December 30th3:30Southwestern Bell Cotton BowlABC#14 Arizona#2 Washington
December 30thNoonChick-fil-A Peach BowlESPN#15 Louisville#10 Penn State
December 29th8:00AXA Liberty BowlFOX#24 SMUJames Madison
December 29th4:30Toyota Gator BowlNBC#11 Ole Miss#22 Clemson
December 29th1:00John Hancock Sun BowlCBS#20 Oklahoma State#21 Tennessee
December 27th10:30Sega Las Vegas BowlESPN#25 Kansas State#16 Notre Dame
December 27th7:00Capital One Citrus BowlABC#18 NC State#13 LSU
December 26th9:30Domino’s Pizza Copper BowlESPNBoise State#19 Oregon State
December 25th3:30Jeep Aloha BowlABCUNLVNorth Carolina
December 23rd10:00California Pizza Kitchen Freedom BowlESPNUtahUTSA
December 23rd3:30APS Payroll Independence BowlESPNTroyTexas Tech
December 22nd8:00Phillips 66 Bluebonnet BowlABCTulaneAir Force
December 20th8:30Regions Financial All-American BowlESPN#23 LibertyAppalachian State
December 19th7:00Burlington Coat Factory Garden State BowlESPNToledoWyoming
December 16th10:30Jack in the Box California BowlESPNFresno StateNew Mexico State
December 16th7:00Outback BowlNBCKansasMemphis
December 16th3:30General Motors Cherry BowlFOXMiami-OHOhio
December 16thNoonMazda Tangerine BowlCBSWest VirginiaJacksonville State

As I ask every year, how do we figure out who plays in the national championship game? Here are the different scenarios:

  • Michigan is in if they win the Rose Bowl
  • Washington is in if they win the Cotton Bowl AND Texas doesn’t beat Ohio State by too much
  • Texas is in if they win by a lot over Ohio State AND either Michigan loses OR Washington loses OR Washington wins but by very little
  • Alabama or Florida State are in if they win AND two of Michigan, Washington or Texas lose
  • Georgia is in if they win AND Washington loses AND Texas loses

Could Ohio State get in? Unlikely but remember, it comes down to voters and some of them like to think of what just happened because they have CFADD (College Football Attention Deficit Disorder). The Buckeyes would have to wallop Texas, hope FSU-Bama is close, have Georgia beat Michigan but by not too much and Washington has to lose to Arizona. Possible? Sure. But I doubt it.

So is this better or worse than the current setup? Who really knows. College football is a bit of a mess and no one wants to agree on anything. Now we have Florida State openly getting ready to leave the ACC and I don’t blame them. How dare they not be like Vanderbilt and just fucking show up and be shitty at the number one money sport but be in one of the top two conferences in that sport? The audacity. I mean the whole idea of the Big Ten and the SEC having the majority of the best college football teams would hold water if Vandy, Rutgers, Indiana, Mississippi State and a few others didn’t exist. They should have just broke up football into their own special thing and left the conferences the way they were for the rest of the sports. Or….promotion and relegation. I think I might do that exercise soon and ho boy it is going to rattle some chains I’m sure (if the right people read it).

Post-Christmas Bowl Season is about to start so things are getting a bit more important in the college football world. Plus, this is the final dash to the end with a lot of college football on so watch as much as you can, fill up that PVR if you have to and enjoy the games everyone!

Bowl Games? Yep. New Year’s Six? Sure. College Football Playoff? Uh-huh. Coaching Hot Seat List? Why not? My Heisman Ballot? I mean, if you have to…

Hey remember last year when I dumped all that stuff I mentioned above into one post? Guess what I’m doing again.

Look, you could say that it would take the same amount of time to put all this in separate posts. And you’d be wrong. These tags don’t just create themselves. Although if there is a way to do tags automatically I would feel like a big fucking moron. Oh well, I’m just going to keep on living thinking I have to type in all the pertinent tags to this post. Ignorance is bliss!

Let’s start with some postseason predictions. You read the two posts where I predicted the standings for all the conferences (and those four mangy Independents). At least I hope you did. If not, you might want to so it can prepare you for this because, ho boy, this could cause some people to think twice about my mental capacity. We begin with the top of the mountain, the College Football Playoff. Here is what I think the semi-finals will look like along with the rankings of the teams involved:

January 1st Sugar Bowl #1 Georgia #4 Florida State
January 1st Rose Bowl #2 Michigan #3 Alabama

Am I close to the experts’ picks? I don’t really know. I think Georgia is the easiest call here but the road to get there isn’t easy. Their regular season loss to Tennessee means they had to beat Alabama in the SEC Championship to be in the Top 4. I believe they do. I also believe Bama, being #1 going into conference championship weekend, wouldn’t fall four spots on a single loss to one of the best teams in the nation. So they stay in at #3 which I am sure will cause a ton of people to become irrational and use Twitter as a ridiculous sounding board and causing people to not want to talk about college football. Sorry…use X as a ridiculous sounding board and cause people to not want to talk about college football on social media. X. What a dumb fucking name. Anyway, Michigan should get in with a in in the Big Ten Championship, even if it is over a Minnesota team that would be near the bottom of the Top 25 going in. Finally, remember what I said about the Tide? Triple that hatred for this one. Florida State, I predict, will beat Clemson for the ACC title. The Tigers would come in to the game at #2 and FSU would be #5. I have the Noles moving up a spot and the Tigers being that one-loss team that loses out in this bunch. The amount of venom spewed by college football media and fans about this, rightly or wrongly, would be way over the top. I think it would be the first time (and would be the only time) that a team goes into conference championship weekend undefeated, loses, and tumbles out of the College Football Playoff when the smoke clears. And because of that, I hope this, or something like this happens because we need a ton of chaos for the final four-team CFP ever.

Now we go to the next tier down: the New Year’s Six. The final New Year’s Six. I would shed a tear but it feels like it’s hardly been around long enough:

January 1st Fiesta Bowl #9 USC #11 Ohio State
December 30th Orange Bowl #5 Clemson #7 Tennessee
December 30th Peach Bowl #8 Penn State #10 Notre Dame
December 29th Cotton Bowl #6 Texas #14 UTSA

Do the games look interesting? Absolutely. Could there be some debate as to who is here, who isn’t and where everyone should go (and how they get there)? Absolutely. Am I backing down from these predictions? Absolutely not. I mean if this was the 12-team playoff, I am sure people would debate that as well but you can’t tell me none of these teams would be worthy of being there. That’s crazy. “Durr, Texas doesn’t deserve to be there. They won’t even be bowl-eligible.” Yeah go fuck yourself if you think that. That’s just plain dumb.

Alright, enough anger, more analysis. Let’s start with Clemson since that’s the easiest one to explain. They were #2 and undefeated, lost to Florida State in the ACC Championship, so they get the Orange Bowl spot reserved for the top ACC team remaining. Simple. The Pac-12, in their final unglorious season, will again beat each other up making it impossible for one team to come out unscathed. So the ninth-ranked Trojans will head to the Fiesta Bowl after winning the Pac-12 title. Ohio State slots in as their opponent although it could easily be Penn State. The reasoning here is that tOSU already plays Notre Dame during the season and it makes more sense for USC to play in Phoenix than Penn State for bowl season. Those Longhorns I mentioned? They go off into the sunset, leaving the Big XII as conference champions. It puts them in the Cotton Bowl against the best Group of Five team. I think Tulane almost runs the table during the regular season and gets a pretty healthy lead in the rankings over the next best teams, UTSA and Boise State. The Roadrunners’ win in the AAC Championship would trump anything the Broncos do and, should be enough to leapfrog the Green Wave to sneak into the final NY6 spot. Let’s be honest here: Texas-UTSA at AT&T Stadium for the Cotton Bowl is an instant sellout, no doubt about it.

Now for the rest of the bowl extravaganza:

January 1st Citrus Bowl #12 LSU Minnesota
January 1st ReliaQuest Bowl #20 South Carolina Michigan State
December 30th Arizona Bowl San Diego State Toledo
December 30th Music City Bowl Ole Miss #17 Iowa
December 29th Liberty Bowl Texas A&M #16 TCU
December 29th Sun Bowl Duke #24 Utah
December 29th Gator Bowl Kentucky #21 North Carolina
December 28th Alamo Bowl #19 Kansas State #18 Oregon
December 28th Pop Tarts Bowl Pittsburgh Oklahoma
December 28th Pinstripe Bowl Maryland Louisville
December 28th Fenway Bowl Syracuse FAU
December 27th Texas Bowl Arkansas Baylor
December 27th Holiday Bowl Miami #13 Oregon State
December 27th Duke’s Mayo Bowl Wake Forest Auburn
December 27th Military Bowl NC State #15 Tulane
December 26th Guaranteed Rate Bowl San Jose State Oklahoma State
December 26th First Responder Bowl UCF East Carolina
December 26th Quick Lane Bowl Illinois Ohio
December 23rd Hawaii Bowl SMU Fresno State
December 23rd Las Vegas Bowl #23 Wisconsin Washington State
December 23rd 68 Ventures Bowl South Alabama Middle Tennessee
December 23rd Idaho Potato Bowl Air Force Miami-OH
December 23rd Armed Forces Bowl Kansas UTEP
December 23rd Birmingham Bowl Mississippi State North Texas
December 23rd Camellia Bowl Appalachian State New Mexico State
December 22nd Gasparilla Bowl UCLA James Madison
December 21st Boca Raton Bowl Coastal Carolina UConn
December 19th Frisco Bowl Marshall Navy
December 18th Myrtle Beach Bowl Southern Miss Buffalo
December 16th Independence Bowl Texas Tech Memphis
December 16th LA Bowl #22 Washington #25 Boise State
December 16th New Mexico Bowl Wyoming Louisiana
December 16th Cure Bowl Army Georgia Southern
December 16th New Orleans Bowl Troy WKU
December 16th Bahamas Bowl Eastern Michigan Liberty

That is a lot of bowl games. I am not complaining. I am fully embracing the Sickos mentality of all football is good football. Even arena football if you can believe it! And why am I not complaining? Because I am desperate for the season to start. Talk to me in mid-December and I may have a slightly different answer. Some notes on these bowl games:

  • The teams that juuuuuuust missed out on the New Year’s Six train to nowhere include LSU, Oregon State, Tulane and TCU.
  • Quite a few teams would be playing close to home, including Mississippi State travelling to relatively close by Birmingham, Air Force with a not-so-long drive north into Idaho, South Alabama playing exactly 0 kilometres from their home stadium in the renamed 68 Ventures Bowl, Ohio venturing into hostile territory to play in the Quick Lane Bowl and Wake Forest making their way to hopefully get their coach dumped with mayo in the Duke’s Mayo Bowl.
  • Hey remember what I said two posts ago about James Madison and a surprise for their fans? I know that was a lot of reading ago. Look, there won’t be enough teams to satisfy all the bowl slots. I have a feeling that will be a trend going forward. And because of that, the Dukes will have the opportunity to go to a bowl if they are invited before the team with the best APR score. And I’m sure at least one bowl would do that since JMU should be good once again this season. Man, do I ever hate the transition rule. I get the first year coming up that you shouldn’t qualify for anything. Get your feet wet. Sure. Longer than that is just the NCAA being insufferable dicks and not updating policies that are over 50 years old.
  • As for those 5-7 teams making bowls they would be Georgia Southern, Buffalo, and Navy (which would kill my scenario for the Army-Navy Game).

I guess I should mention who I think will win the whole thing. Well, I’ve got Georgia beating Florida State and Michigan beating Bama in the semis and then the Wolverines ending the three-peat talk by beating the Dawgs in Houston for the title. Then Khaki Jim can ride off into the sunset…that sunset being back to the NFL.

Well look who is back in the FBS. Rich God Damn Rodriguez! He is at the helm of one of FBS’s newest teams, the Jacksonville State Gamecocks. I’m sure it won’t be an amazing season for the team but man, who thought he would be back at the top level of college football? Probably a few although I wondered if he was basically done being a head coach at this level. Shows what I know.

Hey, hey it’s HOT SEAT TIME! Last year my top two were jettisoned and Herm got an all-timer of an on-field shitcanning. I am still surprised some made it to this season (I am looking at you Mike Bloomgren) but all in all this list is a list I am actually proud of since I actually do well at it, as morbid as that sounds.

Alright let’s get to the list. Going with the new categorizations as well this time around. Let’s go!

Almost Guaranteed Shitcanning

  1. Neal Brown (West Virginia) – He was #3 on my list last season and I honestly don’t know how he is still employed in Morgantown. And it’s not like things are looking super rosy there. Needed to keep his job – Honestly? A fucking miracle. Prediction – A mid-to-late-season shitcanning and no job next year as he starts quite a few rungs down the ladder in 2025.
  2. Danny Gonzales (New Mexico) – Now let’s head to the southwest and a place that is very difficult to win at. Other than Rocky Long I don’t think anyone has really done anything of note in Albuquerque. The problem becomes how long do you give a coach a chance to win at a place where victories are at a premium? Honestly, Gonzales would be lower down the list if it wasn’t for what Jerry Kill did down the road in Las Cruces last year. Needed to keep his job – Vying for a bowl spot in the final two weeks of the regular season. Prediction – Near the bottom of the Mountain West pecking order yet again and maybe even a late-season firing.
  3. Dana Holgorsen (Houston) – Look, Drunk Uncle Dana is entertaining. But the shtick gets old. And if they are as mediocre as I believe they will be in their first year in the Big XII, it’ll be lights out for Holgorsen. Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility, period. Prediction – I don’t think they will even have a shot at a bowl game in the final week of the season meaning Dana’s fate will be pretty much sealed by that point.
  4. Eliah Drinkwitz (Missouri) – I don’t like harping on a guy’s looks but this guy looks more like Milton from Office Space than a college football head coach. Which is perfectly fine…if you win. This guy has hovered around .500 since coming to CoMo and I think a year under .500 would be the final straw. Needed to keep his job – At least a .500 record if not an upset or two inside the SEC. Prediction – I see him falling one game short of his goal and the athletic department feeling like they have to make a move now rather than wait.
  5. Mike Neu (Ball State) – Neu has had his moments at Ball State but really hasn’t rose above an also-ran in the MAC. The Cardinals seem to consistently sit near the bottom of the MAC West which gives plenty of reason for a coach to get jettisoned. Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility. That’s it, that’s all. Prediction – I can’t see them winning more than four games this season so expect him to be the most likely MAC head coach to be fired first.

Probable Shitcanning

  1. Ricky Rahne (Old Dominion) – Rahne really has not been able to recreate some of the magic that his predecessor, Bobby Wilder, had.  I’m not saying the Monarchs were great under Wilder: but they were fun to watch and competed hard. Haven’t seen as much of that under Double R.  Needed to keep his job – Be competitive and play some meaningful November football.  Prediction – Quite possibly the worst Group of Five team and a tough decision to be made by the athletic director.
  2. Tom Allen (Indiana) – Where are the 2020 Indiana Hoosiers?  We can finally say that that version of the team was a complete aberration which sucks for their fans.  Allen really is on borrowed time but there is the slight possibility he is kept on when the brand-new Big Ten starts next season without divisions.  A SLIGHT possibility.  Needed to keep his job – 4 or even 5 wins and looking more competitive against some better Big Ten teams.  Prediction – 3 wins and a quiet exit (for Tom).
  3. Mike Bloomgren (Rice) – The bloom comes off the rose yadda, yadda, yadda.  One of these years I am going to be right about this guy.  Not that I want to be: I am just genuinely befuddled as to why this guy is still the head coach at Rice.  Needed to keep his job – Not looking like a punching bag moving up to the American Conference.  Prediction – Four wins which isn’t bad but some bad losses inside the conference and finally his removal from the sidelines.

Possible Shitcanning

  1. Billy Napier (Florida) – Napier suffers from the fact that even if the previous few coaches have ended up as disasters they had their successes as well.  He hasn’t done anything and the Gators were barely bowl-eligible with a supposed franchise quarterback under centre.  Now it’s a step back.  It comes down to how far of a step back he will be allowed.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility should do the trick.  Prediction – I have them missing out on the postseason so there should be plenty of angry fans in Gainesville.
  2. Brent Pry (Virginia Tech) – Poor Brent.  Last season wasn’t too bad when he took over the Hokies.  This season on the other hand…I don’t see good things in Blacksburg.  Maybe I’ll be wrong (and lord knows I have been wrong in the past) but if it’s as tough a season as I think it will be for VaTech, Pry might be fine with being done as head coach.  Needed to keep his job – Some improvement over last year.  Prediction – I have the Hokies winning only one game this season. One. That is not improvement. At all.
  3. Greg Schiano (Rutgers) – I don’t know where Rutgers goes from here.  They’ve had a tough slog since joining the Big Ten.  They are the butt of pretty much every realignment joke and meme.  And I’m not sure firing Schiano, their best coach ever, will fix anything. But at some point, changes have to be made to at least try and improve.  Needed to keep his job – At least 4 wins but more to be competitive inside the Big Ten.  Prediction – 4 wins but the competitiveness part…yeah I don’t know about that.
  4. Terry Bowden (ULM) – Same spot for Terry as last year.  I honestly don’t know the end game for all of this.  I can’t see him coaching the Warhawks into being a top notch Sun Belt team. Is he grooming the next head coach? It’s very confusing. That’s why I put him here and not higher up the list.  Needed to keep his job – Have a better record than last year and put a scare into a few of the better Sun Belt teams.  Prediction – Last year I predicted one win for them. This year it’s two. Something has to give at some point.
  5. Shawn Elliott (Georgia State) – Look, it’s not like Georgia State is a destination coaching spot.  Saying that, the Sun Belt has become a lot tougher over the past half-a-decade.  So if you’re not moving forward, you’re falling further behind. And this is what it feels like with Georgia State. They aren’t getting worst but they aren’t improving and quite a few teams are leaving them in their dust.  Needed to keep his job – Competitive football in November and possibility for bowl eligibility during the final week.  Prediction – I have them at 4 wins this season so this could be an interesting off-season decision in Atlanta.
  6. Scot Loeffler (Bowling Green) – This is Scott (with one T)’s fifth season at Bowling Green.  I don’t know why that surprises me but it does.  The Falcons really haven’t done anything other than sneak into one bowl game in his tenure.  It is, however, Bowling Green so the expeectations are a lot lower here. At some point, though, thre has to be some semblance of results and this guy just isn’t delivering.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility and looking like a contender in the MAC East.  Prediction – No bowl game and they won’t look like a contender. Saying that, he may still be around for 2024 but on a very short leash.
  7. Jeff Hafley (Boston College) – It has been a struggle on the Hill for Hafley and with no divisions there’s nowhere really to hide now in the ACC. The lack of success over the past decade-plus could be what keeps Hafley on for 2024. Needed to keep his job – 5 wins and having a shot at a bowl on the final weekend. Prediction – 5 wins and they will have two shots to claim bowl eligibilty and will fail at both but it will be enough for another year with Hafley.

Doubtful Shitcanning (although it still could happen)

  1. Justin Wilcox (California) – Wilcox might not have to worry if Cal just shuts down the entire program.  I’m only half-joking with that sentence.  I think the athletic department has much bigger things to worry about right now.  Meaning if Wilcox is fired it might be done by text.  Needed to keep his job – Possible bowl contention.  Prediction – They aren’t going to a bowl game and it looks like, for now, they have to be thinking about filling a schedule for 2024 more than dealing with their below-average head coach.
  2. Mel Tucker (Michigan State) – Tucks signed for a lot of money to coach in East Lansing so last year better be an aberration.  Let’s be honest: even with being in arguably the toughest division in college football, the Spartans will be much improved this season. Shouldn’t be much of a worry here unless they come out of the gate VERY slowly.  Needed to keep his job – Probably 7 wins.  Prediction – He will get them to 7 and maybe, just maybe, they will put a scare into one of the top three teams in the division.
  3. Dana Dimel (UTEP) – Dimel must have been thanking his lucky stars once he saw the exodus from Conference USA.  Having a few newcomers join makes things a bit easier for the Miners this year and gives Dimel one more year, almost certainly, on the job.  Next season? Who knows.  Needed to keep his job –  Fighting for bowl eligibility during the final weekend.  Prediction – They should be bowl eligible in early November so the pressure will be off…for now.
  4. Thomas Hammock (Northern Illinois) – It feels like every other year at NIU things look good.  And then every other year things look bad. And so forth. So it should be good this year in Dekalb, no?.  Needed to keep his job – Look like a contender in the MAC West.  Prediction – I have them at five wins so maybe they will shock me?
  5. Don Brown (UMass) – Probably the toughest job for a head coach in FBS is being the head man at UMass.  I have said for years now that the Minutemen should just drop to the FCS. I still think they should but I do understand the financial ramifications. Still, at some point don’t you think the fans yearn for something more than a couple of wins a season at most?  Needed to keep his job – Win a game. Any game.  Prediction – I think they win one game and I’m not guaranteeing it will be against their one FCS opponent. Brown should be fine going into 2024.

I think I say this ever year but I have to go back one day and really determine how good I am at this coaching hot seat list. I feel I do well and I hope the numbers would back me up. But I am used to disappointment so I am not holding my breath.

There’s a reason I don’t get a Heisman ballot. I am sure if even if I was the most prominent college football journalist in the land they would say “Sorry, Bossman, no can do.” Probably because my ballots have been mostly garbage in the past. Let’s see if I can somehow do better this year. Let’s just get to my ballot before I regret even posting this.

Bossman’s Heisman Ballot of Mediocrity

  1. Jordan Travis, Florida State – I know everyone and their mother is picking Caleb Williams to win the Heisman. I can’t see that happening because voters almost seem to want to avoid giving any player not named Archie Griffin back-to-back Heismans and most of the time it goes to a player on a team that’s in the Top 4 (or close to it). Travis is predicted to at least go to New York for the ceremony so it’s not like I am way off here. Plus, I think his passing stats will explode as FSU hits the CFP for the first time in what feels like forever.
  2. Caleb Williams, USC – Because I don’t have the Trojans winning the title this season or getting to the College Football Playoff is one of the main reasons I think Williams doesn’t win his second Heisman. He should be close to his passing stats from last season and at least he will make the voters think twice all year as he will never be far from the top of the Heisman hopefuls list.
  3. Drake Maye, North Carolina – Maye is only a sophomore this season so he may be prepping for his true Heisman run in 2024. He will turn a lot of heads this season, though, with UNC battling FSU and Clemson at the top of the ACC.
  4. Bo Nix, Oregon – Bo’s move from the SEC to the Pac-12 was huge and reinvigorated his fledgling career. Much of the Ducks’ hopes this year to win the Pac-12 in their swan song season rests on his shoulders and it is going to be a dogfight at the top. One huge game from Bo in a big conference game could put Oregon in the national title picture.
  5. Marvin Harrison Jr., Ohio State – As long as the Buckeyes can figure out who is going to be flinging the ball over the field at quarterback, Harrison should have a monster season. There is an outside chance that he will be the #1 pick in the NFL Draft so I am sure he will be going all-out all season. As long as Ryan Day doesn’t decide to run the ball a lot more this season, Harrison is tOSU’s ticket to New York.
  6. Michael Penix Jr., Washington – I believe that, as is the case lately, that the Pac-12 teams will beat each other up and no one will be high enough in the rankings to be in the CFP. For some players it’s not a huge issue (see: Williams, Caleb last year). For some, it’s the main reason they either don’t win the Heisman or don’t get invited to New York at all. I see Penix being one of those guys. Washington will be very good but not quite good enough and stuck in a group of six teams that are all pretty damn good this year. Playing out west doesn’t help either, despite what some may say.
  7. J.J. McCarthy, Michigan – Here is the guy under center (centre?) who will finally push Michigan over the top this year. He won’t throw for a shit-ton of yards but it will be enough (along with this ground game) to put him in the Heisman conversation for a bit at least. A win over tOSU alone may give him the New York invite (if it was up to Michigan fans).
  8. Quinn Ewers, Texas – Texas is probably a huge dark horse pick to win it all this year and Ewers has to be considered a bit of a dark horse Heisman cadidate. The only thing that could make this not the case is if he has a bad quarter or two and Sark gets an itchy trigger finger and puts Arch Manning in for longer than a few series.
  9. Cade Klubnik, Clemson – The Fighting Dabos are going to be back on top…at least through the regular season. I don’t think many will be surprised with this. I’m not fully sold on Klubnik but he is an improvement on D.J. Uiagalelei and the Tigers defense will be able to pick up the slack when he struggles a bit. But those struggles will cost him a seat at the Heisman table I’m sure.
  10. Jayden Daniels, LSU – Hey, have you ever remembred a time where the quality of the quarterbacks in the SEC has been this low? Not saying Daniels isn’t good because he is. But there are a few teams, Alabama and Georgia most notably, that have potential QB issues this season in the SEC and a few other teams that have returning quarterbacks that are honestly just above-average at best. Daniels may get some Heisman talk just because he may end up being that much better than any other QB in the conference.

Honourable Mention

  • Blake Corum, Michigan
  • Sam Hartman, Notre Dame
  • Joe Milton III, Tennessee
  • Braelon Allen, Wisconsin
  • Kyle McCord, Ohio State
  • Drew Allar, Penn State
  • Harold Perkins, LSU
  • Brock Bowers, Georgia
  • J.T. Tuimoloau, Ohio State

There you go. If one of those nineteen aforementioned players wins the Heisman, I will feel…well, good is not quite correct. Satisfied? Sure, let’s go with that.

The college football predictions…..they are complete! In a little less than half a year from now, I will find out how poorly I did. Gee, I can’t wait.

At some point soon I will do my lovely NFL predictions which are sure to also be not fully correct. Then…….Week…..Fucking…….ZERO!!!!!! I will have the schedule up at least a few days before the games commence. And yes, if you are looking for games on the specialty pack, don’t. Week Zero has almost never shown Week Zero games. Almost. Kind of a crapshoot with these idiotic Canadian cable companies. Enjoy your week everyone!

Oh man, here we go again

It felt like things were calm. We were all lulled into this. It was just the eye of the storm. Sure the wind wasn’t moving but about 200 metres away, a cow just went flying headlong into a barn.

What am I talking about? Realignment, of course! Another shoe has dropped…OK let me use a different analogy. Sorry Deion. We have another big move as Colorado will be going back to the Big XII starting next season. And that probably won’t be all. The rumours have at least one of Arizona, Arizona State, Utah, Oregon or Washington following the Buffaloes. Or, if no other schools leave the Pac-12, the Big XII is more than willing to dip into the American Conference (hello SMU, Memphis, Tulane) or even way out east…yes, UConn! And maybe once the Pac-12 (or more like Pac-9) gets their act together, they can start bringing in teams from the Group of Five. The same teams from the American would be in play, especially SMU. Also, the Mountain West would be watching closely as San Diego State, Boise State and perhaps Colorado State and UNLV could be looked at. There will be a lot of meetings in the next month or so to determine where this all leads.

For now let’s focus on what this post was supposed to be (and still will be). It’s time for the Power Five conference predictions. This will give a better indication on how I think things will go during this season. So let’s dive right in!

Changes are coming soon for the Ess Ee Cee. Texas and Oklahoma join the conference next season. Also, no more SEC on CBS after this year. Everything moves to ABC and ESPN. And finally, no divisions. Halle-fucking-lujah.

As for this year, all the talk is about Georgia and doing something no team has done (fully) in the AP Poll era: win three national championships in a row. It’s not like they will fall apart, despite the fact they lost their starting quarterback and a bunch of other players in the NFL Draft. Then again, I’m sure Kirby Smart has looked them all dead in the eye and told them “Everyone thinks you are going to go 5-7 and lose to Vanderbilt. Prove them wrong!” And they will believe it because college football head coaches are just a notch-and-a-half below cult leaders in the pecking order of how much they can make their “followers” drink their Kool-Aid.

Remember, though, there are other teams in the conference as well. Like those lovable underdogs from Tuscaloosa, Alabama, and the team that just reeks of success (in the classroom and on the baseball diamond), Vanderbilt. And eleven other teams. Want to find out how I think they will do? OK. I will do that. Just for you.

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Georgia 7 1 11 1
Tennessee 6 2 10 2
South Carolina 5 3 8 4
Kentucky 3 5 6 6
Missouri 2 6 5 7
Florida 2 6 5 7
Vanderbilt 1 7 4 8
  West        
Alabama 8 0 12 0
LSU 6 2 9 3
Ole Miss 4 4 8 4
Texas A&M 4 4 8 4
Arkansas 3 5 7 5
Auburn_Tigers_Logo Auburn 3 5 7 5
Mississippi State 2 6 6 6

Just For You

  • You might think I am crazy for having UGA not run the table. I do think they will lose a regular season game and it will be to those upstart Tennessee Volunteers. It won’t keep them from winning the division though as you can see I have those same Vols losing two conference games during the regular season.
  • As for the SEC West, though, Bama will once again rule the roost….as long as they figure out their quarterback situation. I am thinking they will and will go undefeated and be #1 in the nation going into conference championship weekend. If they don’t get their QB situation settled…well, maybe they lose two games? Three? It’s not like they will fall to 6-6.
  • I could see South Carolina or last year’s SEC West champs, LSU, making a bit of a run this time around. They have the top two quarterbacks in the SEC and could each put up piles of points. Watch for the Cocks’ game against Georgia early on in the season and LSU’s post-Halloween trip to Bryant-Denny to face the Tide. Upsets in either of those games will seriously upset the apple cart.
  • Look, the Gators were barely .500 with who I think may be one of the most overhyped quarterbacks in recent memory. I don’t think Anthony Richardson was that great. And now they don’t even have him. Unless every other part of the roster improved (it didn’t), how do people expect this team to bounce back and all of a sudden become an eight or nine win team? Spoiler alert: they won’t.
  • I have Mississippi State at 6-6. They will do just enough to get a bowl game. I wonder how tough it will be after the loss of Mike Leach but I can see them straightening things out just in time late in the season.
  • As for the SEC Championship, SURPRISE! I have the Dawgs beating the Tide and creating a massive clusterfuck in the final College Football Playoff rankings. Fun times!
  • Eleven bowl teams from the SEC with two juuuuuust on the outside. That’s insane and I don’t think I will be that far off with this prediction. Next year could be even crazier with Texas and Oklahoma joining the conference that just means more.

Man have things really changed in terms of where you will see Big Ten games this season. Gone are ABC and ESPN. In is NBC and CBS. This is gonna feel weird the first time I see it. And maybe the next few times as well. I will get used to it at some point. Now if you want the opportunity to watch every Big Ten game, better find a way to get FOX Sports One and Peacock otherwise you will be shit out of luck to watch potential bangers like Northwestern-Purdue and Indiana-Rutgers (if they end up there and not the Big Ten Network).

Alright, let’s get into the final conference predictions before the B1G gives a big Fuck You to geography and brings in USC and UCLA.

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Michigan 8 1 11 1
Penn State 8 1 11 1
Ohio State 8 1 10 2
Michigan State 5 4 7 5
Maryland 5 4 8 4
Indiana 1 8 3 9
Rutgers 1 8 4 8
  West        
Minnesota 6 3 8 4
Wisconsin 6 3 9 3
Iowa 6 3 9 3
Illinois 5 4 7 5
Nebraska 2 7 5 7
Purdue 2 7 5 7
Northwestern 0 9 2 10

Geogpraphy, Go Eat a Dick

  • Look, I know some might look at the Big Ten East standings and think I am a bit crazy. I am not. Although that is what a crazy person would tell you. Yep, a three-way tie at the top at 8-1 between Big Blue, tOSU and PSU. Because each team will be 1-1 against the other two, the CFP Rankings will decide the winner. I believe the Wolverines will somehow win that. And yes, I think Ohio State also loses to Notre Dame. O-H! I-No.
  • If Sparty doesn’t make it to a bowl game, they may end up giving Mel Tucker the Herm Edwards treatment and fire him before he can leave the playing surface one game. I get they have a tough division but they should be able to do well enough against the rest of their schedule to get back in the postseason after last year’s debacle.
  • No, I don’t have Wisconsin winning the West division. Meaning I am different than almost every expert out there. Also, there’s the fact I’m not an expert but I digress. Again I have a damn three-way tie but no need to look at the rankings for this one as I believe the Gophers will Row the Fucking Boat all the way to Indianapolis after beating both Wisky and the high-octane Iowa Hawkeyes. See what I did there? Yeah, I don’t care that the Hawkeyes have a new quarterback in town. Until Kirk tells his son to do better, Iowa will be pushing for some 7-6 victories. Sorry. 8-6. Two field goals and a late safety to win.
  • Nebraska will be better but I think the Huskers are a season away from getting back to the top of the West…just in time for the West to just not exist anymore.
  • As for Northwestern…man. What a shitshow. Look, I played a lot of sports earlier in my life and did so at the university level. Are there fun little pranks and stupid things the rookies have to do? Sometimes. But it’s usually harmless. Carrying bags, standing up during a team dinner to get embarrassed by singing some Mariah Carey song, dumb things like that. Not getting fucking dry humped in some cultish fashion by weirdos in robes. What the fuck is wrong with that school? And yes, it’s not just the football program. Sounds like at least half the teams there have serious issues. Ugh.
  • Now let’s get crazy. Yeah! The Big Ten Championship will…OK who am I kidding. It won’t be close. I have Michigan plowing through Minny to clinch their spot, yet again, in the College Football Playoff.

Might as well call this the Stable Conference…for now. Just nothing happening here which is just fine for most of the teams in the ACC. Status quo isn’t a bad thing. There are some changes with where you will see games. The CW…yes, the C-Fucking-W, will have an ACC game during most of the weeks of the season. You can take the ACC out of Jefferson-Pilot (or Raycom) but you can’t take the Jefferson-Pilot (or Raycom) out of the ACC. Or something like that.

So before this conference possibly gets pillaged by the Big Ten and SEC, let’s get to the predictions followed by some deep tissue massage and/or analysis.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Clemson 8 0 12 10
Florida State 7 1 11 1
North Carolina 6 2 9 3
Pittsburgh 5 3 8 4
Louisville 5 3 8 4
Duke 4 4 8 4
Wake Forest 4 4 7 5
NC State 4 4 7 5
Miami 4 4 7 5
Syracuse 3 5 6 6
Boston College 2 6 5 7
Virginia 2 6 4 8
Georgia Tech 2 6 4 8
Virginia Tech 0 8 1 11

Deep Tissue Massage and/or Analysis

  • I should book a massage. My back is in horrible shape.
  • Some may scoff at me having Clemson going undefeated this season. They have the schedule to do it and if Cade Klubnik is as good as he can be this could relatively easily happen. If Klubnik struggles…well then this entire set of standings might need to be scrubbed from existence.
  • Reader Gord will like where I have Florida State. This team could be scary good. And at the very least, they will be near the top of the ACC standings this season. Mike Norvell has done a great job getting this team back to what it was like during the Jimbo Fisher days. I had my doubts about him but I have to admit he has been the right guy to right the ship in Tallahassee.
  • Hey did you notice? NO DIVISIONS! I love it.
  • Don’t be surprised that if Clemson or FSU stumbles that there are no shortage of teams that could get one of the two ACC title game slots. A list of seven teams could pull off a couple of upsets and be at the top and it wouldn’t be a huge surprise. A slight surprise sure. Maybe a slightly bigger surprise if it was Miami or NC State. But not a massive surprise.
  • Poor Virginia Tech. I think this will be their worst team since before Frank Beamer graced Blacksburg. It feels like it has been forever since the Hokies were contenders. It was only seven years ago when they were in the ACC Championship and almost upset the eventual national champions, Clemson. This team is pretty bad in almost every aspect of the game and the schedule will not be helpful to them. Other than Old Dominion I don’t see them winning any other game and the Monarchs have given VT all sorts of fits the past few years.
  • Look for a tiny bit of a bounce back from Virginia. Just them taking the field after what happened last year is a win in my books.
  • For that ACC title game, how about another game that will turn everything on its head. Yep, I think the Noles will get revenge for a regular season loss by inching out the Tigers. Chaos!

OK it’s about time the Big XII rebrands. They will have at least thirteen teams by the time the 2024 season starts and it may be as high as sixteen. So change the fucking name. They have the rights to the Big Fourteen and Big Sixteen so use one of those. It would be easy. Find a graphic design student at Kansas and have them do a new logo. Easy peasy. Why do I have to come up with everything?

Where was I? Oh that’s right, predictions. Let’s see if this conference will go all Pac-12 and cannibalize itself or if they can see a team get to the CFP once again. Also, Texas and Oklahoma will be trying their best to leave the conference on a high note much to the chagrin of the rest of the schools in the conference. So here are the Big XII standings predictions, followed by Belly Expansions.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Texas 8 1 10 2
Kansas State 7 2 10 2
Baylor 6 3 8 4
TCU 6 3 9 3
Oklahoma 6 3 9 3
Texas Tech 5 4 8 4
Oklahoma State 5 4 8 4
Kansas 4 5 7 5
UCF_Knights_logo UCF 4 5 7 5
BYU_Athletic_Logo.svg_ BYU 3 6 5 7
cincinnati bearcats Cincinnati 3 6 5 7
Houston_Cougars_Logo_(1999-2012) Houston 2 7 4 8
Iowa_State_Cyclones_logo Iowa State 2 7 4 8
west virginia West Virginia 2 7 3 9

Belly Expansions

  • No I don’t mean pregnancy. I mean eating a big meal and having to loosen the ol’ belt or just unbuckle the pants altogether. Funny enough, people in the restaurant don’t appreciate that.
  • Let’s start at the bottom. There won’t be one truly bad team. There will be a bunch of below-average ones. West Virginia, Iowa State, Houston, Cincinnati and BYU could all finish last and I am sure no one would bat an eye.
  • I see the Longhorns making their final Big XII season a special one. They have the team, the schedule and the head coach (I think) to be the top team in this conference this season. The only question will be can Quinn Ewers hold off Arch Manning. Will one of them transfer in the offseason? Remember, when you have two starting quarterbacks, you have none. I think.
  • How about this lukewarm take: Kansas State will be good again. Yeah really going out on a limb there Bossman. This team has become so steady-as-she-goes it’s almost boring. The people in the Little Apple are fine with this.
  • I do think one of the newcomers will make a bowl game and that team will be UCF. I think they are the most prepared of the newbies coming into this conference. But make no mistake about it: all four teams will be good at various points over the next few years.
  • I can’t see Oklahoma taking enough of a leap to get to the Big XII Championship. Nor do I think the Horned Frogs of TCU have the, uh, toads? to make it back to the conference title game. Good seasons for both, yes, but not great.
  • The Longhorns should win the conference title game in their final season in the Big XII. Will this get them into the CFP or will it “relegate” them to the New Year’s Six? I think you can tell from my predictions so far but you will know for sure in a different post.

So where are we going to be able to watch Pac-12 games in the future? Who the hell knows. My money is on PBS.

But seriously, the Pac-12 is quickly dropping from the Conference of Champions to almost a Group of Five conference. They are losing USC and UCLA next year to the Big Ten. They knew that already. The bombshell of Colorado leaving now has them at nine teams starting the 2024 season. And it may not end there. The only schools I haven’t heard potentially leaving are Oregon State and Washington State. That’s not to say all these rumours will be correct but I will be pretty surprised if no more teams leave for the Big XII before next season. It’s sad for a conference that really started their slide once Pete Carroll left USC for the NFL. Thanks a bunch, Peter.

Prediction time! No divisions which is one thing they are ahead of the game with, starting that last year. Let’s get to those divisionless predictions followed by some California Nightmarin’.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
USC 8 1 10 2
Utah 7 2 9 3
Oregon 7 2 9 3
Oregon State 7 2 10 2
Washington State 6 3 8 4
Washington 6 3 9 3
UCLA 5 4 8 4
Colorado 3 6 4 8
California 2 7 4 8
Arizona 2 7 4 8
Arizona State 1 8 3 9
Stanford 0 9 2 10

California Nightmarin’

  • No state will have it better this year in the Pac-12 than the state of Oregon. Both the Ducks and the Beavers look to be serious contenders and only need the ball to bounce their way one extra time to maybe get to the Pac-12 Championship. And considering the way that title game has gone, who knows what may happen after that.
  • The strongest team, though, should be USC. They have Caleb Williams coming back to try and do what no one other than some guy named Archie has ever done, and that’s win two Heisman Trophies. The hope there is that the sting of the two season-ending losses will motivate them to push themselves that final step into the CFP.
  • OK look, I know you see Washington in sixth place and you are wondering what the fuck is wrong with me. This is another case where the schedule is just flat-out against them. A slightly easier schedule and I might put this team at eleven or even, dare I say it, twelve wins. It will be that close at the top of the conference.
  • On the other hand, I am sure no will think I’m crazy for putting Stanford in last place. It’s been a long time since the Cardinal have been this bad and it doesn’t look like they will be ready for bowl action for another year at least.
  • I think I was fair putting Colorado at 4-8 for this season and playing fairly meaningful football going into November. There seems to be two schools of thought with this team. One section thinks Coach Prime has done wonders and with all the fresh faces in the lineup it will push the team over the line and into bowl-eligibility territory. The other section thinks the entire program is overhyped and they will win maybe two games. I am in the middle on this. This team won’t go bowling this year. That would be too much of a leap. But they should win more games than they did last year. If not, what the hell was all this hoopla for?
  • As for the Pac-12 title game, USC gets the Pac-12 Championship they probably should have won last year. Problem is that by this point there will be a lot of teams in the mix for those four College Football Playoff spots and in typical Pac-12 fashion, the league will have cannabilized itself again and missed out on the CFP again.

There you go! You now have a complete set of Bossman conference predictions. Next up, is kind of the wrap-up post where I put everything in a nice, neat little ball and let you know who I believe will win the whole damn deal. Have a great week everyone!

The G-5. It’s like that big vat of McDonald’s orange drink…

Many of the better teams have gone on to greener pastures. They have been replaced (kind of) by weaker teams from FCS. So yeah, they keep watering down the Group of Five. How far can they water it down? Groundskeeper Willie thinks we need to stop. I sort of agree with the angry Scot.

As you already know, Houston, UCF and Cincinnati left the American Conference for the Big(ger) XII. BYU joined them from the Independent ranks but the Cougs were always a weird hybrid since leaving the Mountain West. Not quite Power Five but better than Group of Five. Either way, they moved up as well.

Coming up from FCS is Sam Houston (not the wrestler) and Jacksonville State (two Gamecocks? What is this, the CFL?). Kennesaw State joins next season. All three teams will be in Conference USA. Yeah, the teams coming in don’t exactly measure up to the teams leaving.

What this does, though, is open the door for other teams to ascend to a level where they are almost always competing for the Group of Five crown. Boise State is the only program left who constantly contends for the one G-5 spot in the New Year’s Six. Tulane went last season and looks like a team that should continue that kind of success this season. UTSA, SMU, San Diego State and a few Sun Belt squads also have their eye on that singular prize. Let’s get to the conference standings and see where I believe thing will head this season.

Man, imagine the Big East was back? That conference would be…well, it would be pretty good. Not amazing. But a step above the Group of Five. Anyway…

The cream of the crop among Group of Five conferences is the AAC until further notice. The Mountain West has tried their best but it feels like that competition is over, even if Boise State does win the G-5 title. The Sun Belt is gaining but I can never see them catching the American under the current format. So let’s look at the predictions for the Kings of the G-5 followed by some marinations:

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Tulane 8 0 11 1
UTSA logo UTSA 7 1 10 2
Memphis 6 2 8 4
SMU 6 2 8 4
Florida_Atlantic_Owls_logo FAU 4 4 6 6
East Carolina 4 4 7 5
Navy 4 4 5 7
North_Texas_Mean_Green_logo North Texas 4 4 7 5
UAB UAB 3 5 4 8
Tulsa_Golden_Hurricane_logo Tulsa 3 5 4 8
South_Florida_Bulls_logo USF 3 5 3 9
Rice_Owls_logo Rice 2 6 4 8
Temple_T_logo Temple 2 6 4 8
49ers_wordmark Charlotte 0 8 1 11

Marinating in American Sauce

  • Honestly, that sounds disgusting. I am surprised no one has created it…whatever it might end up being.
  • Look, Tulane is not coming down from their perch. The schedule is, once again, in their favour and other than a huge matchup against South Alabama to start their season and their season-ending matchup with UTSA, the rest of the schedule is more than manageable. Expect the American Championship to go through New Orleans for the second straight year.
  • No surprise with the Roadrunners of UTSA (I just said that in Greg Gumbel voice) being the team that will end up facing the Green Wave for the conference title. This program is seriously on the rise and could soon enough be called the premiere Group of Five team (until they are poached by the Big XII).
  • Memphis and SMU will be good once again. But as has been the case, both teams will probably drop at least one game they should win and that is what will ultimately cost them the chance to upset Tulane for the league title.
  • Some people are very high on Florida Atlantic with their new head coach Tom Herman. I am taking more of a wait and see approach. The same goes for North Texas as they break in a new head coach as well.
  • I believe Navy will go into the Army-Navy Game needing a win for bowl eligibility. Well, you can tell by their record what I think will happen. I wonder how bowl committees will deal with this. Maybe some bowl gives them the first ever conditional bowl bid? That would actually be kind of exciting. Win and you’re in. Lose and your bid goes to James Madison.
  • As for the AAC Championship, I see Tulane winning their second game against UTSA in as many weeks to be crowned the AAC champion. I don’t see the Green Wave having an easy time in either game though but they will feel lucky not to be in the Alamodome for either of these games.
  • Seven projected bowl bids for a conference with fourteen teams. Not exactly great but I think it will take some time for teams like Charlotte and Rice to get acclimated to their new surroundings. Especially since they weren’t that great in the conference they came from.

I am a bit worried that I won’t be ready to do the long Saturday nights that the Mountain West (and Pac-12) give us. Don’t even mention the Hawaii Tests. And this is at a time when I am desperately trying to restrict my caffeine intake. Ugh, this could be very interesting. Maybe I’ll just drink the entire time.

This is the second year of the Mountain West deal with FOX so we won’t see nearly as many MWC games. Yes there will be at least one every week on CBS Sports Network and we get some early-season CBS affairs but with no conference games on any of the ESPN networks, it really hinders our ability as Canadians to watch this conference. Hell, we can probably watch more Conference USA this season.

OK let’s get to this season’s predictions followed by sleep deprived lunacy:

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Boise State 8 0 10 2
San Diego State 6 2 8 4
Fresno State 6 2 8 4
Air Force 5 3 9 3
Wyoming 5 3 7 5
San Jose State 4 4 6 6
UNLV 4 4 5 7
Utah State 3 5 4 8
Nevada 3 5 3 9
Colorado State 2 6 3 9
New Mexico 1 7 2 10
Hawaii 1 7 3 10

Juuuuust a tiny bit of Sleep-Deprived Lunacy

  • You will notice something different with these standings compared to all the others I have predicted in the past. No divisions! About damn time. Divisions are just useless in this day and age. And soon enough, no FBS conference will have divisions. I am certain of that.
  • Reader John might not be too pleased with this but I think Boise State runs through the conference schedule with relative ease. Not saying teams like SDSU, FSU or Air Force aren’t good. It’s just that the Broncos’ schedule is so favourable you’d have to be crazy to think they don’t have a great shot not just to win the conference, but that one New Year’s Six spot. Really, their September will shape their season. Be at least 3-2 at the end of the month and they will be on their way. Less than that and the conference might just be up for grabs.
  • In terms of teams just below that top tier, Wyoming should ho-hum their way into another bowl game. I can’t believe Craig Bohl has been in Laramie for almost half of the life of the Mountain West conference it self. SJSU and UNLV will be in a dogfight for a bowl spot and I could honestly see it going either way. But no, I don’t agree with that one voter who thinks the Rebels will win the conference crown. I think that person was obviously coming off a gambling-coke-and-booze fueled bender when they made that choice.
  • I’ve got the Aztecs winning the tiebreaker with Fresno to get the other MWC Championship spot opposite Boise on the frigid smurf turf. I think the weather is what gives the Broncos the edge in this one as I have them winning the conference championship and then awaiting to see what happens in the rest of the Group of Five.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd we’re back down to four teams. Liberty and New Mexico State fucked off to Conference USA and BYU headed to the Big XII, leaving Notre Dame less little brothers to have to hang around with. The thing is, if you took UMass out of the equation…well, you’ll see. Let’s get right to the short set of predictions followed by some actual team-by-team analysis (which is much easier with just four teams):

    Overall
    W L
Notre Dame 10 2
Army 6 6
Connecticut_Huskies_logo UConn 6 6
UMass 1 11

Actual Team-by-Team Analysis (I wasn’t lying!)

  • Of course we have to start with the team that doesn’t belong in this entire post, the Notre Dame Fighting Irish. It was tough going through their schedule because I don’t know how much they will improve from last year. But they have Sam Hartman. A bonafide Heisman contender at quarterback for the first time in I don’t know how many years. So my ten win prediction for them doesn’t seem too far off the mark and it wouldn’t surprise me if they were able to get to eleven either and get in the College Football Playoff converstaion.
  • Hey, remember what I said about Navy earlier? That they would be playing for their bowl-eligibility lives in the Army-Navy game? Well, guess who else I think will be in the same boat. Oh yes. I think this will be, easily, the most important Army-Navy Game in a long time. I now wonder if the provisional bowl selection will be a winner-take-all type of deal. Which would be so damn awesome to see.
  • Will UConn get back to a bowl game? That seems to be a huge question. And to be honest, I think bowl eligibility is almost the floor for this program. Amazing what can happen when you get the right coach in the right spot. Is Jim Mora Jr. an amazing coach? Not really. But he’s good and he landed in the perfect spot for him and the Huskies. Now they have to avoid what happened in the past even when they were somewhat decent: lose games to teams they should beat. Do that and they should be in the postseason once again.
  • And finally we get to the Minutemen and yes, they will be awful. Quite possibly the worst FBS team once again. I predict them to win one game. That’s it. And it won’t be against Merrimack. I think they squeak by New Mexico and that’s all. And even then, I could see this team go winless. I’m not as huge an advocate of moving teams back down to FCS as I used to be but I do wonder if UMass just needs to drop down. There’s nothing keeping them up in FBS. No conference affiliation and no possibilities in the near future. It might be time to pull the trigger on this program’s demotion.

The Sun Belt (and MAC) are being joined by Conference USA when it comes to mid-week action this season. I will have to check but we may have football every day for over a month.

Other than that, there are less similarties than ever between the Sun Belt and the MAC or Conference USA. The Fun Belt has set themselves up pretty well as the third best Group of Five conference. They are actually closer in quality to the Mountain West than the MAC which is something that never would have been said even five years ago. Also, they seem to be pretty safe from any realignment unless some doomsday scenario comes about and college football conferences as we know it change forever. And I’m not going to say that won’t happen.

Anyway, for now, let’s get to my predictions for the eighth-best FBS conference followed by some upbeat comments:

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Appalachian State 7 1 8 4
james madison James Madison 6 2 8 4
Coastal Carolina 6 2 9 3
Marshall_Thundering_Herd_logo Marshall 5 3 7 5
Georgia State 2 6 4 8
Georgia Southern 2 6 5 7
Old_Dominion_Athletics_logo Old Dominion 0 8 1 11
  West        
South Alabama 7 1 9 3
Troy 7 1 10 2
Southern_Miss_Athletics_logo Southern Miss 5 3 6 6
Louisiana 4 4 7 5
Arkansas State 2 6 4 8
Texas State 2 6 3 9
ULM 1 7 2 10

Upbeat Comments

  • Well…upbeat for some teams.
  • The top of each of the divisions continue to be exciting. It’s the one conference that defies my No Divisions preference. In the East, you have four legitimate contenders and you can possibly say the same for the West. Parity rules the day in the Sun Belt once again.
  • App State, after an odd year that saw some pretty extreme highs and lows, should be back on top of the mountion in the East, barely beating out JMU and Coastal.
  • South Alabama will finally get their shot at the Sun Belt Championship with what I believe will be a late-season win over Troy.
  • As for bowl games, officially only seven of the contenders I’ve mentioned would be able to go to a bowl. But, I have a bit of a surprise for Dukes fans once I put out my bowl predictions post.
  • I still say the Sun Belt champ should get a shot at an SEC team in New Orleans. Imagine how many fans they would get for that?

As I said above, the Sun Belt and Conference USA have a lot of weekday night games now. But it still isn’t MACtion. The originators to us sickos that love more and more and more football. I don’t even care about the attendance issues that these games cause. The MAC is getting their ESPN money and I am getting my football fix. Everyone wins!

Alright, predictions time followed by some points in a Midwestern accent:

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Ohio 7 1 8 4
Miami-OH 5 3 7 5
Buffalo 4 4 5 7
Bowling Green 3 5 4 8
Akron 3 5 4 8
Kent State 0 8 1 11
  West        
Toledo 7 1 9 3
Eastern Michigan 6 2 9 3
Central Michigan 4 4 4 8
Northern Illinois 3 5 5 7
Western Michigan 3 5 3 9
Ball State 3 5 4 8

Points with Pork Chops and Aeeeplesauce

  • I mean I’m not gonna lie: I like pork chops and applesauce. I just think it’s way more of a staple in a place like Minnesota than here.
  • Looks like two teams who are used to being near the top should head back to the MAC title game. Not that Toledo and Ohio won’t have their speed bump games in the MAC but I feel they have the best talent to win their respective divisions.
  • Only two teams that will be with new head coaches this season and both of them are going to struggle. Lance Taylor takes over for Tim Lester at Western Michigan where Lester just couldn’t do what P.J. Fleck did there. Tall order but most were hoping he would be close and he wasn’t. As for Kent State, they lose Sean Lewis to Coach Prime and Colorado. Bring in Kenni Burns. Yes Kenni with an i. And ho boy is it going to be a long season in Kent for Mr. Burns.
  • I only see four bowl-eligible teams from the MAC. I have done this before and I was wrong. I just can’t see most of these teams doing enough in their non-conference schedule to get them to a bowl game in December.
  • Ford Field should see another dandy for the MAC Championship. I’ve got Ohio winning a close one over Toledo with the prize being to go back to Ford Field a few weeks later. At least the tie-in there states that they should face a Big Ten team. That’s the way it should be.

Hey remember what I used to say about Conference USA? Well, it has pretty much come to fruition. You would have to be some kind of dumb or not watch college football to know that this is now the bottom of the barrel when it comes to FBS conferences. I warned them. I’m sure others did too. And now they are stuck. Could they end up being not last place? Sure, maybe. But other than WKU and Liberty, what other teams are really pushing things here? That’s what I thought. Luckily they were able to snag a contract with ESPN to show games on weeknights in October. And when I say weeknights I mean all weeknight games. No Saturday conference games that month. I will be happy though because it means there will be college football on like four consecutive Tuesdays. Not a bad thing at all.

Now it’s time for predictions for the new-ish Conference USA followed by some weeknight non-sitcom commentary:

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
WKU_Athletics_logo WKU 7 1 9 3
Middle_Tennessee_Athletics_logo Middle Tennessee 6 2 8 4
Liberty_Flames_logo Liberty 6 2 9 3
UTEP_Miners_logo UTEP 4 4 6 6
New_Mexico_State_Aggies_logo New Mexico State 4 4 7 6
Louisiana_Tech_Athletics_logo Louisiana Tech 2 6 4 8
Sam-Houston-State-Bearkats-Logo Sam Houston 2 6 3 9
jacksonville_state_gamecocks Jacksonville State 2 6 3 9
FIU_Panthers_logo FIU 1 7 2 10

Weeknight Non-Sitcom Commentary

  • Look, with Austin Reed back at QB, he may throw over 5,000 yards. They should win the regular season title pretty easily and it wouldn’t surprise me if they ended up running the table as well.
  • There are some newcomers! Liberty is that one newcomer, though, that most are saying will win the conference title in their first year in C-USA. I say not so fast my friend. I don’t even see them getting to the conference title game. The Flames will most likely lose a game they should win and it will cost them that spot.
  • Yes, I have NMSU making a bowl game again! Jerry Kill has really turned things around in Las Cruces and with this new conference I see them already in the middle if not near the top.
  • On the other hand, Jacksonville State and Sam Houston make their FBS debut this season and it won’t be a kind one. They will struggle and need some time to find their way. Down the road, though, at least one of these programs will turn into one of the conference’s best, if not both of them. But at least they won’t be as bad as…
  • FIU. Yeesh. Mike MacIntyre will be pulling his hair out by the time this season is over.
  • So yeah, it’s Middle Tennessee against WKU and I don’t see it being that close but you never know. The Hilltoppers should win going away. Do you think these two teams are regretting not heading to the MAC?

We have completed the journey! Well…half of it. Next up is the Power Five conferences. Then, finally, a nice little bow to tie this whole thing together. Have a great week everyone!

Lists, Lists…..LISTS!

You’d think I was employed by Buzzfeed with all these lists I’m making.

So just like last year, I will add a few more lists to accompany the Most Important Games post. It should give you a good idea of the important games to watch (at least at this point) and maybe some games to avoid (unless you are a Sicko like me and will watch any football…even, yes…arena football!)

I know, I know, I have always stated my disgust for arena football but I have to admit it does have its own trashy charm to it. OK let’s just get to the lists, shall we?

Sneaky-Good/Underrated Games

I used to list a game like this for every week of the season. This time I will rank the top dozen games that should be considered underrated but very good and that didn’t rank in the Top 35 from the previous post.

  1. Oklahoma vs. Texas (at the Cotton Bowl) (Week 6, Noon, ABC/TSN2) – First of all, I am not on drugs. Not many are talking about the Sooners and most are calling for the Longhorns to walk off to the SEC with a Big XII Championship title. Do you remember what game this is? It’s the god damn Red River Shootout/Rivalry/Game/Brawl/Drinking Contest. Many times it is ridiculous, crazy, wild and just plain dumbfounding. Don’t count OU out…at least in this one game…….oh the second thing. Yeah, ABC has picked up this game but the time hasn’t been set. It will be either Noon or 3:30 because the State Fair of Texas becomes a gangland shootout at night or something like that.
  2. TCU at Kansas State (Week 8, Noon, specialty pack) – The rematch of last year’s Big XII title game loses a bit of its luster but should still be important in the grand scheme of things in the conference. I get it’s not Gary Patterson anymore but Sonny Dykes is already showing he can also make the whole greater than the sum of the parts. Chris Klieman will get every opportunity to show off why he got a big extended contract and this is one of those opportunities at home in front of the Wildcat faithful.
  3. Iowa at Wisconsin (Week 7, Noon, Big Ten Network) – As I said in the Most Important Games post, it feels like all the conference networks get at least one good game a season now. This could be that game, if it ends up there. Once again this could be for the Big Ten West title but it’s going to feel weird with Wisconsin not running the ball as much. Iowa, on the other hand, should be exactly the same, trying to win games 6-5.
  4. Texas A&M at Ole Miss (Week 10, Noon, specialty pack) – Many will sleep on these two teams…wait, bad analogy. I forgot Petrino was at College Station. Anyway, two teams that many will cast aside but it’s almost a guarantee one of them will cause a bit of a stink in the conference. Also, take the over.
  5. UCLA at Oregon State (Week 7, 5:30, Pac-12 Network) – Speaking of conference networks, here’s the worst of the bunch. That includes the Big XII’s non-existent network. Look, one of these two teams is going to be very good (I think) and will cause quite a few headaches at the top of the Pac-12 food chain (I think) and will end up being in the Pac-12 Championship (ehhhh, I don’t know).
  6. TCU at Oklahoma (Week 13, Friday, Noon, FOX, confirmed) – Black Friday will start with a game between a team who just got destroyed in the national championship and a team that normally is great and struggled to be bowl-eligible. Both teams will have something to prove and this could be their last real chance to do so (and make it count) this season.
  7. Kansas State at Texas Tech (Week 7, 3:30, ABC/TSN2) – I guess it makes sense that the Big XII fills a good portion of this section after almost being shut out of my Top 35 most important games of the season. The Red Raiders always put up the points, no matter who the quarterback, head coach, or receivers are. And KSU can also do that when they want to. Should be a shootout (of sorts).
  8. South Carolina at Texas A&M (Week 9, Noon, specialty pack) – More Fun Bobby! And Fun Shane…ok that one doesn’t have as good a ring to it. But BeamerBall 2.0 is a lot of fun to watch.
  9. Arkansas at Ole Miss (Week 6, 7:30, specialty pack) – Could Sam Pittman be the most lovable coach in the game right now? Perhaps. He still feels like a bit of an underdog and you always root for the underdog, right? Wait…I’m getting something here….a message…ah, OK. Lane Kiffin doesn’t agree.
  10. Minnesota at Iowa (Week 8, 3:30, FOX) – Row The Boat vs. Single-Digit Scoring. I am intrigued, I’m not going to lie. Plus we will see the best new tradition in all of not just college football but sports in general, the Iowa Wave.
  11. Duke at North Carolina (Week 11, 8:00, specialty pack) – The Eastern version of the Victory Bell could be important once again. Both teams look like they could slot in anywhere from three to six in the ACC this year (with no divisions thank god). So a win here and maybe an upset or two somewhere else and one of these programs will duke it out for a conference championship.
  12. Ole Miss at Tulane (Week 2, 3:30, specialty pack) – The game time is confirmed. I assume it heads to the specialty pack. Too bad because TSN would be smart to pick up this game. The Green Wave, who have to be considered to have the best odds to make it back as the best Group of Five team, hosting Ole Miss in what will be stiflingly hot weather in New Orleans…yeah I like Tulane’s chances but I still think it will be a close one.

Best Group of Five Games

Next up is our friends from the Group of Five. Three of them got invited to sit up at the adult table so overall this group is a tiny bit weaker. That just means other teams will have opportunities that they may not have had before. So let’s look at the best Group of Five games this season. And no, the Ole Miss-Tulane game above doesn’t count. This is full G5-on-G5 violence, bruh.

  1. UTSA at Tulane (Week 13, 7:00, specialty pack) – As per usual, the American Conference should make up the bulk of this list. The defending Group of Five champion (and Cotton Bowl champion), Tulane is the favourite to do it again. UTSA is in its first season in the American but already could be the team to knock the Green Wave off their perch. Huge game where I have to favour Tulane only because it’s in New Orleans not the Alamodome where the Roadrunners have a huge home advantage.
  2. Air Force at Boise State (Week 13, Friday, 4:00, FOX Sports One, confirmed) – Not having FS1 will deprive Canadians of a lot of good Mountain West action. This should be the conference’s game of the year and the winner probably goes to the Mountain West Championship. Being on the Smurf Turf, I would give the Broncos the slight edge here.
  3. South Alabama at Tulane (Week 1, 8:00, specialty pack) – This game is set for ESPNU on opening Saturday and, I can almost guarantee, will head to the specialty pack. The Jaguars (Jag-you-ares) came out of nowhere last season to almost win the Sun Belt. They are the favourites to win the conference and if they can pull the mini-upset here, could feasibly run the table. I guess I could say the same thing about Tulane.
  4. Boise State at Fresno State (Week 10, 10:00, CBS Sports Network, confirmed) – Hey it’s CBSSN’s first foray onto any of these lists. CBSSN is a nice palette cleanser really. It shows games you never would have normally watched. Plus it shows most of UConn’s games. I am liking CBSSN having the CFL. Yes it’s just a simulcast of TSN’s showing but it works. Kind of wish they would come up with at least their own play-by-play and analysis and just use the TSN visuals.
  5. Tulane at Memphis (Week 7, Friday, 7:00, TSN2) – It’s the time of year when the American and ACC split most of the Thursday and Friday night games on ESPN and their dysfunctional family of networks. TSN tends to show more Friday night games because they can put it on TSN2 and not have it interfere with the CFL’s Friday Night Football. Anyway, yes, it’s the Green Wave again. Bored yet? They might be that good. Maybe even legit Top 12 good if everything falls right.
  6. Boise State at San Diego State (Week 4, Friday, 10:30, CBS Sports Network, confirmed) – And here comes Boise State again. I mean I want to say there aren’t two obvious frontrunners in the G5 but there are. Both the Broncos and Tulane should be in it to the end to see who gets that single spot.
  7. South Alabama at Troy (Week 10, Thursday, 7:30, specialty pack) – Hey it’s not Tulane, Boise State, the American or the Mountain West! Let’s give the Sun Belt a lot of respect. They have become the third-best Group of Five conference and it’s a pretty wide gap between them and the two conferences below them, the MAC and Conference USA. The Battle for the Belt (so good to have a wrestling title belt as the rivalry trophy) should be for the de facto Sun Belt West title unless Louisiana or maybe Southern Miss has something to say about it.
  8. Boise State at Memphis (Week 5, 3:30, specialty pack) – This might end up on ESPN or ESPN2 depending on how both teams are doing at this point. I could see it happening because ESPN made a point to trade with CBS for this BSU road game.
  9. Tulane at East Carolina (Week 10, 3:30, specialty pack) – I figured East Carolina would have to find someone to replace Holton Ahlers and his 245 passes per game. Instead they plan to completely turn to the running game and grind teams into the turf. If this somehow works, Georgia Tech fans are gonna be real mad.
  10. WKU at Troy (Week 4, 3:30, ESPN+) – First Conference USA appearance and it heads to ESPN+. I have that this year for the first time so I am going to have a lot of fun and totally destroy my remote control this season with that. Kind of wish it even got to ESPNU so that the specialty packs could pick it up. I still think WKU and MTSU were foolish not to take the MAC’s potential invite as they are stuck now in arguably the worst FBS conference with not much in the way of rivalries.
  11. San Diego State at Air Force (Week 5, 8:00, CBS Sports Network, confirmed) – OK two teams that aren’t quite fitting the mold of the top G5 teams. Nice. And, if things go according to plan, we should see a bazillion yards rushing and the game might be over by 10:00.
  12. Eastern Michigan at Toledo (Week 11, Wednesday, 7:00, specialty pack) – Finally we end this list with a MACtion game since I have to. MACtion is awesome. We also have Fun Belt now and whatever the American conference calls their weeknight games. Oh and Conference USA is doing pretty much all weeknight games in October. Crazy! Anyway, this could very well be the two best MAC teams so let’s call this the de facto MAC West championship.

Best Group of Five vs. Power Five Games

Let’s bring back this section because these games are the ones many college football fans feast on. What is better than watching your hated rival lose to a Group of Five team? Not much. And I have always said, Group of Five teams, at least the better ones, should get their shot at Power Five teams to see what they are worth. If it wasn’t for that happening, very few teams would have moved up and the Power Five may have already separated from the rest of college football by now.

  1. Ole Miss at Tulane (Week 2, 3:30, specialty pack) – This was already discussed above but it is the biggest G5 vs. P5 game of the season and hosted by the Group of Five team which is a rarity but happening more often these days which is nice to see.
  2. UTSA at Tennessee (Week 4, 7:30, specialty pack) – The Roadrunners meep their way up the food chain to the American Conference this season and are already a contender for the league title (and perhaps a NY6 spot). The Vols will be really good this season but a UTSA win her would be massive for the program and for the college football season as a whole.
  3. Boise State at Washington (Week 1, 3:30, ABC/TSN2) – Everything is confirmed except for if the game will appear on TSN. I believe it will but we won’t know for like another two months. Ridiculous. Washington is looking to ride their Heisman contender quarterback all the way, hopefully, to the College Football Playoff so a slip-up here would almost derail that entire plan.
  4. WKU at Ohio State (Week 3, 4:00, FOX, confirmed) – Look, are the Hilltoppers going to win this? No. All we can hope for is for WKU to put a scare into tOSU. If, somehow, they ended up with the upset, it would be the biggest upset in the history of college football and you wouldn’t be able to convince me otherwise.
  5. Troy at Kansas State (Week 2, Noon, FOX Sports One, confirmed) – OK now this one has intrigue written all over it. Troy is one of a handful of teams that has legit New Year’s Six aspirations out of the Group of Five. Kansas State is the defending Big XII champions but have a few question marks. This feels ripe for an upset.
  6. SMU at TCU (Week 4, Noon, specialty pack) – The Battle for the Iron Skillet. This might be the best one yet if the Mustangs are as good as some say they will be. Not the favourite in the American so they will have to show out in games like this to catch voters’ eyes. This could be a good litmus test to see how far TCU has fallen from last year’s national runner-up team.
  7. San Diego State at Oregon State (Week 3, 3:30, FOX Sports One, confirmed) – This could be a tasty affair if the Aztecs step up and prove they could be eventually Pac-12 worthy in football. Otherwise, you might hear a lot of chainsaws going in this one since Oregon State is definitely a dark horse contender this season.
  8. SMU at Oklahoma (Week 2, 6:00, ESPN+, confirmed) – Ouch. Seeing this relegated to ESPN+ surprises me a bit but the Sooners are not the team they had been for the past few decades. The Sooners are going to try and come out of the gate swinging but don’t be surprised if the Stangs give them some trouble in this one.
  9. UCF at Boise State (Week 2, 7:00, FOX Sports One, confirmed) – Last year this would have been in the previous section. Now the Knights are in the Big XII but they may still be an underdog on this one. If I were a betting man I would put my money on the Broncos here as they are hoping to run the table and get back to where they believe they belong: as the top dog among the Group of Five.
  10. East Carolina at Michigan (Week 1, Noon, Peacock, confirmed) – The debut of Peacock on these lists. I am sure at some point it will be available for Canadians but we aren’t quite there yet. Yeah I don’t think this will be really close but you never know. I wonder if ECU can run on this Michigan offense. If they can, the entire Big Ten will be watching tape of this game all season to see if they can replicate it.
  11. UCLA at San Diego State (Week 2, 7:30, CBS, confirmed) – Nice to see the Mountain West appearing on CBS. The week before this we get Texas Tech/Wyoming and here we get a very interesting matchup that could easily lead to an upset, if SDSU has things going by the second week of the season.
  12. UTSA at Houston (Week 1, 7:00, FOX Sports One, confirmed) – The Cougs have stepped up to the Big XII conference. Good for them. Problem is they start their first season back on the top tier of college football against one of the best Group of Five teams. The only thing helping Houston is that the game is in Houston and not San Antonio. I am sure Drunk Uncle Dana will be about seven Red Bulls in by the time this one starts.

Worst Power Five Games

Didn’t think I’d forget this section, right? These are the games that you can probably avoid, unless they are close. They fill conference networks (and really are the reason those networks exist but I will not complain about that) and even sometimes creep onto FOX or an ESPN2 or ESPNU. Sad but true. Spoiler alert: I will still watch most of these games.

  1. Northwestern at Rutgers (Week 1, Sunday, Noon, CBS, confirmed) – What a way to show off the new Big Ten on CBS with a game between *checks notes* uh….Northwestern and Rutgers? My God that is not good at all. Who the hell is picking these games at CBS? The only thing I can think happened was that it was the last game remaining…like picking the last kid in dodgeball. Well, nothing else will be on at that time at least in a college football sense so guess what ol’ Bossman will be watching?
  2. Stanford at Colorado (Week 7, Friday, 10:00, TSN2) – This is confirmed for ESPN2 but who knows if TSN will pick it up or not. Look I understand there is a lot of hype with Deion Sanders now coaching at Colorado. And that’s a good thing for that program. But they will struggle to be bowl-eligible this season. Now Stanford….that’s a different story. They are back to the days before Jim Harbaugh and then David Shaw resurrected this program. They may just be the worst Power Five team at this point. What a fall from grace.
  3. Virginia Tech at Virginia (Week 13, Noon, specialty pack) – What happened last year at Virginia was tragic. Three players gunned down late in the season. UVA rightfully cancelled their final two games, including the Commonwealth Cup game against VaTech. Now they are back but this will not be an easy season for the Hoos, both on the field and emotionally. The Hokies are as bad as I have ever seen them be. Then again, I only mostly saw them as a Frank Beamer team. Beamerball, this is not. Look, I hate putting this game here but these two teams might be god-awful this season.
  4. Rutgers at Indiana (Week 8, Noon, Big Ten Network) – Rutgers is, unfortunately, back to being Rutgers. And Indiana without Michael Penix Jr…well we found out they were bad. Both coaches will be on the hot seat with Tom Allen in the much hotter seat for sure. The loser might not win a Big Ten game this season.
  5. Virginia at Boston College (Week 5, Noon, specialty pack) – As for non-Virginia teams in the ACC who probably won’t be going bowling, BC comes to mind. I can’t see them finding the magic formula especially with a young, relatively untested quarterback manning the ship.
  6. California at Stanford (Week 12, 9:00, Pac-12 Network) – Ah, the worst of the conference networks. What a shitshow it is. Anyway, The Big Game will be anything but big this season as I already mentioned how bad Stanford will be and I don’t know how many people outside the Cal football program care about Cal football. A shame, really.
  7. Colorado at Arizona State (Week 6, 9:00, Pac-12 Network) – Remember when ASU was the laughing stock of the Pac-12 for like a second? Everyone thought their ship was going to come crashing down. Well it did but other teams flew past them into the basement. That doesn’t mean this is some kind of comeback story, though. They still aren’t good and will be fighting for bowl eligibility. Wins in games like this are a must for that to happen.
  8. Georgia Tech at Virginia (Week 10, 3:30, specialty pack) – It feels kind of weird watching Georgia Tech play football when they aren’t running the Paul Johnson option offense. You know, I’m starting to think they never should have changed from that. Made them unique and helped them win just as often as they lost.
  9. Virginia Tech at Rutgers (Week 3, 3:30, Big Ten Network, confirmed) – Hey let’s dip into some non-con action now. I would ask who the hell scheduled a game like this but it was probably scheduled back when the Hokies played their first season in the ACC.
  10. Arizona at Stanford (Week 4, 7:00, FOX Sports One) – I have to be honest: Jedd Fisch has already exceeded my expectations for a) his coaching in Tucson and b) a guy named Jedd. This team is on the brink of getting back to postseason play for the first time in years. I will put the over/under on fans attending this game at 14,000.
  11. Arizona State at California (Week 5, 9:30, Pac-12 Network) – I am still on the record saying that there should be a pure sports-style Netflix or Amazon Prime out there. One where you can add or subtract whatever channels you want based on sport, country, etc. Would it be the death knell to cable? No but it would be quite the flesh wound. By the way, this game has some pretty good Pac-12 After Dark vibes to it and could get wacky because both teams are just not that good.
  12. Northwestern at Nebraska (Week 8, 2:30, Peacock) – I would be remiss if I didn’t include Nebraska somewhere on this list. They’ve fooled and many others over the past few years. So until they prove it, I will not take the bait. Nope, no more. I refuse to drink the Husker Koolaid.

Alright, done and dusted. A reminder that tomorrow is the end of the fiscal year for pretty much all the FBS schools. There are rumours that something on the realignment (oh god that word) front could happen by the end of the night or the very next day. Last year it was USC and UCLA to the Big Ten. Can’t see anything as big as that but you never know.

Well, I would like to wish everyone a great Canada Day weekend and Fourth of July celebration. We are less than two months away folks. Nice to be talking college football again.

It’s about that time…time for a post about nothing (kind of)

OK more like a bunch of little somethings but really they don’t all amount to much (don’t get mad at me for that comment).

The plethora of college football posts (and NFL posts) coming from yours truly are coming soon and they will come in hot and heavy. Until that time (which is still a few weeks away) I figured I should fill the time with another post. But what to post about? How about all sorts of other football-related stuff that doesn’t really warrant a full post. Maybe I can even dip back to the time when I said I should become football commissioner (still waiting for the call from….well, I don’t know since that whole thing doesn’t exist).

I know this isn’t the current XFL logo but whatever. Actually, I could have just put a pic of The Rock and you would know exactly what I was going to talk about.

I have to admit…the XFL was pretty fun to watch most of the time. Sure there were times you could tell this wasn’t NFL caliber (and maybe not even FBS caliber) but it’s minor league football and you had to expect some growing pains. They had a good TV contract although sometimes it was tough to figure out where and when the games were on. And you had the Beer Snake in D.C. How can you beat that?

I will say most of the franchises did OK. Well enough to warrant another season. Two teams I wouldn’t bother with are Vegas and Orlando. Watching games in Vegas was painful. The field they played at was awful and if they can’t get Allegiant Stadium for at least one of their games, move them. I hear San Diego is clamoring for football. As for Orlando, they just didn’t draw. And the Citrus Bowl (or whatever the fuck it’s called now) is pretty damn big so it looks horrible when only 9,000 fans show up in a 65,000 seat stadium. I’d move them to a place that really has nothing much going on in terms of outdoor pro sports and see what happens. Mobile has a pretty nice sized stadium. Same with the Cramton Bowl in Montgomery. Hell, almost anywhere in Alabama (or even Mississippi) might work. Or…..send them to Kibbie Dome. Guaranteed sellouts!

Now there is no plans to expand which is probably a good thing. Especially since the USFL looks like it will return, despite the fact it looks completely bush league. I get the telecast quality is good but that’s all the networks (and the USFL has a good set of TV contracts). The empty seats are SERIOUSLY jarring to the eyes. Next year will be the true prove-it year: all teams will play in their home stadiums. If they can’t draw at that point then they might shut its doors. At that point, that’s when the XFL should seriously look at expanding and becoming the true minor league of football.

The CFL season is almost upon us. Well, the preseason has started but you know my thoughts on preseason anything. Hell, I looked at getting preseason Buffalo Bills tickets since it used to be a cheap way to watch an NFL game live. Nope. Not anymore. I just can’t justify paying these ticket prices for a lot of things. Maybe that’s just another way of saying I’m poor. Anyway, opening day is June 8th, right around the corner.

So let’s see if the CFL has even remotely decided to look at some of my ideas to make the CFL better. Eliminating the rouge on punts? Nope. Getting rid of the salary cap? Sounds like a few teams are over, including the fucking Ottawa Redblacks. How? How are you that bad and over any salary cap in any league? They should fire everyone in the front office. Everyone. Even the janitor. Expansion? Well, Schooners Sports and Entertainment has, for now, abandoned their journey to bring a CFL team to the East coast. Which means we are back to square one. And I am sure they won’t even look into American expansion despite the fact they should.

One more thing that should happen but won’t: they need to get a game every week on a network that is not TSN. Sure, TSN, for a few years, basically propped up the league. But now, it is sometimes painful to watch a TSN telecast of a CFL game. Why not go back to CBC? Or try something new. CTV? I know they showed the CFN games back in the day but maybe see what they can provide. Global? That would be crazy but hey, maybe it would work. Omni? No. Let’s not get stupid here.

Anyway, I will watch some of the games for sure until college football and the NFL start. Then they take a back seat to both. Or more like the trunk of an SUV. You can still see them but they are far back in the car.

Simon Fraser decided to leave the Lone Star Conference and drop football. Or was it that the LSC dropped Simon Fraser and then the Clansmen/Clan/Red Leafs/Whatevers dropped football? The reality is that SFU decided against playing a lame duck football season in the Lone Star Conference and why not. Their old conference, the Great Northwest Athletic Conference, stopped sponsoring football so SFU and the two other GNAC teams remaining (Central Washington and Western Oregon) were picked up by the LSC so that they wouldn’t have to go Independent. Well unlike USC and UCLA playing in the Big Ten, these three schools really can’t afford the kind of travel that would have faced them.

What does this all have to do with U Sports? Well, some are saying SFU should start their football program up again and join the Canada West conference and get back to playing Canadian football. The athletic department seemingly wants nothing to do with it. This is upsetting the current players and many alumni. I mean these are the same alumni who probably didn’t support the team at all when they couldn’t fill a 3,000 seat stadium to watch this team when they competed at the Division II level but I digress.

The rest of Simon Fraser’s teams are still in the GNAC and seem to be comfortable there. OK, comfortable might be a stretch considering some of the issues with Simon Fraser athletics, namely the women’s soccer team being a gongshow and their athletic director sounding like a completely lazy fucker. But sure…comfortable. They really don’t want to move those teams unless they have to. I do believe, though, that SFU would be a good fit for the CWUAA and it’s never a bad thing to have another football program in U Sports since it’s not like there are a ton of them.

Are we sneaking up on a smidge of realignment or getting on a fucking jet on flying at supersonic speed and slamming straight into realignment armageddon? I guess it depends on who you listen to. Some say we may see a bit of movement over the next year or two but that nothing major will happen to close to the end of this decade at the earliest. Then there are others who have the Pac-12 completely collapsing and college football heading towards a Power 2 of the SEC and the Big Ten with a third conference holding the majority of the rest of the current power conference teams. Me? I just want the damn season to start.

Well now that much of the first three weeks of the schedule has come out for college football (and parts of the rest of the schedule), I can start piecing everything together and doing the normal posts that I started doing last year. Long posts but chock-full of great info. We are 86 days away from the start of the college football season. Soon enough it will be here but don’t waste your summer counting down the days…or do. I don’t care, do what you want. Have a great rest of the week!

Realignment: One of college football’s dirtiest words

Realignment. It excites and infuriates people. It has changed college football (and college basketball) forever. Money rules the day as some of these conferences don’t even make sense anymore. The Big Ten will soon have sixteen teams with two of them based in California: thousands of miles away from all the other teams in the conference. The SEC will have sixteen teams and, sorry, Texas, Texas A&M, Oklahoma and Missouri really don’t qualify as “Southeastern” unless you are terrible at geography. Don’t even get me started on how the Sun Belt and Conference USA have bungled realignment in the past. At least the Sun Belt a) has Fun Belt football and b) acquired some good programs. Something Conference USA just hasn’t figured out.

I figured, since I’m bored and there’s not a ton to post about and we are about to go into the football dead season (don’t say XFL or USFL), I would make this post on realignment. Don’t run away! I plan to look at realignment the way I would have had it done or what I thought would have made sense. I’m not going to put Texas State in the SEC or anything stupid like that but I will take a thoughtful look at what has happened and what I think should have happened. In some cases, they may be the same! Let’s get started before I regret doing this.

Now I don’t plan on going back to 1962 and say “Well, the Border Conference never should have been disbanded.” Before my time so I don’t really care. I also won’t say the Georgia Tech or Tulane shouldn’t have left the SEC. Of course they shouldn’t have. But they were going to at some point, be it in the mid-60s or even in the 80s. It was going to happen. I will start with a year that is not paramount at all in the minds of realignmentheads but will contain something from earlier in the 80s that many know about…

(WARNING: This will be a very, very long post so strap in.)

1987

Wichita State drops football for good. Akron moves up from Division 1-AA (remember that?) to be an Independent. Nothing big. Oh wait…

Hey, remember the Big East? In football? OK it wasn’t a thing in 1987 but the conference had been formed back in 1979. In ’82, Penn State applied for membership. Georgetown, St. John’s and Villanova voted against the Nittany Lions joining. This would have been on that Freezing Cold Takes Twitter account if it Twitter existed like 30 years ago. If I had been in charge, I would have made sure at least one of those schools changed their vote to include Penn State. And instead of waiting until the 90s, I would have started Big East football in 1987 because why the hell not. So nine Independent schools would form this new conference:

  • Penn State, Syracuse, Rutgers, Boston College, Pittsburgh, Miami, Temple, Virginia Tech and West Virginia

Way to go Georgetown, St. John’s and Villanova. Idiots. Also, this means Penn State doesn’t move to the Big Ten in the early 90s.

1989

Louisiana Tech moves up from 1-AA to 1-A as an Independent. Also, SMU returns from the death penalty that, in hindsight, was a terrible move. Either go after more of the schools that had issues (like the entire Southwest Conference) or just ban SMU from bowl games for a bunch of years. What they did set SMU football (and only SMU football) back 20 years. Notice how they have never done it again in football despite the fact they could have easily done it on a few occasions? That’s why.

1991

In one of the biggest moves at the time, Florida State joins the ACC.

1992

Look, I get it. The Southwest Conference was a complete mess for most of its existence. Sure, they had some great football teams but more often than not they were mired in some sort of scandal.

Saying that, I would have done my darndest to keep Arkansas in the SWC. And I wouldn’t have stopped there. Rice, sorry, you gone. There’s no reason to keep you around since you’re terrible in football and not much better in basketball. Yes, it’s one of the top academic schools in the nation and no, I don’t care. They can become an Independent. So at this point, the SWC would look like this:

  • Arkansas, Baylor, Texas, Texas A&M, SMU, TCU, Texas Tech, Houston

That’s still a good, competitive conference at this point.

South Carolina, on the other hand, does join the SEC, moving that conference to a somewhat awkward eleven teams. Akron moves to the MAC. Fresno State goes from the Big West to the WAC and Long Beach State drops their football program altogether. To replace LBSU and Fresno, Nevada moves up from 1-AA to 1-A and the Big West. Finally, Arkansas State also moves up from Division 1-AA to Division 1-A as an Independent.

1993

Penn State DOESN’T join the Big Ten since they are part of a better Big East (in my opinion). Cal State-Fullerton becomes the second Big West team in as many years to drop football altogether. Because of this, the Big West went on an invitation spree, bringing in Arkansas State, Louisiana Tech, Northern Illinois and Southwestern Louisiana (which is now just Louisiana), meaning they really had forgot about the West part of their conference name.

1994

Northeast Louisiana moves up from Division 1-AA to 1-A. They are now called ULM. Ho hum.

1995

Another almost-nothing year. North Texas moves to 1-A. Big whoop.

1996

This was a huge year in realignment as the Big XII came into existence, with the Big Eight absorbing four programs from the Southwest Conference. I wouldn’t go that route. I think it would be the reverse. The Southwest Conference keeps their name and absorbs all eight of the Big 8 schools. The new sixteen-team conference would be huge. I just hope they don’t go to pod scheduling. Wait, I’m running things. So no, they won’t go that route. Anywhere from two-to-four yearly opponents with the rest being filled in based on order of finish the previous season, like it should be almost everywhere.

Now, because of this, Conference USA loses one member, Houston. With some foresight, they should have kept the other five teams they had and added Rice, Tulsa, Louisiana Tech (from the Big West) and North Texas. This would give this conference the following:

  • Cincinnati, Louisiana Tech, Louisville, Memphis, North Texas, Rice, Southern Miss, Tulane, Tulsa

That’s a pretty good start for a new mid-major conference in football.

The WAC also has to change. See, they now don’t get Rice, SMU, TCU or Tulsa. So time to pick up some other teams. Time to basically fuck the Big West over. Bring in Nevada, Utah State, UNLV and New Mexico State. This would give the conference the following teams:

  • BYU, Utah, New Mexico, UTEP, Wyoming, San Diego State, Colorado State, Air Force, Fresno State, San Jose State, Hawaii, UNLV, Nevada, Utah State

That’s a lot of realignment and we aren’t even done yet. The Big West is pretty much ravaged by what the WAC did. Boise State and Idaho move up from 1-AA to 1-A to replace some of the teams but Pacific drops football altogether. The Big West sticks at six teams as Northern Illinois stays in the conference rather than going back to Independent status. Same with Louisiana and Arkansas State although it’s obvious the Big West is on its last legs as a football conference.

Finally, UCF and UAB move from Division 1-AA to 1-A as Independents.

1997

The MAC only gets Northern Illinois (from the Big West) as I would have Marshall head to Conference USA along with East Carolina.

With only five teams remaining, the Big West Conference is dead as it pertains to football. Boise State and San Jose State are invited to the WAC, while the other three teams (Arkansas State, Idaho and Louisiana) become Independents.

1998

Army does not join Conference USA. We all know how that worked out and even at the time, a lot of people thought it was a bad idea.

1999

Yeah sure why not. Let’s form the Mountain West. Arkansas State might as well stay Independent for now. The Big West doesn’t exist and there’s no reason for them to head to the WAC. Buffalo moves up from 1-AA right into the MAC. Middle Tennessee also moves up but as an Independent. Idaho moves into the WAC. Finally, UAB finds a conference home as they head to Conference USA.

2000

Two fairly benign moves: USF and UConn join the Division 1-A Independents from Division 1-AA.

2001

The Big West died (in football) and the Sun Belt started sponsoring football. Thing is, I eliminated the Big West five years ago. So Idaho and New Mexico State, now in the WAC, will not move to the Sun Belt because they don’t have to. Also, Utah State can stay in the WAC now. So the Sun Belt would comprise of Arkansas State, Louisiana, ULM, Middle Tennessee and North Texas, who moves from Conference USA. They bring in Troy State so the Trojans aren’t an Independent.

2002

Another skipped move: UCF just doesn’t bother joining the MAC because it’s the fucking MAC and they don’t need a team in Florida. Instead they just move to Conference USA a year early.

2003

Utah State doesn’t move to the Sun Belt because WHY? They are in the WAC and they can stay there. USF does, however, move. They head to Conference USA to join brother UCF.

2004

Oh baby here we go. Miami and Virginia Tech will NOT be moving to the ACC! They will stay in the Big East as UConn joins. I mean we don’t get ACC Coastal Chaos but I think we can live without it.

Florida Atlantic and Florida International transition up from Division 1-AA to Independent status.

2005

This leads us to the next year where Boston College also doesn’t leave for the ACC. And with Cincinnati, Louisville and USF joining the Big East, it is becoming quite the conference. TCU doesn’t go to the Mountain West because they are already in the Southwest Conference which has weathered the storm until now. SMU also stays in the SWC and doesn’t move to Conference USA. UTEP does move from the WAC to Conference USA as it makes a bit more sense for them. FAU and FIU, one year after joining Division 1-A, move to the Sun Belt Conference. Finally, Temple does not get dropped from the Big East despite their terrible football program. I’m doing a lot of nothing with this which I am sure people will find actually refreshing. I’m sure that will change soon.

2008

WKU joins Division 1-A. I’m just going to put them right in the Sun Belt.

2011

Things were quiet for almost six years. Then the big bang hit in college football and everything went haywire went it came to the conferences and realignment. Will this be the same in Bossman’s Realignmentpalooza? No.

First off, Nebraska does leave for the Big Ten. Since Penn State never went to the Big Ten back in the 90s, this puts the new Big Ten at eleven teams. To make it even, they also invite KANSAS! Yes, I am serious. Kansas wasn’t too far from a few seasons of great football. And their basketball team was awesome as always. So this makes a lot of sense.

As for the Pac-10, they decided they wanted to bring in six schools from the Big XII. Instead, they will bring in those same six schools from the SWC: Colorado, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Texas, Texas A&M and Texas Tech. This also means Utah does not join the now Pac-16 conference.

The SWC is now down to eight schools and, chances are, would lose their automatic BCS bowl bid. With a roster of Baylor, Iowa State, Kansas State, Missouri, TCU, Houston, SMU and Arkansas they can’t make a claim to be worthy of one now. And because of that, Arkansas finally accepts the SEC’s overtures and heads there, dropping the SWC to a seven-team conference.

The trickle down effect was in play. Utah stayed in the Mountain West and was joined by Boise State. BYU also doesn’t leave the Mountain West for Independence at this point.

2012

Another crazy year in realignment that won’t be as crazy when I’m done with it. First off, Texas A&M won’t move to the SEC since they are happy in the somewhat new Pac-16. West Virginia also doesn’t move to the SWC since it would be even more ridiculous than their current move there is (although with Cincinnati in the fold it now makes more sense). Fresno State, Hawaii and Nevada leave the WAC for the Mountain West as it happened in real life. This leaves the WAC with four teams (New Mexico State, San Jose State, Idaho and Utah State). Texas State and UTSA joined to make six. For now, this leaves the WAC as a football conference…but barely.

Oh and Missouri does not go the SEC. I still believe this makes absolutely no sense. For now they stay in the SWC but it won’t be for long.

South Alabama moves up from an FCS Independent right to the Sun Belt conference.

Finally, UMass does not join the MAC. Another weird move by the MAC that doesn’t make sense now and didn’t back then.

2013

First of all, no American Conference. It’s still the Big East. If the basketball schools don’t like it, they can fuck off for the Patriot League or whatever. Also, Pitt and Syracuse do not leave the Big East for the ACC.

Now this becomes an issue because some schools were slated to head to the new American Conference. This is how I would plan to deal with this. Houston and SMU, instead of going to the AAC, stay in the Southwest Conference. They are joined by Memphis, who leaves C-USA for the SWC.

Remember TCU, Boise State and San Diego State heading to the Big East/American? I don’t see that happening now. Instead, Boise State and San Diego State head to the SWC.

San Jose State and Utah State put the final nail in the WAC football coffin by accepting bids to the Mountain West. Idaho and New Mexico State are, once again, Independent teams. Texas State heads to the Sun Belt with UTSA going to Conference USA.

UCF heads to the Big East (not American). Then Conference USA raids the Sun Belt for four teams: FAU, FIU, Middle Tennessee and North Texas. Finally, the Sun Belt reloads, kind of, by accepting Georgia State from FCS.

2014

Louisville does decide to leave the Big East for the ACC. A bit surprising but I feel they belong there a bit better than the Big East.

I know the Big Ten wants to expand into new markets. But it won’t be happening in New York and Washington as Rutgers and Maryland do not leave their current conferences. They’ve been outliers since they moved there so I want to rectify that issue.

East Carolina heads to the Big East. An odd fit but between that and Conference USA, no one conference is a perfect fit for them so might as well move them up, so to speak. Tulane and Tulsa, on the other hand, do not go to the Big East. They head to the SWC, which is finally renamed the Big XII.

Conference USA backfills their losses with WKU from the Sun Belt and Old Dominion from FCS. After that, Appalachian State and Georgia Southern head to the Sun Belt from the FCS. Idaho and New Mexico State stay right where they are as Independents.

2015

The big happening in 2015 was UAB shuttering their football program. I am here to say it won’t happen! I don’t know how I would make that happen but I’ll figure something out.

Navy joins the Big East, ending over 100 years of Independent football and Charlotte transitions to FBS by joining Conference USA.

2017

One item: Coastal Carolina joins the Sun Belt from FCS.

2018

Poor Idaho. You would have thought they could have stayed up in FBS but it wasn’t to be. The Mountain West, the one conference it made sense for them to be in, didn’t want them. And the Sun Belt, which had them in reality for a few years, might as well have been on the moon compared to where they were situated. So they are gone to FCS, probably never to return.

In actuality, Liberty replaced them as an Independent. I’m just moving them straight to Conference USA instead. Take out the middle man.

2021

I’m not including any COVID-related moves like Notre Dame being in the ACC for one season (and almost winning the conference title).

UConn left the American to go back to the basketball-oriented Big East. In my world, that doesn’t happen. Actually, nothing happens at all here because the next year, the realignment bubble doesn’t burst: it gets blown up. So I have to put new pieces together in a brand new puzzle to make it work. Should be fun right?

2022

Who’s idea was this? Good lord. At least now we can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

This season had some movement but at the low end of FBS. James Madison, an FCS powerhouse, finally moved up to FBS and joined the Sun Belt. Joining them would be three Conference USA teams: Marshall, Old Dominion and Southern Miss.

Now, if you have read my blog before, you know how I feel about the Sun Belt and Conference USA. I find them to be unwieldy conferences with massive geographical footprints that, especially in C-USA’s case, make no sense. I plan on fixing it but not this year. Let the new teams breathe in their new conference before I blow things up with enough C-4 to level a city.

2023

Alright, let’s blow shit up.

Let’s start with the SEC which has been left behind a bit in my version of realignment. Consistency was the name of the game in the conference where it just means more. Well now they get the infusion they always hoped for. Sorry ACC. Sorry Big East. It was bound to happen. The SEC invites Florida State, Miami, Georgia Tech and Clemson. They finally have attained that superconference status.

The ACC is gutted but won’t be for long. We will get to that in a bit.

The Big XII gets an infusion of teams as well. BYU, from the Mountain West, along with Cincinnati and UCF from the Big East, move to the Big XII. Because Houston was already in the Big XII, they now sit at fifteen teams. Not the best idea, especially for scheduling purposes. So they invite one more team: Utah. After missing out on the Pac-10/12/16/whatever years ago, they finally get into a power conference and deservedly so.

Hey remember what I said way back at the start. You know, the point about Penn State not going to the Big Ten. Well, it’s time they moved. With the Big East losing some teams and some conference strength, it’s time for the Nittany Lions to move up. They will bring with them Pittsburgh. Sure it’s not a brand new market but it gives PSU a travel partner and doesn’t go too far outside the current Big Ten geographic footprint, something I find important (although college sports most definitely does not).

New Mexico State gets a conference home again when they move to Conference USA. They are joined by Sam Houston and Jacksonville State who move up from FCS.

Done for this coming season but wait, there’s more!

2024

You really think I would have USC and UCLA go to the Big Ten? Fuck that noise. What I will be doing, however, is rather seismic.

The ACC is going to raid the Big East yet again. With only seven teams for the 2023 season, they were looking like a sorry-ass football conference. So they take Boston College, Rutgers, Syracuse, UConn, Virginia Tech and West Virginia from the Big East. I’m not a fan of odd-numbered conferences, so they also pluck UCF from the Big XII.

Now we start the trickle-down effect. The Big XII (now Big XVI) will take Colorado State from the Mountain West. The Mountain West responds by grabbing New Mexico State from Conference USA.

And then, the coup de grace. I am going to totally remake Conference USA and the Sun Belt and finally put the nail in the coffin of Big East football, all in one fell swoop. This is how it will work (pay close attention):

  • Conference USA will be the western-most conference of the two with the Sun Belt being the eastern-most. Why did I do this? Who knows.
  • All four former Big East teams (East Carolina, Navy, Temple and USF) join the Sun Belt.
  • Arkansas State, Louisiana, South Alabama, Southern Miss, Texas State, Troy and ULM move from the Sun Belt to Conference USA.
  • Then Charlotte, FAU, FIU, Liberty and WKU move from Conference USA to the Sun Belt.

Look at that; two sixteen-team conferences that have a tighter geographic footprint. Makes travel easier and fosters better rivalries. Like college sports had been like for DECADES. Oh and if Louisiana Tech complains even once about being in the same conference as Louisiana or ULM they can be sent to FCS for all I care.

Alright, so now I bet you want to know what this all looks like. So here it is, in chart form with NO DIVISONS because divisions suck:

SECBig TenPac-16ACCBig XVI
AlabamaIllinoisArizonaBoston CollegeBaylor
ArkansasIndianaArizona StateDukeBoise State
AuburnIowaCaliforniaLouisvilleBYU
ClemsonKansasColoradoMarylandCincinnati
FloridaMichiganOklahomaNC StateColorado State
Florida StateMichigan StateOklahoma StateNorth CarolinaHouston
GeorgiaMinnesotaOregonRutgersIowa State
Georgia TechNebraskaOregon StateSyracuseKansas State
KentuckyNorthwesternStanfordUCFMemphis
LSUOhio StateTexasUConnMissouri
MiamiPenn StateTexas A&MVirginiaSan Diego State
Mississippi StatePittsburghTexas TechVirginia TechSMU
Ole MissPurdueUCLAWake ForestTCU
South CarolinaWisconsinUSCWest VirginiaTulane
TennesseeWashingtonTulsa
VanderbiltWashington StateUtah
Mountain WestMACSun BeltConference USAIndependents
Air ForceAkronAppalachian StateArkansas StateArmy
Fresno StateBall StateCharlotteJacksonville StateNotre Dame
HawaiiBowling GreenCoastal CarolinaLouisianaUMass
NevadaBuffaloEast CarolinaLouisiana Tech
New MexicoCentral MichiganFAUMiddle Tennessee
New Mexico StateEastern MichiganFIUNorth Texas
San Jose StateKent StateGeorgia SouthernRice
UNLVMiami-OHGeorgia StateSam Houston
Utah StateNorthern IllinoisJames MadisonSouth Alabama
WyomingOhioLibertySouthern Miss
ToledoMarshallTexas State
Western MichiganNavyTroy
Old DominionUAB
TempleULM
USFUTEP
WKUUTSA

Holy crap that took forever. But look at those conferences. I think they look way better than what we will see in reality, if I do say so myself. And if another team is moving up from FCS, they may just have to be an Independent for the near future…dammit Kennesaw State is moving up in 2024? Nope, not anymore. Not in Bossman’s realignment. I’m done.

OK that’s a new one (and the Week 4 College Football TV schedule)

Hey, remember when Lane Kiffin was fired on the tarmac while at USC? Good times. Well, Herm Edwards has just done one better.

After Arizona State’s horrible loss to Eastern Michigan, he was called over to the end zone by ASU athletic director Ray Anderson and ASU president Michael Crow. They had a brief conversation with Herm nodding a few times and then he said OK a couple of times and then was escorted off the field. It seems like he was fired in the fucking end zone after the game. That is impressive. The ASU brass are not messing around with this. I am honestly surprised Herm lasted this long. I guess he didn’t play to win the game in the end.

Coaches are getting fired left and right. It’s like the coaching hot seat is trying to out do realignment. Look, let’s just get to the games and try and move most of that shit to the offseason. Agreed?

Thursday

USCanada
West Virginia at Virginia Tech7:30 PM
Coastal Carolina at Georgia State7:30 PM
Chattanooga at Illinois8:00 PM

Three games to start the week in college football. None of them super important. The best game actually might come from the Sun Belt as both Coastal and GSU are looking to somehow win the crowded East Division. The other game is between two Power Five teams who could be considered disappointing so far this year. The Mountaineers lost to Kansas and Tech lost to Old Dominion. I don’t know which loss is worse but they are both bad (as of this point). And with the NFL’s Thursday Night Football game being the Steelers and Browns, I can see not a lot of people watching any of these games (unless they are close, obviously).

Friday

USCanada
Virginia at Syracuse7:00 PM
Nevada at Air Force8:00 PM
Boise State at UTEP9:00 PM

This is better than Thursday night’s sked for sure. At least here there is a team that should be ranked in Syracuse. They could be 4-0 if they can beat the Cavaliers which would feel crazy but there are always a few teams that surprise everyone and the Orange are definitely one of them. As for the other games, does anyone want to win the Mountain West Mountain Division? Boise State has looked poor and Air Force laid an egg against Wyoming last week. Utah State got destroyed by an FCS school and New Mexico and Colorado State have been predictably below-average. Maybe Wyoming is the team to beat in the division, who knows?

Saturday Early

USCanada
#5 Clemson at #21 Wake ForestNoon
Rhode Island at #24 PittsburghNoon
Central Michigan at #14 Penn StateNoon
Buffalo at Eastern MichiganNoon
Missouri at AuburnNoon
#17 Baylor at Iowa StateNoon
TCU at SMUNoon
Maryland at #4 MichiganNoon
Duke at KansasNoon
Bowling Green at Mississippi StateNoon

The best early slate so far this season by a country mile. Clemson and Wake Forest square off in the first round of the ACC Atlantic round-robin, that will eventually include Florida State, NC State and possibly even Syracuse. I still believe College Gameday should have gone to Lawrence for Duke against Kansas. That would have been wild. Both teams are undefeated. I don’t want to guarantee that the winner will be ranked but they should be. Also, I am sure Nebraska is watching the Baylor-ISU game closely as Matt Campbell is one of their coaching targets, along with Mark Stoops and Gary Patterson. No, Urban Meyer is not going to coach the Huskers.

Saturday Afternoon

USCanada
UCLA at Colorado2:00 PM
Notre Dame at North Carolina3:30 PM
Middle Tennessee at #25 Miami3:30 PM
Minnesota at Michigan State3:30 PM
#20 Florida at #11 Tennessee3:30 PM
FIU at WKU3:30 PM
#22 Texas at Texas Tech3:30 PM
Indiana at Cincinnati3:30 PM
Toledo at San Diego State3:30 PM
Georgia Tech at UCF4:00 PM
#15 Oregon at Washington State4:00 PM
Tulsa at #16 Ole Miss4:00 PM
Arizona at California5:30 PM

The Third Saturday in September highlights the afternoon timeslot. Too bad it’s actually the Fourth Saturday in September. Why the hell is the UF-UT rivalry even called the Third Saturday in September if you’re not going to SCHEDULE IT FOR THE THIRD SATURDAY IN SEPTEMBER? Dumb. If you had Wazzu undefeated and a challenge for Oregon, raise your hand. Now put them down because no one thought that. That could be an intriguing and close matchup on the Palouse. Somehow Cincy is favoured by more than two touchdowns against Indy. I feel a close game there. Finally, the Irish have a chance to prove that they are not going to struggle to go bowling this year although the Tar Heels are better than last season.

Saturday Primetime

USCanada
UNLV at Utah State7:00 PM
#10 Arkansas vs. #23 Texas A&M (in Arlington)7:00 PM
Northern Illinois at #8 Kentucky7:00 PM
Iowa at Rutgers7:00 PM
Marshall at Troy7:00 PM
Wisconsin at #3 Ohio State7:30 PM
Miami-OH at Northwestern7:30 PM
Florida Atlantic at Purdue7:30 PM
Charlotte at South Carolina7:30 PM
Vanderbilt at #2 Alabama7:30 PM
Boston College at Florida State8:00 PM
Kansas State at #6 Oklahoma8:00 PM

You’ll notice the only TSN game this week is here. And of course they simulcast the ABC game. Nice. TSN has President’s Cup golf and the CFL on during the afternoon so that meant college football is out earlier in the day. Oh and they also have curling and NASCAR pushing college football aside. I just wish they would do the ESPN game and not the ABC one for people that don’t have the specialty pack. Oh well. Wildcats-Sooners is always interesting as OU always seems to have trouble with KSU. And the Southwest Classic (I think that’s what it’s called) is in JerryWorld and this time both teams are ranked so the stakes are a bit higher this time around.

Saturday Late Night

USCanada
#7 USC at Oregon State9:30 PM
Wyoming at #19 BYU10:15 PM
Western Michigan at San Jose State10:30 PM
#13 Utah at Arizona State10:30 PM
Stanford at #18 Washington10:30 PM

Wow the Pac-12 Network scored a big one. Or, you could say that USC-Oregon State was somehow relegated to the Pac-12 Network. I know they are doing this so that they can get a USC conference game early in the season since they need to show at least one of every team as per the contract. Thing is, Oregon State is probably just outside the Top 25 and USC is solidly in and may be the Pac-12’s best shot at the College Football Playoff this year. So not a good look. Well, it would be OK if the Pac-12 Network was shown in more homes but it’s not.

Big Games O’ The Week

Clemson at Wake Forest (Noon, ABC) – Many thought that this would be a huge early ACC game and they are right. Clemson, despite being ranked 5th in the nation, have looked shaky at times, especially at the quarterback position. Sam Hartman has looked great returning from injury but the Wake defense has been subpar. Why this didn’t get the ABC primetime spot, oh yes…the Big Ten. Say no more.

Florida at Tennessee (3:30, CBS) – This is the Vols’ chance to prove they are…well, at least the third-best team in the SEC East. The division is improving. The Gators are better. The Gamecocks are better. Vandy is playing well. Kentucky has been lights out so far this season. It’s not the case anymore that one team dominates and the rest kind of suck.

Arkansas vs. Texas A&M (in Arlington) (7:00, specialty pack) – I don’t know if the Aggies are still stinging from the Appalachian State loss or the video that came out of their Midnight Yell practice that made fun of App State. All I know is that the swagger might be gone from this squad. Arkansas, on the other hand, survived Petrinomania last weekend in a game that shouldn’t have been as close as it was. So, really we have two teams who aren’t playing their best against each other inside a division that is still a damn juggernaut. Should be fun!

USC at Oregon State (9:30, YouTube) – The Beavers’ 3-0 start has to be shocking some people. And they’ve looked pretty good doing it. You know who has looked even better? Yep, the men of Troy. Again, I get why this game is on the Pac-12 Network but man does it suck from a visibility standpoint for the conference. No wonder USC and, at this point, UCLA are heading to the Big Ten.

Baylor at Iowa State (Noon, specialty pack) – Baylor lost once, to BYU, but has looked good otherwise. Iowa State is undefeated thanks to a sloppy game (that’s putting it mildly) beating Iowa for the CyHawk Trophy. Both teams have sights on JerryWorld in December so games like this are almost must-win. Plus, I’m sure many in the Cornhuskers athletic department will have interest in this game, as I mentioned above. If I’m Matt Campbell, I use that interest to get a bigger deal in Ames since I don’t know if I’d want to coach in Lincoln. Now if it was me, I’d take the massive contract, not give a shit, make them buy me out, and never work again but that’s just me.

Duke at Kansas (Noon, FOX Sports One) – College Gameday, you cowards. I have to lean Kansas in this one because Duke has had success in the past decade; the Jayhawks, not so much.

Psycho Game of the Week

UNLV at Utah State (7:00, CBS Sports Network) – Utah State is quite bad. Worse than pretty much anyone thought they’d be. Sure, the Rebels are a better team this season but until they become bowl-eligible, they will be considered a below-average program at best. Too many choices in the primetime schedule to this is an easy one to avoid.

Hubba Bubba Blowout of the Week

Vanderbilt at Alabama (7:30, specialty pack) – As good as the Commodores have been so far this season, this is a whole different animal. I expect the Tide to punish Vandy all night.

Fun-Time Stats of the Week

Figured I would add another section to the blog posts. Feeling generous, I am. So here we go with some stats to send you into the weekend:

  • Since the Badgers upset Ohio State in 2004, Wisconsin is 0-5 in Columbus.
  • Oklahoma has lost six Big XII games in the last decade. Three of those have been to Kansas State.
  • Cincinnati is 17-5 in non-conference games since Luke Fickell was hired as head coach.

The Degenerate Portion of Our Show

9-4 this past week against the spread. That’s quite good if I say so myself. I picked WKU to lose but cover against Indiana. Same with LSU against Mississippi State. Unfortunately I also thought BYU would do that and that game wasn’t close. Can’t win em all. OK, on to this week’s picks:

  • Virginia Tech (+1.5) over West Virginia with the outright win
  • Virginia (+9) over Syracuse (but Cuse wins)
  • Buffalo (+6) over Eastern Michigan (but EMU wins by a field goal)
  • Central Michigan (+28) over Penn State (but the Nittany Lions win fairly easily)
  • Bowling Green (+30) over Mississippi State (the Bulldogs win by about three touchdowns)
  • SMU (+2) over TCU (with an outright win)
  • WKU (-31) over FIU
  • Texas (-6.5) over Texas Tech
  • Notre Dame (+1.5) over North Carolina with the outright win
  • Washington State (+6.5) over Oregon (but UO wins a close one)
  • Marshall (-3.5) over Troy
  • Iowa (-7.5) over Rutgers
  • Wisconsin (+18.5) over Ohio State (tOSU wins but it may be closer than we think)
  • Wyoming (+22.5) over BYU (Cougs win this but it’s close)

There you go. A lot of info for ya to peruse before your viewing commences. I’m hoping for another solid weekend of college football action. It’s never good when there’s a full slate of games and by the end you feel completely underwhelmed. Hasn’t happened often but when it does it’s such an empty feeling. Anyway, enjoy the games everyone!

Alright let’s wrap this up in a nice, neat little package

Oh man did you actually believe that?  LITTLE?  Have you not noticed what I’ve been doing the last little while?  Oh this will not be a little package I assure you; but it will be an important package of information that you, the college football fan, would like to see (I hope).

So yes, you will see what I believe the College Football Playoff and the New Year’s Six will look like.  You will get bowl projections from yours truly.  You will also get my Heisman ballot which is usually a big steaming pile of horseshit.  And you will get my coaching hot seat list which, honestly, is usually pretty good if I say so myself.

Let’s get right to it with the top of the pyramid (scheme)…the College Football Playoff predictions.  You probably have a good idea from the conference predictions as to who will end up here and you also know that there is a good chance I will fail miserably with one of these picks:

December 31st Fiesta Bowl #2 Ohio State #3 Georgia
December 31st Peach Bowl #1 Alabama #4 Clemson

New Year’s Eve semi-finals.  Will they never learn?  Anyway, Bama is the easy call here as I see them running the table and then beating UGA in what may be the biggest SEC Championship ever (and that’s saying a lot).  This also means that Georgia is probably a fairly easy call as well.  Sure, they will lose to the Tide but if they go in at #2 (which I expect them to) and lose to #1 (which I assume Bama would be) then a drop to #3 is as far as they will go.  No way they are leaving out a one-loss Big Ten champ so tOSU gets in and takes advantage of one of Alabama or Georgia having to lose to get to the #2 spot.  OK take advantage is a strong phrase since being #2 means very little other than avoiding #1 until, potentially, the title game.  Clemson ends up beating out Texas A&M, Michigan and NC State, all one-loss teams who didn’t win their division, rather easily to grab the final semi-final spot.  Oregon would have their shot at the Pac-12 Championship but lose to Utah making The Committee’s job (at least for these two games) rather straightforward.

Now we will go to the New Year’s Six bowl games where, thanks to the NFL, none of them are on New Year’s Day.  Eat shit, Rose Bowl.

January 2nd Rose Bowl #6 Michigan #10 Utah
January 2nd Cotton Bowl #11 Oregon #8 Houston
December 31st Sugar Bowl #5 Texas A&M #9 Baylor
December 30th Orange Bowl #7 NC State #12 Notre Dame

As always, it’s debate time.  Every year which is fine as long as the debates devolve into some stupid Twitter spat.  Only one conference championship loser is getting in here and that’s Oregon.  They’ll be high enough in the rankings (potentially in the Top 4) going into Conference Championship weekend that there is no way they drop out of a NY6 bowl.  Houston won’t be this year’s Cincinnati but they will be this year’s Group of Five representative in the New Year’s Six and they will coast to get here.  Michigan is going to have another good year but they have the audacity to be in the same division as Ohio State.  Assholes.  This will be enough to keep them out of the CFP.  Same goes for TAMU and NC State.  What were they thinking being in a division with other good schools.  And you wonder why I hate divisions.  We could have a tOSU-UM rematch and a Clemson-NCST rematch for conference championships.  Talk about a lot more being on the line and a hell of a lot more intrigue.

Utah, with their win over Oregon in the Pac-12 Championship, gets the other Rose Bowl spot opposite Michigan.  Luckily, they should ascend to somewhere around the #10 ranking that I have them in so they will look like they belong.  Baylor also gets the benefit of a good bowl tie-in and I have them facing their old Southwest Conference foe, the Aggies of Texas A&M.  Just like Utah, the Bears will be good enough to belong here and not spark any crazy debate about bowl tie-ins.  The only debate will be for the final spot.  Look, it’s Notre Dame.  If the Irish go 10-2, they are not being left out of this group of bowl games.  As much as some of you want that to be the case, it never will be (until the CFP structure changes).  They beat out UCLA, Oklahoma and Marshall.  Very few, other than those schools’ fans, will be super upset they were left out.

Now it’s time for the rest of BOWL SZN.  At least I know these bowls won’t be cancelled…I hope.

January 2nd Citrus Bowl #17 Tennessee #18 Michigan State
January 2nd ReliaQuest Bowl Florida #20 Minnesota
December 31st Music City Bowl Ole Miss #22 Purdue
December 30th Gator Bowl Arkansas #19 Pittsburgh
December 30th Arizona Bowl Boise State Northern Illinois
December 30th Sun Bowl Louisville Oregon State
December 30th Duke’s Mayo Bowl Kentucky Penn State
December 29th Alamo Bowl #15 Oklahoma #13 UCLA
December 29th Cheez-It Bowl Iowa State Miami
December 29th Pinstripe Bowl Iowa Florida State
December 28th Texas Bowl LSU #21 Texas
December 28th Holiday Bowl Virginia Tech #24 USC
December 28th Liberty Bowl South Carolina #23 Oklahoma State
December 28th Military Bowl Wake Forest #16 UCF
December 27th Guaranteed Rate Bowl Nebraska Kansas State
December 27th Birmingham Bowl Auburn #25 Cincinnati
December 27th First Responder Bowl Colorado State Troy
December 27th Camellia Bowl Coastal Carolina UAB
December 26th Quick Lane Bowl Maryland Miami-OH
December 24th Hawaii Bowl BYU Fresno State
December 23rd Independence Bowl Memphis Army
December 23rd Gasparilla Bowl Boston College Tulsa
December 22nd Armed Forces Bowl TCU UTEP
December 21st New Orleans Bowl #14 Marshall UTSA
December 20th Boca Raton Bowl Appalachian State Florida Atlantic
December 20th Idaho Potato Bowl San Diego State Toledo
December 19th Myrtle Beach Bowl Georgia State Liberty
December 17th Frisco Bowl San Jose State South Alabama
December 17th Las Vegas Bowl Mississippi State Arizona State
December 17th LendingTree Bowl Louisiana Kent State
December 17th LA Bowl Washington Air Force
December 17th New Mexico Bowl Utah State Western Michigan
December 17th Fenway Bowl North Carolina SMU
December 16th Cure Bowl East Carolina UNLV
December 16th Bahamas Bowl WKU Central Michigan

More bowl games!  Honestly, I don’t care nearly as much as I used to.  It’s more football at this point.  Once the 12-team playoff (or whatever it ends up being) comes to fruition, I will be interested to see what happens to some of the lower-level bowl games.  Hey, as long as Canadians can see most of these games on TSN then there’s no real problem.  Let’s look at a few points from that long table of information I just posted:

  • Only two games between ranked teams?  Good lord.  UT-MSU at the Citrus and Oklahoma-UCLA at the Alamo and that’s it.  Those two bowls are used to having fairly big matchups.  It would probably be more of a shock if the Bahamas Bowl had a Top 25 matchup (although it would definitely intrigue me that’s for sure).
  • I’m not bothering with listing bowl tie-ins and or conferences that couldn’t fill their bowl quota or even 5-7 teams that I have in to fill the bowl games that don’t have two teams.
  • Some of the other good matchups after the Citrus and Alamo:
    • Ole Miss-Purdue in Nashville
    • Arkansas-Pitt at the Gator
    • Iowa-Florida State playing in the cold of the Bronx
    • Wake-UCF in the Military Bowl
    • LSU going into Longhorn country (kind of) to play Texas
    • Marshall-UTSA in Nawlins
    • Nebraska-Kansas State in a Big Eight matchup in Tempe
  • The Husker one is very interesting because they have the longest Big Ten bowl drought.  Can you fucking believe it?  I would have bet money that it was Rutgers or…Rutgers.  Nope.  The Huskers went to the Music City Bowl in late 2016 and haven’t gone back to a bowl game since.  Wow.

History states at least one of the CFP semi-final games will not be that good.  I hate to do this to the Tigers but sorry, Bama should win that one easy.  The Buckeyes will have big problems with the Dawgs but in the end, they will punch their ticket to the national title game to lose to the Tide who will be back on top once again.  No real surprises here.

So now that COVID is…well not behind us but it is not nearly as serious as it was, we can really get back to normality. That means that the college football head coaches are getting shorter leashes again, folks! The shitcanning season will be upon us at some point this Fall!

And when I mean short leashes I mean seriously short. Like maybe a foot long. Some athletic directors are now realizing that the college football world is pretty much fully back to normal and they have some time to make up. Some coaches received reprieves in the past two seasons thanks to the pandemic but that leeway is fucking gone now.

Look I don’t want to toot my own horn but I usually do fairly well with this list. So let’s just get right down to it, shall we? If you recall, the order is from most likely to be fired to most likely to keep their job. They are also categorized in a few different sections. Let’s go!

Almost Guaranteed Shitcanning

  1. Geoff Collins (Georgia Tech) – This should be a surprise to absolutely no one.  The experiment to move away from the option to more of a pro-style offense has failed spectacularly in the ATL.  I honestly see no possible improvement here and a possible in-season firing.  Needed to keep his job – Get into the final few weeks of the season with at least a mathematical possibility of going bowling.  Prediction – He’s going to get shitcanned some time in November in the midst of a ten-loss season for the Rambling Wreck.
  2. Karl Dorrell (Colorado) – Can we say that weird 2020 season was an aberration?  I think we can as the Buffaloes are dropping down the ladder once again in the Pac-12 as realignment goes wild everywhere.  Needed to keep his job – Have a shot at bowl eligibility going into the final two games.  Prediction – A whole lot of frustration for Dorrell, the Buffaloes, the other coaches, alumni and current students. And no job for Dorrell…he may end up not coaching the final game of the season.
  3. Neal Brown (West Virginia) – Brown’s first year in Morgantown was considered a success.  Last year’s, not so much.  And with an improving Big XII around them, I see them falling even farther in Brown’s third year when he has most of his recruits in.  Not looking good for a guy who was a big up-and-comer not too long ago.  Needed to keep his job – Not continue the downward slide.  Prediction – I remember going to Wet n’ Wild as a kid. It doesn’t exist anymore. But it had some cool waterslides. That is how ol’ Neal is going to feel this season. He’ll end the season on the unemployment line.
  4. Mike Bloomgren (Rice) – No one is really expecting Rice to be a power player in football.  Saying that, they had to the American Conference next season and I can’t see Bloomgren being the head coach.  Other than a couple of good seasons, he’s done very little in the Houston area and has fallen FAR behind their neighbour.  Needed to keep his job – Something more than what I feel they will do this year.  Prediction – The bloom has come off the rose (ha ha) and he will be looking for a new school to coach at for 2023.
  5. Herm Edwards (Arizona State) – It feels inevitable that, at the very best, Herm will be done at the end of the season.  Their recruiting issues are well known and it may end up being the NCAA coming down hard on ASU (and, eventually, Herm himself).  It won’t help his cause that the Sun Devils won’t be as good as they were last year.  Needed to keep his job – I don’t know if there is anything short of a Pac-12 title that would save his job (and even then).  Prediction – Herm is shown the door before the last game of the season as the powers that be in Tempe decide it’s time to rebuild again.

Probable Shitcanning

  1. Dino Babers (Syracuse) – How long has Dino been on the hot seat?  Everything was looking golden in 2018 for Babers but since then…yeesh.  I’m not saying Syracuse is a destination spot for coaching but you know things are getting tense within the athletic department with this.  Needed to keep his job – The Orange to recapture at least some of that 2018 magic.  Prediction – Dino will be a coordinator somewhere next year.
  2. Scot Loeffler (Bowling Green) – I’m sure there are times where Scotty (Scoty?) would love to be back at any of the schools he used to be at.  This is his first head coaching gig and it has been a rough one to be honest.  Even though Bowling Green isn’t exactly a hotspot in college football, at some point the athletic director will be done with the team not performing.  7-22 isn’t exactly the type of record that keeps a job.  Needed to keep his job – 4 or 5 wins and look competitive inside the MAC.  Prediction – Double-digit losses and a pink slip.
  3. Danny Gonzales (New Mexico) – Speaking of tough places to coach, here are the Lobos looking at potentially another coaching change on the horizon.  Definitely a spot a younger coach in the West would maybe take a shot at.  Beware though: the last time UNM won at least ten games was four decades ago.  Unfortunately between them and NMSU, the state is a dead spot for college football.  Needed to keep his job – Close to bowl eligibility.  Prediction – Three wins and a tough decision to be made from the higher ups.

Possible Shitcanning

  1. Seth Littrell (North Texas) – Littrell hasn’t done bad in Denton.  Five bowls in his six seasons there is pretty darn good for a team in Conference USA.  Problem is he has lost every single one.  It truly does feel like they are kind of stuck in the middle of the conference and that’s getting some people antsy.  Needed to keep his job – At least 5 wins and competing for bowl eligibility near the end of the season.  Prediction – That’s exactly where I have the Mean Green. I think he probably survives the season but the leash will be extremely short going forward.
  2. Bryan Harsin (Auburn) – This was considered a coup when the Tigers plucked him from Boise State.  His first season on the Plains was…rocky to put it mildly.  There was an attempt to get him ousted after last season ended.  Obviously it didn’t work but there are some thinking maybe he just doesn’t fit at Auburn (or the SEC for that matter).  Needed to keep his job – A winning record and better recruiting.  Prediction – I got the Tigers winning 7 to stay out of the basement of the SEC West. That should be enough to save him at least into ‘crootin season. That’s where he needs to improve or otherwise he may not see the 2023 season on the field at Jordan-Hare.
  3. Ken Niumatalolo (Navy) – It is tough putting Ken on this list, I’m not going to lie.  Problem is, Navy has been pretty bad for three of the past four seasons.  That 2019 season where they won 11 games seems like a fluke, almost.  I’m sure it would take a lot to fire Niumatalolo but another season like the previous two and who knows.  Needed to keep his job – At least 6 wins.  Prediction – I have the Middies only winning three so this could be a very interesting offseason in Annapolis.
  4. Terry Bowden (ULM) – I might get some flak for this one.  I know he’s only been in Monroe for a season.  I do think this year the Warhawks are going to be one of the worst teams in the FBS. Maybe there is someone on his staff who will take over for him next year so that ULM brass will feel OK to fire him? I don’t know but this doesn’t seem to be leading anywhere in a much-improved Sun Belt Conference.  Needed to keep his job – Improvement from the previous season.  Prediction – As I said, they won’t be good. I have them predicted at 1-11. I can see this being done relatively quietly in the offseason (Terry’s shitcanning that is).
  5. Rick Stockstill (Middle Tennessee) – Stockstill has been at Middle for what seems like forever.  And it doesn’t feel like anything would happen because of that.  Saying that, the Blue Raiders need to do something since they have been mediocre most of the last few seasons. They also turned down a (possible?) invitation to the MAC so this is their chance to become the best of a not-so-good bunch. Will Rick lead them through that though?  Needed to keep his job – Got to be bowl eligibility really.  Prediction – I got MTSU winning 5 games which will make for some very interesting offseason chatter in Murfreesboro.
  6. Greg Schiano (Rutgers) – This isn’t the Schiano that went 56-33 in his final seven seasons during his first run in Piscataway.  That was in the Big East and Rutgers is…well, they definitely aren’t in a conference like that anymore.  Still, fans were hoping for something a bit more from a guy who runs blitzes during kneel down plays.  Unfortunately, I think this won’t be that year.  Needed to keep his job – Real bowl eligibility, not the 5-7 you are a smart school kind.  Prediction – I have the Scarlet Knights regressing a bit this year. Whether Schiano returns has a lot to do with whether they think they’ve truly bottomed out and if they believe they can get a good coach in.
  7. Jake Spavital (Texas State) – Has anyone ever expected the Bobcats to do anything of significance on the football field? Really, that lack of winning culture could be the one thing that gives Spavital one more season at the helm. Needed to keep his job – 5 wins and some meaningful November football. Prediction – 4 wins and a short leash into 2023.

Doubtful Shitcanning (although it still could happen)

  1. Jeff Scott (USF) – Not a whole lot has gone well for the former Clemson coordinator down in Tampa.  Remember when the Bulls were #2 in the nation?  Not even Pepperidge Farms remembers that I don’t think.  What it does say, though, is that you can win at this school.  Now it’s just a matter of how long the USF athletic department will give Scott to truly turn things around.  Needed to keep his job – Stay out of the American Conference basement.  Prediction – They aren’t going to a bowl game but expect them to win around four games and be quite clear of the bottom rung of the AAC.
  2. Scott Frost (Nebraska) – It has become a difficult job to recruit players to Lincoln.  I think Frost has finally figured it out and the Huskers, at the very least, should be back bowling this season. Now watch them completely tank.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl-eligibility at the very least.  Prediction – No Kool-Aid this time but I have the Huskers winning eight games. Don’t laugh.
  3. David Shaw (Stanford) – I remember when Shaw was getting Stanford to bowl games and contending in the Pac-12 on a consistent basis.  Make no bones about it, he’s still a great head coach.  Give him time and he will have the Cardinal back on top of what will be the Pac-10 going forward.  Needed to keep his job –  Look better than the 2021 season.  Prediction – I have Stanford winning 4 games but the bottom of the Pac-12 North is crowded so an upset or two isn’t out of the realm of possibility for this team. Shaw is safe for another season at the very least.
  4. Mike Norvell (Florida State) – Things are finally looking up in Tallahassee.  For real this time. It would have to get really bad for the Noles this season for Norvell to be let go.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility at the very least.  Prediction – Eight wins and a new lease on life. Teams won’t have it easy against this team this season.
  5. Tom Allen (Indiana) – I would put Tom farther up this list as Indiana was BAD last year and won’t be a whole lot better this season.  Thing is, his buyout is huge so unless the Hoosiers absolutely have to fire him, he won’t be let go.  Needed to keep his job – Don’t do something illegal or unethical.  Prediction – Other than punching the coach of the opposing team, I can’t see Allen doing anything bad. Yes I only have them winning three games this season but that doesn’t really matter here in the grand scheme of things.

One of these days I have to go back and see how truly successful I have been at this hot seat list. I still think the numbers will back me up.

Now from a normally good section (for me) to a notoriously horrible section (for me). My Heisman ballot is back. And I don’t know if it can be any worse than what I have done for the past few years. But, I always give it my all so here’s another edition of Bossman’s Heisman Trophy Ballot If He Got a Vote (which he most certainly should not):

My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Heisman Ballot

  1. C.J. Stroud, Ohio State – Last year’s ballot was horrifically bad but I did have Stroud in at #4 (and Bryce Young at #5).  So it wasn’t all bad (but mostly it was).  I have the Buckeyes getting to the National Championship and he will be the main reason why. It will be a close race this year, I believe, but Stroud will put up the numbers and get the big victories that put him over the top.
  2. Bryce Young, Alabama – Yes, I do have the Tide winning the national title this year.  It still won’t be enough to not join the list of players who had a shot at pulling an Archie Griffin and came up short.  Unlike everyone else on the list, he won’t make it easy on the other contenders. The only thing holding him back is how many other Heisman candidates this team has. They are loaded.
  3. Caleb Williams, USC – It was a huge coup for Lincoln Riley to convince Williams to follow him from Oklahoma to USC.  Among the contenders, Williams may have the toughest job helping turn around a 4-8 team so quickly.  This is one of the few instances where a team only being so good might end up costing a player during a Heisman campaign.
  4. Will Anderson Jr., Alabama – I believe Anderson is the best defensive player in the country and it’s really not even close.  He’s also one small part of the reason that I think Bryce Young won’t win the Heisman.  He will take some of the votes that would have been thrown Young’s way.  It could work in reverse as well. Anderson could be primed to be the first defensive player in a long time to win the Heisman Trophy but all the good Bama players, including Young, makes it a bit more difficult for him.
  5. D.J. Uiagalelei, Clemson – Should we try this again? Why not.  *clears throat*  Ahem…Oo-ee-un-guh-luh-lay.  Just like last year.  And just like last year I have him #5 in my Heisman rankings.  He will have to show some serious improvement and I am betting he will.  It will help that he will have a better team around him that will be competing fort he College Football Playoff.  I think we will have a good idea what kind of season he will have once September ends.
  6. Tyler Van Dyke, Miami – This guy looked like the real deal down the stretch last season and could have been considered the best ACC player the last few weeks of the regular season.  The Canes will be better but, as per usual, doing better will help a lot. If the Canes can somehow win the ACC title, Van Dyke’s chances might soar.
  7. Dillon Gabriel, Oklahoma – A fantastic quarterback at UCF.  And thanks to TransferPortalMania, he ends up in Norman, replacing Caleb Williams (and, sure, Spencer Rattler).  Being the quarterback for the Sooners is always a pressure situation but the pressure should be a lot less this season which may allow Gabriel to thrive.
  8. Bijan Robinson, Texas – Running backs still get shafted, to an extent, when it comes to Heisman voting.  It takes a phenomenal year for one to win it and you have to pair it with no outstanding quarterbacks.  An uphill battle for sure.  But if there’s one running back who could break through this season, it could be the new king of dijon mustard, Bijan Robinson. He will be the guy who makes the Texas offense go so if they win even 9 games this year, look for him to get a lot of attention from voters.
  9. Jaxon Smith-Njigba, Ohio State – Hey, how about the guy who had a breakout game for the ages at the Rose Bowl?  He will have arguably the best quarterback in the country throwing to him.  As we know, that’s a plus and a minus when it comes to the Heisman.  At the very least, he is the highest rated receiver coming into the season so that counts for something.
  10. Hendon Hooker, Tennessee – This may feel to some like an out-of-nowhere kind of pick.  Hooker showed what he could do running a decent Vols offense.  With Tennessee having a lot more talent on that side of the ball this season, he may have some crazy stats. If Tennessee somehow gets to a New Year’s Six bowl, he will get a ton of hype.

Honourable Mention

  • TreVeyon Henderson, Ohio State
  • Jahmyr Gibbs, Alabama
  • Braelon Allen, Wisconsin
  • Jaxson Dart, Ole Miss
  • Quinn Ewers, Texas
  • Spencer Rattler, South Carolina
  • Grayson McCall, Coastal Carolina
  • Jordan Addison, USC
  • Devin Leary, NC State

I am going to wish the players on this list good luck since there is a chance the winner is nowhere to be found here. Because I am terrible at this.

All the predictions I have are now complete! In about five months or so I will find out how poorly I did.

Next up will be…hold on let me check my notes…yes….YES……YEEEEEES! College football is back! Week Zero! I mean it’s just Week Zero but still….WEEK ZERO! I will have the schedule up at some point early in the week. I’ve already been asked about the specialty packs as it pertains to this coming Saturday. My guess is they won’t show anything since normally they don’t because…who knows but I will chalk it up to some sort of incompetence since what they (Bell and Rogers) tell me makes no sense. I will keep everyone updated. Have a great rest of the weekend everyone!

Power Five….Power Four? Power THREE?

Really, who knows what we are looking at in the next few years. For sure, the two conferences on the left are the major players. I would be very shocked if neither conference went to 18 teams by 2025. As for the other three conferences, it’s a big game of conference chicken right now. I would say the Big XII has the slight upper hand at this point but that could change in an instant. So if you love realignment, ho boy, you must have a raging hard-on right now (and will for the next few years).

OK enough of that disgusting talk. Let’s get to the meat of this post. The Power Five conference predictions. All of them. Don’t lie, you liked all the Group of Five conference (and Independent) predictions in the last post, DIDN’T YOU? So one more time, I will cram as much information down your gullet I possibly can without choking you to death with college football information. Let’s begin.

Let’s start with the….well I can’t call them the undisputed king of conferences anymore because the Big Ten is making a big charge at them. Saying that, I can still call them #1…for now. Here are the predicted SEC standings followed by some grits and chitlins and other weird Southern “delicacies.”

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Georgia 8 0 12 0
Tennessee 5 3 9 3
Florida 5 3 8 4
Kentucky 3 5 7 5
South Carolina 3 5 6 6
Missouri 1 7 4 8
Vanderbilt 0 8 2 10
  West        
Alabama 8 0 12 0
Texas A&M 7 1 11 1
Ole Miss 4 4 8 4
Arkansas 4 4 7 5
Auburn_Tigers_Logo Auburn 3 5 7 5
LSU 3 5 7 5
Mississippi State 2 6 6 6

Chitlins…GROSS!

  • Who the fuck figured out to eat the large intestine of a hog?
  • Yep, two undefeated teams coming from the SEC.  Bama and UGA don’t play each other during the regular season.  UGA has a relatively easy schedule (in an SEC sense).  Yes they have Oregon in a neutral-site game to start the season but they avoid the Tide, Aggies and Ole Miss out of the West.  Lucky Dawgs!
  • As for the Fighting Nick Sabans, damn near everyone has them running the table, at least during the regular season, and I am going right along with that prediction.  Other than their matchup against TAMU (at home) and Ole Miss in Oxford, I can’t foresee any close games all season.
  • As for the Aggies and their weird traditions (just watch a Midnight Yell practice…it’s fucking bizarre), I see them ending up one game short of getting to the SEC Championship.  Also one game short of the College Football Playoff.  Critics of Jimbo Fisher will find a way to make this sound like a failure of a season if they do comfortably make it to the New Year’s Six.
  • As per usual, the SEC West is an absolute minefield.  The worst team is Mississippi State and they wouldn’t be last in any other conference…not by a long shot.  Unfortunately, Bama’s continued dominance and TAMU and Ole Miss not falling at all will mean the rest of the teams are playing for fourth.
  • The Tennessee Volunteers are my Drinking The Kool-Aid pick of the year.  I’m buying that they will be improved enough to be on the precipice of a double-digit win season.  I can see them beating Pitt and South Carolina on the road and being perfect at home.  Now watch them go 5-7 and make me look like a dummy.
  • Conference Championship prediction: Alabama 38 Georgia 30.  Closer than last year’s win by the Tide but still not enough for UGA.

When are they going to change the name of this conference? Just call it the BIG Conference now or something like that. Big Ten. For a conference with sixteen schools. Schools. Educational institutions. And they can’t count. Glorious. Anyway, here are the predictions followed by some BTN After Dark comments:

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Ohio State 8 1 11 1
Michigan 8 1 11 1
Michigan State 6 3 9 3
Penn State 6 3 8 4
Maryland 4 5 7 5
Indiana 1 8 3 9
Rutgers 1 8 3 9
  West        
Wisconsin 6 3 9 3
Minnesota 6 3 9 3
Purdue 6 3 9 3
Nebraska 5 4 8 4
Iowa 5 4 8 4
Northwestern 1 8 4 8
Illinois 0 9 3 9

BTN After Dark Comments

  • I am so looking forward to Rutgers travelling clear across the country to face UCLA on Big Ten Network starting at 10:30 at night.
  • Can The Fighting Ann Arbor Khaki Warriors repeat as Big Ten champs?  To be honest, I don’t think they will even repeat as Big Ten East champs.  It will come down to their big matchup with tOSU two days after American Thanksgiving.  This one is in Columbus so I am giving the nod to the Buckeyes here which will be huge when it comes to what The Committee has to look at.
  • You know, considering how good the Terps’ recruiting has been lately, do you think they kind of wish, money aside, that they were back in the ACC?  Not saying they could beat Clemson but man, they would look like a really good team there.
  • The Big Ten West is going to be ridiculous.  I just have this feeling.  Five teams within one game of each other.  Yes, even Nebraska is in there.  In the end, Wisconsin will win some sort of game of Spin The Bottle, except using an ear of corn, and end up getting to the Big Ten Championship where they can scare the Buckeyes for a quarter-and-a-half.
  • Conference Championship prediction: Ohio State 32 Wisconsin 10.  As I said in the previous point, this will be close well into the second quarter and then the Buckeyes will decide enough’s enough and do away with Wisky on their way to the CFP.

I think that right there tells you all you need to know about what’s going on with the rest of the Power Five. The ACC, at this point, might as well chill since their contract with ESPN lasts for more than another decade and any change would require a hell of a lot more money to leave than what USC and UCLA will have to deal with.

Now, there are rumblings that ESPN is stepping in and trying to broker an ACC/Pac-12 merger of sorts but I can’t see that happening to be perfectly honest with you. As long as the Big Ten or SEC doesn’t decide to poach any of their members (which is still a possibility), they should be fine for the time being. Alright, let’s get to the predictions, followed by a bong hit or five:

    Conference Overall
  Atlantic W L W L
Clemson 8 0 11 1
NC State 7 1 11 1
Florida State 5 3 8 4
Louisville 5 3 7 5
Wake Forest 4 4 8 4
Boston College 3 5 6 6
Syracuse 1 7 3 9
  Coastal        
Miami 6 2 9 3
Pittsburgh 6 2 9 3
Virginia Tech 4 4 6 6
North Carolina 4 4 6 6
Virginia 2 6 5 7
Georgia Tech 1 7 2 10
Duke 0 8 2 10

Hey Dude

  • I’ve honestly thought of going to one of those cannabis shops to see what’s there.  It’s basically punishable by death here (in this condo area) to have anything weed-related so I’d have to be super sneaky about it.
  • Hey, is Clemson back on top?  Sure looks like it although NC State is going to give them a serious run for their money.  Both teams look like they are a tier above the rest (sorry Miami and Pitt) and their game on October 1st will probably be for the division title.  High stakes for sure.
  • Coastal Chaos is…not back.  Speaking of the Canes and Panthers, they are also a step above all the other teams in that division.  They will battle it out in another important ACC game on American Thanksgiving weekend which might just decide who gets their shit pushed in by the Tigers or Wolfpack.
  • I don’t consider this a Kool-Aid pick.  Florida State will be better.  No stupid upset losses to FCS schools.  Just the slow ascent back to, potentially, the top of the ACC.  Same goes for Louisville (without the FCS issue).
  • I did have Wake also in the ACC title hunt but the news that Sam Hartman will be out for at least a bit is a massive worry in Winston-Salem.  He steers the ship and without him, sorry Deacs fans, the offense just doesn’t go like it normally does.
  • Remember last year when I had North Carolina bullying their way into the College Football Playoff?  Yeah, not falling for that this time, Mack.
  • Conference Championship prediction: Clemson 47 Miami 14.  Yeah this won’t be close.

OK now we get to the first of the quasi-feuding brothers (sisters? cousins?). The Big XII is adding four teams next season and is pushing hard to get the rest of the Pac-12 teams to join them. It’s almost a certainty Oregon and Washington would rather drop football than join this conference but the rest of the schools remaining could very well be up for grabs, especially the two Arizona schools and the Mountain region schools. Until the next shoe drops, though, it’s another year of the Big XII with X schools. Here are my predictions followed by musings from a pissed off Count Von Count:

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Baylor 8 1 10 2
Oklahoma 8 1 10 2
Texas 7 2 9 3
Oklahoma State 7 2 9 3
TCU 4 5 6 6
Iowa State 4 5 6 6
Kansas State 3 6 6 6
West Virginia 2 7 4 8
Texas Tech 2 7 3 9
Kansas 0 9 2 10

ZERO!  ZERO FUCKS GIVEN!  AH AH AH!

  • Funny that if things stay as they are, the Big XII will actually get back to twelve teams so at least one conference understands preschool math.
  • The bottom of the Big XII looks to be the same.  Kansas at the bottom.  Texas Tech not far from them.  And it always feels like one of West Virginia, Kansas State or TCU ending up in eighth.  Will this change with the newcomers?  I’m gonna say no.
  • Not quite their swan song in the conference but I see the Sooners, despite all the defections, getting back to the Big XII Championship.  They are just too deep a team to not contend for, at the very least, a NY6 spot.  I expect Baylor to continue to do well under Dave Aranda and join OU at JerryWorld.
  • Conference Championship prediction: Baylor 25 Oklahoma 23.  Yeah I am predicting the Bears to finish the Big XII Championship State of Oklahoma sweep by beating the Sooners in a very close game.

I remember doing a post eight years ago on my Pac-12 predictions. Here is what I said in that post:

The Pac-12 has become the de facto second best conference in the land and it’s by a long shot as well.

Wow. I mean eight years is a long time but the fall off the cliff of the Pac-12 started not long after this post. It has been a near-disastrous eight years for the Conference of Champions in football and with USC and UCLA leaving for the Big Ten things are looking even worse for the soon-to-be Pac-10.

Look, let’s just get to the predictions before I make Bill Walton cry:

    Conference Overall
  North W L W L
Oregon 9 0 11 1
Oregon State 4 5 7 5
Washington 4 5 6 6
California 3 6 5 7
Washington State 3 6 5 7
Stanford 3 6 4 8
  South        
Utah 8 1 10 2
UCLA 7 2 10 2
USC 6 3 9 3
Arizona State 4 5 6 6
Arizona 2 7 3 9
Colorado 1 8 1 11

Bill Walton’s Tears

  • Hey remember I had U of A being terrible last year and I was right?  Well, this year I am doubling down with the Colorado Buffaloes.  I have a feeling Karl Dorrell is going to be taking a lot of ibuprofen this season.  And may start drinking if he doesn’t already do so.
  • I see a lot of experts saying USC is going to win the Pac-12 South.  They will be better, there’s no doubt about it.  But win the division after going 4-8 last year?  Let’s pump the brakes a bit.  I think Lincoln Riley is still a season away from really pushing USC to the heights they were at during the Pete Carroll era.
  • So who will win the South Division?  I think Utah repeats as South Division champions but it will be UCLA that will give them the toughest time.  The Bruins should be really good…like New Year’s Six good.  Now watch them go 4-8 and Chip Kelly get fired.
  • As for the North Division, Oregon should clinch by Thanksgiving…our Thanksgiving.  There is no one close to them.
  • Conference Championship prediction: Utah 32 Oregon 20.  Closer than last year but this time the Utes will destroy the Ducks’ dreams of the CFP.

There you go!  All conference standings predictions complete!  Next up I will put it all together and tell you who I think will win the whole thing.  Have a great week everyone!