Bowl Games? Yep. New Year’s Six? Sure. College Football Playoff? Uh-huh. Coaching Hot Seat List? Why not? My Heisman Ballot? I mean, if you have to…

Hey remember last year when I dumped all that stuff I mentioned above into one post? Guess what I’m doing again.

Look, you could say that it would take the same amount of time to put all this in separate posts. And you’d be wrong. These tags don’t just create themselves. Although if there is a way to do tags automatically I would feel like a big fucking moron. Oh well, I’m just going to keep on living thinking I have to type in all the pertinent tags to this post. Ignorance is bliss!

Let’s start with some postseason predictions. You read the two posts where I predicted the standings for all the conferences (and those four mangy Independents). At least I hope you did. If not, you might want to so it can prepare you for this because, ho boy, this could cause some people to think twice about my mental capacity. We begin with the top of the mountain, the College Football Playoff. Here is what I think the semi-finals will look like along with the rankings of the teams involved:

January 1st Sugar Bowl #1 Georgia #4 Florida State
January 1st Rose Bowl #2 Michigan #3 Alabama

Am I close to the experts’ picks? I don’t really know. I think Georgia is the easiest call here but the road to get there isn’t easy. Their regular season loss to Tennessee means they had to beat Alabama in the SEC Championship to be in the Top 4. I believe they do. I also believe Bama, being #1 going into conference championship weekend, wouldn’t fall four spots on a single loss to one of the best teams in the nation. So they stay in at #3 which I am sure will cause a ton of people to become irrational and use Twitter as a ridiculous sounding board and causing people to not want to talk about college football. Sorry…use X as a ridiculous sounding board and cause people to not want to talk about college football on social media. X. What a dumb fucking name. Anyway, Michigan should get in with a in in the Big Ten Championship, even if it is over a Minnesota team that would be near the bottom of the Top 25 going in. Finally, remember what I said about the Tide? Triple that hatred for this one. Florida State, I predict, will beat Clemson for the ACC title. The Tigers would come in to the game at #2 and FSU would be #5. I have the Noles moving up a spot and the Tigers being that one-loss team that loses out in this bunch. The amount of venom spewed by college football media and fans about this, rightly or wrongly, would be way over the top. I think it would be the first time (and would be the only time) that a team goes into conference championship weekend undefeated, loses, and tumbles out of the College Football Playoff when the smoke clears. And because of that, I hope this, or something like this happens because we need a ton of chaos for the final four-team CFP ever.

Now we go to the next tier down: the New Year’s Six. The final New Year’s Six. I would shed a tear but it feels like it’s hardly been around long enough:

January 1st Fiesta Bowl #9 USC #11 Ohio State
December 30th Orange Bowl #5 Clemson #7 Tennessee
December 30th Peach Bowl #8 Penn State #10 Notre Dame
December 29th Cotton Bowl #6 Texas #14 UTSA

Do the games look interesting? Absolutely. Could there be some debate as to who is here, who isn’t and where everyone should go (and how they get there)? Absolutely. Am I backing down from these predictions? Absolutely not. I mean if this was the 12-team playoff, I am sure people would debate that as well but you can’t tell me none of these teams would be worthy of being there. That’s crazy. “Durr, Texas doesn’t deserve to be there. They won’t even be bowl-eligible.” Yeah go fuck yourself if you think that. That’s just plain dumb.

Alright, enough anger, more analysis. Let’s start with Clemson since that’s the easiest one to explain. They were #2 and undefeated, lost to Florida State in the ACC Championship, so they get the Orange Bowl spot reserved for the top ACC team remaining. Simple. The Pac-12, in their final unglorious season, will again beat each other up making it impossible for one team to come out unscathed. So the ninth-ranked Trojans will head to the Fiesta Bowl after winning the Pac-12 title. Ohio State slots in as their opponent although it could easily be Penn State. The reasoning here is that tOSU already plays Notre Dame during the season and it makes more sense for USC to play in Phoenix than Penn State for bowl season. Those Longhorns I mentioned? They go off into the sunset, leaving the Big XII as conference champions. It puts them in the Cotton Bowl against the best Group of Five team. I think Tulane almost runs the table during the regular season and gets a pretty healthy lead in the rankings over the next best teams, UTSA and Boise State. The Roadrunners’ win in the AAC Championship would trump anything the Broncos do and, should be enough to leapfrog the Green Wave to sneak into the final NY6 spot. Let’s be honest here: Texas-UTSA at AT&T Stadium for the Cotton Bowl is an instant sellout, no doubt about it.

Now for the rest of the bowl extravaganza:

January 1st Citrus Bowl #12 LSU Minnesota
January 1st ReliaQuest Bowl #20 South Carolina Michigan State
December 30th Arizona Bowl San Diego State Toledo
December 30th Music City Bowl Ole Miss #17 Iowa
December 29th Liberty Bowl Texas A&M #16 TCU
December 29th Sun Bowl Duke #24 Utah
December 29th Gator Bowl Kentucky #21 North Carolina
December 28th Alamo Bowl #19 Kansas State #18 Oregon
December 28th Pop Tarts Bowl Pittsburgh Oklahoma
December 28th Pinstripe Bowl Maryland Louisville
December 28th Fenway Bowl Syracuse FAU
December 27th Texas Bowl Arkansas Baylor
December 27th Holiday Bowl Miami #13 Oregon State
December 27th Duke’s Mayo Bowl Wake Forest Auburn
December 27th Military Bowl NC State #15 Tulane
December 26th Guaranteed Rate Bowl San Jose State Oklahoma State
December 26th First Responder Bowl UCF East Carolina
December 26th Quick Lane Bowl Illinois Ohio
December 23rd Hawaii Bowl SMU Fresno State
December 23rd Las Vegas Bowl #23 Wisconsin Washington State
December 23rd 68 Ventures Bowl South Alabama Middle Tennessee
December 23rd Idaho Potato Bowl Air Force Miami-OH
December 23rd Armed Forces Bowl Kansas UTEP
December 23rd Birmingham Bowl Mississippi State North Texas
December 23rd Camellia Bowl Appalachian State New Mexico State
December 22nd Gasparilla Bowl UCLA James Madison
December 21st Boca Raton Bowl Coastal Carolina UConn
December 19th Frisco Bowl Marshall Navy
December 18th Myrtle Beach Bowl Southern Miss Buffalo
December 16th Independence Bowl Texas Tech Memphis
December 16th LA Bowl #22 Washington #25 Boise State
December 16th New Mexico Bowl Wyoming Louisiana
December 16th Cure Bowl Army Georgia Southern
December 16th New Orleans Bowl Troy WKU
December 16th Bahamas Bowl Eastern Michigan Liberty

That is a lot of bowl games. I am not complaining. I am fully embracing the Sickos mentality of all football is good football. Even arena football if you can believe it! And why am I not complaining? Because I am desperate for the season to start. Talk to me in mid-December and I may have a slightly different answer. Some notes on these bowl games:

  • The teams that juuuuuuust missed out on the New Year’s Six train to nowhere include LSU, Oregon State, Tulane and TCU.
  • Quite a few teams would be playing close to home, including Mississippi State travelling to relatively close by Birmingham, Air Force with a not-so-long drive north into Idaho, South Alabama playing exactly 0 kilometres from their home stadium in the renamed 68 Ventures Bowl, Ohio venturing into hostile territory to play in the Quick Lane Bowl and Wake Forest making their way to hopefully get their coach dumped with mayo in the Duke’s Mayo Bowl.
  • Hey remember what I said two posts ago about James Madison and a surprise for their fans? I know that was a lot of reading ago. Look, there won’t be enough teams to satisfy all the bowl slots. I have a feeling that will be a trend going forward. And because of that, the Dukes will have the opportunity to go to a bowl if they are invited before the team with the best APR score. And I’m sure at least one bowl would do that since JMU should be good once again this season. Man, do I ever hate the transition rule. I get the first year coming up that you shouldn’t qualify for anything. Get your feet wet. Sure. Longer than that is just the NCAA being insufferable dicks and not updating policies that are over 50 years old.
  • As for those 5-7 teams making bowls they would be Georgia Southern, Buffalo, and Navy (which would kill my scenario for the Army-Navy Game).

I guess I should mention who I think will win the whole thing. Well, I’ve got Georgia beating Florida State and Michigan beating Bama in the semis and then the Wolverines ending the three-peat talk by beating the Dawgs in Houston for the title. Then Khaki Jim can ride off into the sunset…that sunset being back to the NFL.

Well look who is back in the FBS. Rich God Damn Rodriguez! He is at the helm of one of FBS’s newest teams, the Jacksonville State Gamecocks. I’m sure it won’t be an amazing season for the team but man, who thought he would be back at the top level of college football? Probably a few although I wondered if he was basically done being a head coach at this level. Shows what I know.

Hey, hey it’s HOT SEAT TIME! Last year my top two were jettisoned and Herm got an all-timer of an on-field shitcanning. I am still surprised some made it to this season (I am looking at you Mike Bloomgren) but all in all this list is a list I am actually proud of since I actually do well at it, as morbid as that sounds.

Alright let’s get to the list. Going with the new categorizations as well this time around. Let’s go!

Almost Guaranteed Shitcanning

  1. Neal Brown (West Virginia) – He was #3 on my list last season and I honestly don’t know how he is still employed in Morgantown. And it’s not like things are looking super rosy there. Needed to keep his job – Honestly? A fucking miracle. Prediction – A mid-to-late-season shitcanning and no job next year as he starts quite a few rungs down the ladder in 2025.
  2. Danny Gonzales (New Mexico) – Now let’s head to the southwest and a place that is very difficult to win at. Other than Rocky Long I don’t think anyone has really done anything of note in Albuquerque. The problem becomes how long do you give a coach a chance to win at a place where victories are at a premium? Honestly, Gonzales would be lower down the list if it wasn’t for what Jerry Kill did down the road in Las Cruces last year. Needed to keep his job – Vying for a bowl spot in the final two weeks of the regular season. Prediction – Near the bottom of the Mountain West pecking order yet again and maybe even a late-season firing.
  3. Dana Holgorsen (Houston) – Look, Drunk Uncle Dana is entertaining. But the shtick gets old. And if they are as mediocre as I believe they will be in their first year in the Big XII, it’ll be lights out for Holgorsen. Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility, period. Prediction – I don’t think they will even have a shot at a bowl game in the final week of the season meaning Dana’s fate will be pretty much sealed by that point.
  4. Eliah Drinkwitz (Missouri) – I don’t like harping on a guy’s looks but this guy looks more like Milton from Office Space than a college football head coach. Which is perfectly fine…if you win. This guy has hovered around .500 since coming to CoMo and I think a year under .500 would be the final straw. Needed to keep his job – At least a .500 record if not an upset or two inside the SEC. Prediction – I see him falling one game short of his goal and the athletic department feeling like they have to make a move now rather than wait.
  5. Mike Neu (Ball State) – Neu has had his moments at Ball State but really hasn’t rose above an also-ran in the MAC. The Cardinals seem to consistently sit near the bottom of the MAC West which gives plenty of reason for a coach to get jettisoned. Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility. That’s it, that’s all. Prediction – I can’t see them winning more than four games this season so expect him to be the most likely MAC head coach to be fired first.

Probable Shitcanning

  1. Ricky Rahne (Old Dominion) – Rahne really has not been able to recreate some of the magic that his predecessor, Bobby Wilder, had.  I’m not saying the Monarchs were great under Wilder: but they were fun to watch and competed hard. Haven’t seen as much of that under Double R.  Needed to keep his job – Be competitive and play some meaningful November football.  Prediction – Quite possibly the worst Group of Five team and a tough decision to be made by the athletic director.
  2. Tom Allen (Indiana) – Where are the 2020 Indiana Hoosiers?  We can finally say that that version of the team was a complete aberration which sucks for their fans.  Allen really is on borrowed time but there is the slight possibility he is kept on when the brand-new Big Ten starts next season without divisions.  A SLIGHT possibility.  Needed to keep his job – 4 or even 5 wins and looking more competitive against some better Big Ten teams.  Prediction – 3 wins and a quiet exit (for Tom).
  3. Mike Bloomgren (Rice) – The bloom comes off the rose yadda, yadda, yadda.  One of these years I am going to be right about this guy.  Not that I want to be: I am just genuinely befuddled as to why this guy is still the head coach at Rice.  Needed to keep his job – Not looking like a punching bag moving up to the American Conference.  Prediction – Four wins which isn’t bad but some bad losses inside the conference and finally his removal from the sidelines.

Possible Shitcanning

  1. Billy Napier (Florida) – Napier suffers from the fact that even if the previous few coaches have ended up as disasters they had their successes as well.  He hasn’t done anything and the Gators were barely bowl-eligible with a supposed franchise quarterback under centre.  Now it’s a step back.  It comes down to how far of a step back he will be allowed.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility should do the trick.  Prediction – I have them missing out on the postseason so there should be plenty of angry fans in Gainesville.
  2. Brent Pry (Virginia Tech) – Poor Brent.  Last season wasn’t too bad when he took over the Hokies.  This season on the other hand…I don’t see good things in Blacksburg.  Maybe I’ll be wrong (and lord knows I have been wrong in the past) but if it’s as tough a season as I think it will be for VaTech, Pry might be fine with being done as head coach.  Needed to keep his job – Some improvement over last year.  Prediction – I have the Hokies winning only one game this season. One. That is not improvement. At all.
  3. Greg Schiano (Rutgers) – I don’t know where Rutgers goes from here.  They’ve had a tough slog since joining the Big Ten.  They are the butt of pretty much every realignment joke and meme.  And I’m not sure firing Schiano, their best coach ever, will fix anything. But at some point, changes have to be made to at least try and improve.  Needed to keep his job – At least 4 wins but more to be competitive inside the Big Ten.  Prediction – 4 wins but the competitiveness part…yeah I don’t know about that.
  4. Terry Bowden (ULM) – Same spot for Terry as last year.  I honestly don’t know the end game for all of this.  I can’t see him coaching the Warhawks into being a top notch Sun Belt team. Is he grooming the next head coach? It’s very confusing. That’s why I put him here and not higher up the list.  Needed to keep his job – Have a better record than last year and put a scare into a few of the better Sun Belt teams.  Prediction – Last year I predicted one win for them. This year it’s two. Something has to give at some point.
  5. Shawn Elliott (Georgia State) – Look, it’s not like Georgia State is a destination coaching spot.  Saying that, the Sun Belt has become a lot tougher over the past half-a-decade.  So if you’re not moving forward, you’re falling further behind. And this is what it feels like with Georgia State. They aren’t getting worst but they aren’t improving and quite a few teams are leaving them in their dust.  Needed to keep his job – Competitive football in November and possibility for bowl eligibility during the final week.  Prediction – I have them at 4 wins this season so this could be an interesting off-season decision in Atlanta.
  6. Scot Loeffler (Bowling Green) – This is Scott (with one T)’s fifth season at Bowling Green.  I don’t know why that surprises me but it does.  The Falcons really haven’t done anything other than sneak into one bowl game in his tenure.  It is, however, Bowling Green so the expeectations are a lot lower here. At some point, though, thre has to be some semblance of results and this guy just isn’t delivering.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility and looking like a contender in the MAC East.  Prediction – No bowl game and they won’t look like a contender. Saying that, he may still be around for 2024 but on a very short leash.
  7. Jeff Hafley (Boston College) – It has been a struggle on the Hill for Hafley and with no divisions there’s nowhere really to hide now in the ACC. The lack of success over the past decade-plus could be what keeps Hafley on for 2024. Needed to keep his job – 5 wins and having a shot at a bowl on the final weekend. Prediction – 5 wins and they will have two shots to claim bowl eligibilty and will fail at both but it will be enough for another year with Hafley.

Doubtful Shitcanning (although it still could happen)

  1. Justin Wilcox (California) – Wilcox might not have to worry if Cal just shuts down the entire program.  I’m only half-joking with that sentence.  I think the athletic department has much bigger things to worry about right now.  Meaning if Wilcox is fired it might be done by text.  Needed to keep his job – Possible bowl contention.  Prediction – They aren’t going to a bowl game and it looks like, for now, they have to be thinking about filling a schedule for 2024 more than dealing with their below-average head coach.
  2. Mel Tucker (Michigan State) – Tucks signed for a lot of money to coach in East Lansing so last year better be an aberration.  Let’s be honest: even with being in arguably the toughest division in college football, the Spartans will be much improved this season. Shouldn’t be much of a worry here unless they come out of the gate VERY slowly.  Needed to keep his job – Probably 7 wins.  Prediction – He will get them to 7 and maybe, just maybe, they will put a scare into one of the top three teams in the division.
  3. Dana Dimel (UTEP) – Dimel must have been thanking his lucky stars once he saw the exodus from Conference USA.  Having a few newcomers join makes things a bit easier for the Miners this year and gives Dimel one more year, almost certainly, on the job.  Next season? Who knows.  Needed to keep his job –  Fighting for bowl eligibility during the final weekend.  Prediction – They should be bowl eligible in early November so the pressure will be off…for now.
  4. Thomas Hammock (Northern Illinois) – It feels like every other year at NIU things look good.  And then every other year things look bad. And so forth. So it should be good this year in Dekalb, no?.  Needed to keep his job – Look like a contender in the MAC West.  Prediction – I have them at five wins so maybe they will shock me?
  5. Don Brown (UMass) – Probably the toughest job for a head coach in FBS is being the head man at UMass.  I have said for years now that the Minutemen should just drop to the FCS. I still think they should but I do understand the financial ramifications. Still, at some point don’t you think the fans yearn for something more than a couple of wins a season at most?  Needed to keep his job – Win a game. Any game.  Prediction – I think they win one game and I’m not guaranteeing it will be against their one FCS opponent. Brown should be fine going into 2024.

I think I say this ever year but I have to go back one day and really determine how good I am at this coaching hot seat list. I feel I do well and I hope the numbers would back me up. But I am used to disappointment so I am not holding my breath.

There’s a reason I don’t get a Heisman ballot. I am sure if even if I was the most prominent college football journalist in the land they would say “Sorry, Bossman, no can do.” Probably because my ballots have been mostly garbage in the past. Let’s see if I can somehow do better this year. Let’s just get to my ballot before I regret even posting this.

Bossman’s Heisman Ballot of Mediocrity

  1. Jordan Travis, Florida State – I know everyone and their mother is picking Caleb Williams to win the Heisman. I can’t see that happening because voters almost seem to want to avoid giving any player not named Archie Griffin back-to-back Heismans and most of the time it goes to a player on a team that’s in the Top 4 (or close to it). Travis is predicted to at least go to New York for the ceremony so it’s not like I am way off here. Plus, I think his passing stats will explode as FSU hits the CFP for the first time in what feels like forever.
  2. Caleb Williams, USC – Because I don’t have the Trojans winning the title this season or getting to the College Football Playoff is one of the main reasons I think Williams doesn’t win his second Heisman. He should be close to his passing stats from last season and at least he will make the voters think twice all year as he will never be far from the top of the Heisman hopefuls list.
  3. Drake Maye, North Carolina – Maye is only a sophomore this season so he may be prepping for his true Heisman run in 2024. He will turn a lot of heads this season, though, with UNC battling FSU and Clemson at the top of the ACC.
  4. Bo Nix, Oregon – Bo’s move from the SEC to the Pac-12 was huge and reinvigorated his fledgling career. Much of the Ducks’ hopes this year to win the Pac-12 in their swan song season rests on his shoulders and it is going to be a dogfight at the top. One huge game from Bo in a big conference game could put Oregon in the national title picture.
  5. Marvin Harrison Jr., Ohio State – As long as the Buckeyes can figure out who is going to be flinging the ball over the field at quarterback, Harrison should have a monster season. There is an outside chance that he will be the #1 pick in the NFL Draft so I am sure he will be going all-out all season. As long as Ryan Day doesn’t decide to run the ball a lot more this season, Harrison is tOSU’s ticket to New York.
  6. Michael Penix Jr., Washington – I believe that, as is the case lately, that the Pac-12 teams will beat each other up and no one will be high enough in the rankings to be in the CFP. For some players it’s not a huge issue (see: Williams, Caleb last year). For some, it’s the main reason they either don’t win the Heisman or don’t get invited to New York at all. I see Penix being one of those guys. Washington will be very good but not quite good enough and stuck in a group of six teams that are all pretty damn good this year. Playing out west doesn’t help either, despite what some may say.
  7. J.J. McCarthy, Michigan – Here is the guy under center (centre?) who will finally push Michigan over the top this year. He won’t throw for a shit-ton of yards but it will be enough (along with this ground game) to put him in the Heisman conversation for a bit at least. A win over tOSU alone may give him the New York invite (if it was up to Michigan fans).
  8. Quinn Ewers, Texas – Texas is probably a huge dark horse pick to win it all this year and Ewers has to be considered a bit of a dark horse Heisman cadidate. The only thing that could make this not the case is if he has a bad quarter or two and Sark gets an itchy trigger finger and puts Arch Manning in for longer than a few series.
  9. Cade Klubnik, Clemson – The Fighting Dabos are going to be back on top…at least through the regular season. I don’t think many will be surprised with this. I’m not fully sold on Klubnik but he is an improvement on D.J. Uiagalelei and the Tigers defense will be able to pick up the slack when he struggles a bit. But those struggles will cost him a seat at the Heisman table I’m sure.
  10. Jayden Daniels, LSU – Hey, have you ever remembred a time where the quality of the quarterbacks in the SEC has been this low? Not saying Daniels isn’t good because he is. But there are a few teams, Alabama and Georgia most notably, that have potential QB issues this season in the SEC and a few other teams that have returning quarterbacks that are honestly just above-average at best. Daniels may get some Heisman talk just because he may end up being that much better than any other QB in the conference.

Honourable Mention

  • Blake Corum, Michigan
  • Sam Hartman, Notre Dame
  • Joe Milton III, Tennessee
  • Braelon Allen, Wisconsin
  • Kyle McCord, Ohio State
  • Drew Allar, Penn State
  • Harold Perkins, LSU
  • Brock Bowers, Georgia
  • J.T. Tuimoloau, Ohio State

There you go. If one of those nineteen aforementioned players wins the Heisman, I will feel…well, good is not quite correct. Satisfied? Sure, let’s go with that.

The college football predictions…..they are complete! In a little less than half a year from now, I will find out how poorly I did. Gee, I can’t wait.

At some point soon I will do my lovely NFL predictions which are sure to also be not fully correct. Then…….Week…..Fucking…….ZERO!!!!!! I will have the schedule up at least a few days before the games commence. And yes, if you are looking for games on the specialty pack, don’t. Week Zero has almost never shown Week Zero games. Almost. Kind of a crapshoot with these idiotic Canadian cable companies. Enjoy your week everyone!

Oh man, here we go again

It felt like things were calm. We were all lulled into this. It was just the eye of the storm. Sure the wind wasn’t moving but about 200 metres away, a cow just went flying headlong into a barn.

What am I talking about? Realignment, of course! Another shoe has dropped…OK let me use a different analogy. Sorry Deion. We have another big move as Colorado will be going back to the Big XII starting next season. And that probably won’t be all. The rumours have at least one of Arizona, Arizona State, Utah, Oregon or Washington following the Buffaloes. Or, if no other schools leave the Pac-12, the Big XII is more than willing to dip into the American Conference (hello SMU, Memphis, Tulane) or even way out east…yes, UConn! And maybe once the Pac-12 (or more like Pac-9) gets their act together, they can start bringing in teams from the Group of Five. The same teams from the American would be in play, especially SMU. Also, the Mountain West would be watching closely as San Diego State, Boise State and perhaps Colorado State and UNLV could be looked at. There will be a lot of meetings in the next month or so to determine where this all leads.

For now let’s focus on what this post was supposed to be (and still will be). It’s time for the Power Five conference predictions. This will give a better indication on how I think things will go during this season. So let’s dive right in!

Changes are coming soon for the Ess Ee Cee. Texas and Oklahoma join the conference next season. Also, no more SEC on CBS after this year. Everything moves to ABC and ESPN. And finally, no divisions. Halle-fucking-lujah.

As for this year, all the talk is about Georgia and doing something no team has done (fully) in the AP Poll era: win three national championships in a row. It’s not like they will fall apart, despite the fact they lost their starting quarterback and a bunch of other players in the NFL Draft. Then again, I’m sure Kirby Smart has looked them all dead in the eye and told them “Everyone thinks you are going to go 5-7 and lose to Vanderbilt. Prove them wrong!” And they will believe it because college football head coaches are just a notch-and-a-half below cult leaders in the pecking order of how much they can make their “followers” drink their Kool-Aid.

Remember, though, there are other teams in the conference as well. Like those lovable underdogs from Tuscaloosa, Alabama, and the team that just reeks of success (in the classroom and on the baseball diamond), Vanderbilt. And eleven other teams. Want to find out how I think they will do? OK. I will do that. Just for you.

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Georgia 7 1 11 1
Tennessee 6 2 10 2
South Carolina 5 3 8 4
Kentucky 3 5 6 6
Missouri 2 6 5 7
Florida 2 6 5 7
Vanderbilt 1 7 4 8
  West        
Alabama 8 0 12 0
LSU 6 2 9 3
Ole Miss 4 4 8 4
Texas A&M 4 4 8 4
Arkansas 3 5 7 5
Auburn_Tigers_Logo Auburn 3 5 7 5
Mississippi State 2 6 6 6

Just For You

  • You might think I am crazy for having UGA not run the table. I do think they will lose a regular season game and it will be to those upstart Tennessee Volunteers. It won’t keep them from winning the division though as you can see I have those same Vols losing two conference games during the regular season.
  • As for the SEC West, though, Bama will once again rule the roost….as long as they figure out their quarterback situation. I am thinking they will and will go undefeated and be #1 in the nation going into conference championship weekend. If they don’t get their QB situation settled…well, maybe they lose two games? Three? It’s not like they will fall to 6-6.
  • I could see South Carolina or last year’s SEC West champs, LSU, making a bit of a run this time around. They have the top two quarterbacks in the SEC and could each put up piles of points. Watch for the Cocks’ game against Georgia early on in the season and LSU’s post-Halloween trip to Bryant-Denny to face the Tide. Upsets in either of those games will seriously upset the apple cart.
  • Look, the Gators were barely .500 with who I think may be one of the most overhyped quarterbacks in recent memory. I don’t think Anthony Richardson was that great. And now they don’t even have him. Unless every other part of the roster improved (it didn’t), how do people expect this team to bounce back and all of a sudden become an eight or nine win team? Spoiler alert: they won’t.
  • I have Mississippi State at 6-6. They will do just enough to get a bowl game. I wonder how tough it will be after the loss of Mike Leach but I can see them straightening things out just in time late in the season.
  • As for the SEC Championship, SURPRISE! I have the Dawgs beating the Tide and creating a massive clusterfuck in the final College Football Playoff rankings. Fun times!
  • Eleven bowl teams from the SEC with two juuuuuust on the outside. That’s insane and I don’t think I will be that far off with this prediction. Next year could be even crazier with Texas and Oklahoma joining the conference that just means more.

Man have things really changed in terms of where you will see Big Ten games this season. Gone are ABC and ESPN. In is NBC and CBS. This is gonna feel weird the first time I see it. And maybe the next few times as well. I will get used to it at some point. Now if you want the opportunity to watch every Big Ten game, better find a way to get FOX Sports One and Peacock otherwise you will be shit out of luck to watch potential bangers like Northwestern-Purdue and Indiana-Rutgers (if they end up there and not the Big Ten Network).

Alright, let’s get into the final conference predictions before the B1G gives a big Fuck You to geography and brings in USC and UCLA.

    Conference Overall
  East W L W L
Michigan 8 1 11 1
Penn State 8 1 11 1
Ohio State 8 1 10 2
Michigan State 5 4 7 5
Maryland 5 4 8 4
Indiana 1 8 3 9
Rutgers 1 8 4 8
  West        
Minnesota 6 3 8 4
Wisconsin 6 3 9 3
Iowa 6 3 9 3
Illinois 5 4 7 5
Nebraska 2 7 5 7
Purdue 2 7 5 7
Northwestern 0 9 2 10

Geogpraphy, Go Eat a Dick

  • Look, I know some might look at the Big Ten East standings and think I am a bit crazy. I am not. Although that is what a crazy person would tell you. Yep, a three-way tie at the top at 8-1 between Big Blue, tOSU and PSU. Because each team will be 1-1 against the other two, the CFP Rankings will decide the winner. I believe the Wolverines will somehow win that. And yes, I think Ohio State also loses to Notre Dame. O-H! I-No.
  • If Sparty doesn’t make it to a bowl game, they may end up giving Mel Tucker the Herm Edwards treatment and fire him before he can leave the playing surface one game. I get they have a tough division but they should be able to do well enough against the rest of their schedule to get back in the postseason after last year’s debacle.
  • No, I don’t have Wisconsin winning the West division. Meaning I am different than almost every expert out there. Also, there’s the fact I’m not an expert but I digress. Again I have a damn three-way tie but no need to look at the rankings for this one as I believe the Gophers will Row the Fucking Boat all the way to Indianapolis after beating both Wisky and the high-octane Iowa Hawkeyes. See what I did there? Yeah, I don’t care that the Hawkeyes have a new quarterback in town. Until Kirk tells his son to do better, Iowa will be pushing for some 7-6 victories. Sorry. 8-6. Two field goals and a late safety to win.
  • Nebraska will be better but I think the Huskers are a season away from getting back to the top of the West…just in time for the West to just not exist anymore.
  • As for Northwestern…man. What a shitshow. Look, I played a lot of sports earlier in my life and did so at the university level. Are there fun little pranks and stupid things the rookies have to do? Sometimes. But it’s usually harmless. Carrying bags, standing up during a team dinner to get embarrassed by singing some Mariah Carey song, dumb things like that. Not getting fucking dry humped in some cultish fashion by weirdos in robes. What the fuck is wrong with that school? And yes, it’s not just the football program. Sounds like at least half the teams there have serious issues. Ugh.
  • Now let’s get crazy. Yeah! The Big Ten Championship will…OK who am I kidding. It won’t be close. I have Michigan plowing through Minny to clinch their spot, yet again, in the College Football Playoff.

Might as well call this the Stable Conference…for now. Just nothing happening here which is just fine for most of the teams in the ACC. Status quo isn’t a bad thing. There are some changes with where you will see games. The CW…yes, the C-Fucking-W, will have an ACC game during most of the weeks of the season. You can take the ACC out of Jefferson-Pilot (or Raycom) but you can’t take the Jefferson-Pilot (or Raycom) out of the ACC. Or something like that.

So before this conference possibly gets pillaged by the Big Ten and SEC, let’s get to the predictions followed by some deep tissue massage and/or analysis.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Clemson 8 0 12 10
Florida State 7 1 11 1
North Carolina 6 2 9 3
Pittsburgh 5 3 8 4
Louisville 5 3 8 4
Duke 4 4 8 4
Wake Forest 4 4 7 5
NC State 4 4 7 5
Miami 4 4 7 5
Syracuse 3 5 6 6
Boston College 2 6 5 7
Virginia 2 6 4 8
Georgia Tech 2 6 4 8
Virginia Tech 0 8 1 11

Deep Tissue Massage and/or Analysis

  • I should book a massage. My back is in horrible shape.
  • Some may scoff at me having Clemson going undefeated this season. They have the schedule to do it and if Cade Klubnik is as good as he can be this could relatively easily happen. If Klubnik struggles…well then this entire set of standings might need to be scrubbed from existence.
  • Reader Gord will like where I have Florida State. This team could be scary good. And at the very least, they will be near the top of the ACC standings this season. Mike Norvell has done a great job getting this team back to what it was like during the Jimbo Fisher days. I had my doubts about him but I have to admit he has been the right guy to right the ship in Tallahassee.
  • Hey did you notice? NO DIVISIONS! I love it.
  • Don’t be surprised that if Clemson or FSU stumbles that there are no shortage of teams that could get one of the two ACC title game slots. A list of seven teams could pull off a couple of upsets and be at the top and it wouldn’t be a huge surprise. A slight surprise sure. Maybe a slightly bigger surprise if it was Miami or NC State. But not a massive surprise.
  • Poor Virginia Tech. I think this will be their worst team since before Frank Beamer graced Blacksburg. It feels like it has been forever since the Hokies were contenders. It was only seven years ago when they were in the ACC Championship and almost upset the eventual national champions, Clemson. This team is pretty bad in almost every aspect of the game and the schedule will not be helpful to them. Other than Old Dominion I don’t see them winning any other game and the Monarchs have given VT all sorts of fits the past few years.
  • Look for a tiny bit of a bounce back from Virginia. Just them taking the field after what happened last year is a win in my books.
  • For that ACC title game, how about another game that will turn everything on its head. Yep, I think the Noles will get revenge for a regular season loss by inching out the Tigers. Chaos!

OK it’s about time the Big XII rebrands. They will have at least thirteen teams by the time the 2024 season starts and it may be as high as sixteen. So change the fucking name. They have the rights to the Big Fourteen and Big Sixteen so use one of those. It would be easy. Find a graphic design student at Kansas and have them do a new logo. Easy peasy. Why do I have to come up with everything?

Where was I? Oh that’s right, predictions. Let’s see if this conference will go all Pac-12 and cannibalize itself or if they can see a team get to the CFP once again. Also, Texas and Oklahoma will be trying their best to leave the conference on a high note much to the chagrin of the rest of the schools in the conference. So here are the Big XII standings predictions, followed by Belly Expansions.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
Texas 8 1 10 2
Kansas State 7 2 10 2
Baylor 6 3 8 4
TCU 6 3 9 3
Oklahoma 6 3 9 3
Texas Tech 5 4 8 4
Oklahoma State 5 4 8 4
Kansas 4 5 7 5
UCF_Knights_logo UCF 4 5 7 5
BYU_Athletic_Logo.svg_ BYU 3 6 5 7
cincinnati bearcats Cincinnati 3 6 5 7
Houston_Cougars_Logo_(1999-2012) Houston 2 7 4 8
Iowa_State_Cyclones_logo Iowa State 2 7 4 8
west virginia West Virginia 2 7 3 9

Belly Expansions

  • No I don’t mean pregnancy. I mean eating a big meal and having to loosen the ol’ belt or just unbuckle the pants altogether. Funny enough, people in the restaurant don’t appreciate that.
  • Let’s start at the bottom. There won’t be one truly bad team. There will be a bunch of below-average ones. West Virginia, Iowa State, Houston, Cincinnati and BYU could all finish last and I am sure no one would bat an eye.
  • I see the Longhorns making their final Big XII season a special one. They have the team, the schedule and the head coach (I think) to be the top team in this conference this season. The only question will be can Quinn Ewers hold off Arch Manning. Will one of them transfer in the offseason? Remember, when you have two starting quarterbacks, you have none. I think.
  • How about this lukewarm take: Kansas State will be good again. Yeah really going out on a limb there Bossman. This team has become so steady-as-she-goes it’s almost boring. The people in the Little Apple are fine with this.
  • I do think one of the newcomers will make a bowl game and that team will be UCF. I think they are the most prepared of the newbies coming into this conference. But make no mistake about it: all four teams will be good at various points over the next few years.
  • I can’t see Oklahoma taking enough of a leap to get to the Big XII Championship. Nor do I think the Horned Frogs of TCU have the, uh, toads? to make it back to the conference title game. Good seasons for both, yes, but not great.
  • The Longhorns should win the conference title game in their final season in the Big XII. Will this get them into the CFP or will it “relegate” them to the New Year’s Six? I think you can tell from my predictions so far but you will know for sure in a different post.

So where are we going to be able to watch Pac-12 games in the future? Who the hell knows. My money is on PBS.

But seriously, the Pac-12 is quickly dropping from the Conference of Champions to almost a Group of Five conference. They are losing USC and UCLA next year to the Big Ten. They knew that already. The bombshell of Colorado leaving now has them at nine teams starting the 2024 season. And it may not end there. The only schools I haven’t heard potentially leaving are Oregon State and Washington State. That’s not to say all these rumours will be correct but I will be pretty surprised if no more teams leave for the Big XII before next season. It’s sad for a conference that really started their slide once Pete Carroll left USC for the NFL. Thanks a bunch, Peter.

Prediction time! No divisions which is one thing they are ahead of the game with, starting that last year. Let’s get to those divisionless predictions followed by some California Nightmarin’.

    Conference Overall
    W L W L
USC 8 1 10 2
Utah 7 2 9 3
Oregon 7 2 9 3
Oregon State 7 2 10 2
Washington State 6 3 8 4
Washington 6 3 9 3
UCLA 5 4 8 4
Colorado 3 6 4 8
California 2 7 4 8
Arizona 2 7 4 8
Arizona State 1 8 3 9
Stanford 0 9 2 10

California Nightmarin’

  • No state will have it better this year in the Pac-12 than the state of Oregon. Both the Ducks and the Beavers look to be serious contenders and only need the ball to bounce their way one extra time to maybe get to the Pac-12 Championship. And considering the way that title game has gone, who knows what may happen after that.
  • The strongest team, though, should be USC. They have Caleb Williams coming back to try and do what no one other than some guy named Archie has ever done, and that’s win two Heisman Trophies. The hope there is that the sting of the two season-ending losses will motivate them to push themselves that final step into the CFP.
  • OK look, I know you see Washington in sixth place and you are wondering what the fuck is wrong with me. This is another case where the schedule is just flat-out against them. A slightly easier schedule and I might put this team at eleven or even, dare I say it, twelve wins. It will be that close at the top of the conference.
  • On the other hand, I am sure no will think I’m crazy for putting Stanford in last place. It’s been a long time since the Cardinal have been this bad and it doesn’t look like they will be ready for bowl action for another year at least.
  • I think I was fair putting Colorado at 4-8 for this season and playing fairly meaningful football going into November. There seems to be two schools of thought with this team. One section thinks Coach Prime has done wonders and with all the fresh faces in the lineup it will push the team over the line and into bowl-eligibility territory. The other section thinks the entire program is overhyped and they will win maybe two games. I am in the middle on this. This team won’t go bowling this year. That would be too much of a leap. But they should win more games than they did last year. If not, what the hell was all this hoopla for?
  • As for the Pac-12 title game, USC gets the Pac-12 Championship they probably should have won last year. Problem is that by this point there will be a lot of teams in the mix for those four College Football Playoff spots and in typical Pac-12 fashion, the league will have cannabilized itself again and missed out on the CFP again.

There you go! You now have a complete set of Bossman conference predictions. Next up, is kind of the wrap-up post where I put everything in a nice, neat little ball and let you know who I believe will win the whole damn deal. Have a great week everyone!

Alright let’s wrap this up in a nice, neat little package

Oh man did you actually believe that?  LITTLE?  Have you not noticed what I’ve been doing the last little while?  Oh this will not be a little package I assure you; but it will be an important package of information that you, the college football fan, would like to see (I hope).

So yes, you will see what I believe the College Football Playoff and the New Year’s Six will look like.  You will get bowl projections from yours truly.  You will also get my Heisman ballot which is usually a big steaming pile of horseshit.  And you will get my coaching hot seat list which, honestly, is usually pretty good if I say so myself.

Let’s get right to it with the top of the pyramid (scheme)…the College Football Playoff predictions.  You probably have a good idea from the conference predictions as to who will end up here and you also know that there is a good chance I will fail miserably with one of these picks:

December 31st Fiesta Bowl #2 Ohio State #3 Georgia
December 31st Peach Bowl #1 Alabama #4 Clemson

New Year’s Eve semi-finals.  Will they never learn?  Anyway, Bama is the easy call here as I see them running the table and then beating UGA in what may be the biggest SEC Championship ever (and that’s saying a lot).  This also means that Georgia is probably a fairly easy call as well.  Sure, they will lose to the Tide but if they go in at #2 (which I expect them to) and lose to #1 (which I assume Bama would be) then a drop to #3 is as far as they will go.  No way they are leaving out a one-loss Big Ten champ so tOSU gets in and takes advantage of one of Alabama or Georgia having to lose to get to the #2 spot.  OK take advantage is a strong phrase since being #2 means very little other than avoiding #1 until, potentially, the title game.  Clemson ends up beating out Texas A&M, Michigan and NC State, all one-loss teams who didn’t win their division, rather easily to grab the final semi-final spot.  Oregon would have their shot at the Pac-12 Championship but lose to Utah making The Committee’s job (at least for these two games) rather straightforward.

Now we will go to the New Year’s Six bowl games where, thanks to the NFL, none of them are on New Year’s Day.  Eat shit, Rose Bowl.

January 2nd Rose Bowl #6 Michigan #10 Utah
January 2nd Cotton Bowl #11 Oregon #8 Houston
December 31st Sugar Bowl #5 Texas A&M #9 Baylor
December 30th Orange Bowl #7 NC State #12 Notre Dame

As always, it’s debate time.  Every year which is fine as long as the debates devolve into some stupid Twitter spat.  Only one conference championship loser is getting in here and that’s Oregon.  They’ll be high enough in the rankings (potentially in the Top 4) going into Conference Championship weekend that there is no way they drop out of a NY6 bowl.  Houston won’t be this year’s Cincinnati but they will be this year’s Group of Five representative in the New Year’s Six and they will coast to get here.  Michigan is going to have another good year but they have the audacity to be in the same division as Ohio State.  Assholes.  This will be enough to keep them out of the CFP.  Same goes for TAMU and NC State.  What were they thinking being in a division with other good schools.  And you wonder why I hate divisions.  We could have a tOSU-UM rematch and a Clemson-NCST rematch for conference championships.  Talk about a lot more being on the line and a hell of a lot more intrigue.

Utah, with their win over Oregon in the Pac-12 Championship, gets the other Rose Bowl spot opposite Michigan.  Luckily, they should ascend to somewhere around the #10 ranking that I have them in so they will look like they belong.  Baylor also gets the benefit of a good bowl tie-in and I have them facing their old Southwest Conference foe, the Aggies of Texas A&M.  Just like Utah, the Bears will be good enough to belong here and not spark any crazy debate about bowl tie-ins.  The only debate will be for the final spot.  Look, it’s Notre Dame.  If the Irish go 10-2, they are not being left out of this group of bowl games.  As much as some of you want that to be the case, it never will be (until the CFP structure changes).  They beat out UCLA, Oklahoma and Marshall.  Very few, other than those schools’ fans, will be super upset they were left out.

Now it’s time for the rest of BOWL SZN.  At least I know these bowls won’t be cancelled…I hope.

January 2nd Citrus Bowl #17 Tennessee #18 Michigan State
January 2nd ReliaQuest Bowl Florida #20 Minnesota
December 31st Music City Bowl Ole Miss #22 Purdue
December 30th Gator Bowl Arkansas #19 Pittsburgh
December 30th Arizona Bowl Boise State Northern Illinois
December 30th Sun Bowl Louisville Oregon State
December 30th Duke’s Mayo Bowl Kentucky Penn State
December 29th Alamo Bowl #15 Oklahoma #13 UCLA
December 29th Cheez-It Bowl Iowa State Miami
December 29th Pinstripe Bowl Iowa Florida State
December 28th Texas Bowl LSU #21 Texas
December 28th Holiday Bowl Virginia Tech #24 USC
December 28th Liberty Bowl South Carolina #23 Oklahoma State
December 28th Military Bowl Wake Forest #16 UCF
December 27th Guaranteed Rate Bowl Nebraska Kansas State
December 27th Birmingham Bowl Auburn #25 Cincinnati
December 27th First Responder Bowl Colorado State Troy
December 27th Camellia Bowl Coastal Carolina UAB
December 26th Quick Lane Bowl Maryland Miami-OH
December 24th Hawaii Bowl BYU Fresno State
December 23rd Independence Bowl Memphis Army
December 23rd Gasparilla Bowl Boston College Tulsa
December 22nd Armed Forces Bowl TCU UTEP
December 21st New Orleans Bowl #14 Marshall UTSA
December 20th Boca Raton Bowl Appalachian State Florida Atlantic
December 20th Idaho Potato Bowl San Diego State Toledo
December 19th Myrtle Beach Bowl Georgia State Liberty
December 17th Frisco Bowl San Jose State South Alabama
December 17th Las Vegas Bowl Mississippi State Arizona State
December 17th LendingTree Bowl Louisiana Kent State
December 17th LA Bowl Washington Air Force
December 17th New Mexico Bowl Utah State Western Michigan
December 17th Fenway Bowl North Carolina SMU
December 16th Cure Bowl East Carolina UNLV
December 16th Bahamas Bowl WKU Central Michigan

More bowl games!  Honestly, I don’t care nearly as much as I used to.  It’s more football at this point.  Once the 12-team playoff (or whatever it ends up being) comes to fruition, I will be interested to see what happens to some of the lower-level bowl games.  Hey, as long as Canadians can see most of these games on TSN then there’s no real problem.  Let’s look at a few points from that long table of information I just posted:

  • Only two games between ranked teams?  Good lord.  UT-MSU at the Citrus and Oklahoma-UCLA at the Alamo and that’s it.  Those two bowls are used to having fairly big matchups.  It would probably be more of a shock if the Bahamas Bowl had a Top 25 matchup (although it would definitely intrigue me that’s for sure).
  • I’m not bothering with listing bowl tie-ins and or conferences that couldn’t fill their bowl quota or even 5-7 teams that I have in to fill the bowl games that don’t have two teams.
  • Some of the other good matchups after the Citrus and Alamo:
    • Ole Miss-Purdue in Nashville
    • Arkansas-Pitt at the Gator
    • Iowa-Florida State playing in the cold of the Bronx
    • Wake-UCF in the Military Bowl
    • LSU going into Longhorn country (kind of) to play Texas
    • Marshall-UTSA in Nawlins
    • Nebraska-Kansas State in a Big Eight matchup in Tempe
  • The Husker one is very interesting because they have the longest Big Ten bowl drought.  Can you fucking believe it?  I would have bet money that it was Rutgers or…Rutgers.  Nope.  The Huskers went to the Music City Bowl in late 2016 and haven’t gone back to a bowl game since.  Wow.

History states at least one of the CFP semi-final games will not be that good.  I hate to do this to the Tigers but sorry, Bama should win that one easy.  The Buckeyes will have big problems with the Dawgs but in the end, they will punch their ticket to the national title game to lose to the Tide who will be back on top once again.  No real surprises here.

So now that COVID is…well not behind us but it is not nearly as serious as it was, we can really get back to normality. That means that the college football head coaches are getting shorter leashes again, folks! The shitcanning season will be upon us at some point this Fall!

And when I mean short leashes I mean seriously short. Like maybe a foot long. Some athletic directors are now realizing that the college football world is pretty much fully back to normal and they have some time to make up. Some coaches received reprieves in the past two seasons thanks to the pandemic but that leeway is fucking gone now.

Look I don’t want to toot my own horn but I usually do fairly well with this list. So let’s just get right down to it, shall we? If you recall, the order is from most likely to be fired to most likely to keep their job. They are also categorized in a few different sections. Let’s go!

Almost Guaranteed Shitcanning

  1. Geoff Collins (Georgia Tech) – This should be a surprise to absolutely no one.  The experiment to move away from the option to more of a pro-style offense has failed spectacularly in the ATL.  I honestly see no possible improvement here and a possible in-season firing.  Needed to keep his job – Get into the final few weeks of the season with at least a mathematical possibility of going bowling.  Prediction – He’s going to get shitcanned some time in November in the midst of a ten-loss season for the Rambling Wreck.
  2. Karl Dorrell (Colorado) – Can we say that weird 2020 season was an aberration?  I think we can as the Buffaloes are dropping down the ladder once again in the Pac-12 as realignment goes wild everywhere.  Needed to keep his job – Have a shot at bowl eligibility going into the final two games.  Prediction – A whole lot of frustration for Dorrell, the Buffaloes, the other coaches, alumni and current students. And no job for Dorrell…he may end up not coaching the final game of the season.
  3. Neal Brown (West Virginia) – Brown’s first year in Morgantown was considered a success.  Last year’s, not so much.  And with an improving Big XII around them, I see them falling even farther in Brown’s third year when he has most of his recruits in.  Not looking good for a guy who was a big up-and-comer not too long ago.  Needed to keep his job – Not continue the downward slide.  Prediction – I remember going to Wet n’ Wild as a kid. It doesn’t exist anymore. But it had some cool waterslides. That is how ol’ Neal is going to feel this season. He’ll end the season on the unemployment line.
  4. Mike Bloomgren (Rice) – No one is really expecting Rice to be a power player in football.  Saying that, they had to the American Conference next season and I can’t see Bloomgren being the head coach.  Other than a couple of good seasons, he’s done very little in the Houston area and has fallen FAR behind their neighbour.  Needed to keep his job – Something more than what I feel they will do this year.  Prediction – The bloom has come off the rose (ha ha) and he will be looking for a new school to coach at for 2023.
  5. Herm Edwards (Arizona State) – It feels inevitable that, at the very best, Herm will be done at the end of the season.  Their recruiting issues are well known and it may end up being the NCAA coming down hard on ASU (and, eventually, Herm himself).  It won’t help his cause that the Sun Devils won’t be as good as they were last year.  Needed to keep his job – I don’t know if there is anything short of a Pac-12 title that would save his job (and even then).  Prediction – Herm is shown the door before the last game of the season as the powers that be in Tempe decide it’s time to rebuild again.

Probable Shitcanning

  1. Dino Babers (Syracuse) – How long has Dino been on the hot seat?  Everything was looking golden in 2018 for Babers but since then…yeesh.  I’m not saying Syracuse is a destination spot for coaching but you know things are getting tense within the athletic department with this.  Needed to keep his job – The Orange to recapture at least some of that 2018 magic.  Prediction – Dino will be a coordinator somewhere next year.
  2. Scot Loeffler (Bowling Green) – I’m sure there are times where Scotty (Scoty?) would love to be back at any of the schools he used to be at.  This is his first head coaching gig and it has been a rough one to be honest.  Even though Bowling Green isn’t exactly a hotspot in college football, at some point the athletic director will be done with the team not performing.  7-22 isn’t exactly the type of record that keeps a job.  Needed to keep his job – 4 or 5 wins and look competitive inside the MAC.  Prediction – Double-digit losses and a pink slip.
  3. Danny Gonzales (New Mexico) – Speaking of tough places to coach, here are the Lobos looking at potentially another coaching change on the horizon.  Definitely a spot a younger coach in the West would maybe take a shot at.  Beware though: the last time UNM won at least ten games was four decades ago.  Unfortunately between them and NMSU, the state is a dead spot for college football.  Needed to keep his job – Close to bowl eligibility.  Prediction – Three wins and a tough decision to be made from the higher ups.

Possible Shitcanning

  1. Seth Littrell (North Texas) – Littrell hasn’t done bad in Denton.  Five bowls in his six seasons there is pretty darn good for a team in Conference USA.  Problem is he has lost every single one.  It truly does feel like they are kind of stuck in the middle of the conference and that’s getting some people antsy.  Needed to keep his job – At least 5 wins and competing for bowl eligibility near the end of the season.  Prediction – That’s exactly where I have the Mean Green. I think he probably survives the season but the leash will be extremely short going forward.
  2. Bryan Harsin (Auburn) – This was considered a coup when the Tigers plucked him from Boise State.  His first season on the Plains was…rocky to put it mildly.  There was an attempt to get him ousted after last season ended.  Obviously it didn’t work but there are some thinking maybe he just doesn’t fit at Auburn (or the SEC for that matter).  Needed to keep his job – A winning record and better recruiting.  Prediction – I got the Tigers winning 7 to stay out of the basement of the SEC West. That should be enough to save him at least into ‘crootin season. That’s where he needs to improve or otherwise he may not see the 2023 season on the field at Jordan-Hare.
  3. Ken Niumatalolo (Navy) – It is tough putting Ken on this list, I’m not going to lie.  Problem is, Navy has been pretty bad for three of the past four seasons.  That 2019 season where they won 11 games seems like a fluke, almost.  I’m sure it would take a lot to fire Niumatalolo but another season like the previous two and who knows.  Needed to keep his job – At least 6 wins.  Prediction – I have the Middies only winning three so this could be a very interesting offseason in Annapolis.
  4. Terry Bowden (ULM) – I might get some flak for this one.  I know he’s only been in Monroe for a season.  I do think this year the Warhawks are going to be one of the worst teams in the FBS. Maybe there is someone on his staff who will take over for him next year so that ULM brass will feel OK to fire him? I don’t know but this doesn’t seem to be leading anywhere in a much-improved Sun Belt Conference.  Needed to keep his job – Improvement from the previous season.  Prediction – As I said, they won’t be good. I have them predicted at 1-11. I can see this being done relatively quietly in the offseason (Terry’s shitcanning that is).
  5. Rick Stockstill (Middle Tennessee) – Stockstill has been at Middle for what seems like forever.  And it doesn’t feel like anything would happen because of that.  Saying that, the Blue Raiders need to do something since they have been mediocre most of the last few seasons. They also turned down a (possible?) invitation to the MAC so this is their chance to become the best of a not-so-good bunch. Will Rick lead them through that though?  Needed to keep his job – Got to be bowl eligibility really.  Prediction – I got MTSU winning 5 games which will make for some very interesting offseason chatter in Murfreesboro.
  6. Greg Schiano (Rutgers) – This isn’t the Schiano that went 56-33 in his final seven seasons during his first run in Piscataway.  That was in the Big East and Rutgers is…well, they definitely aren’t in a conference like that anymore.  Still, fans were hoping for something a bit more from a guy who runs blitzes during kneel down plays.  Unfortunately, I think this won’t be that year.  Needed to keep his job – Real bowl eligibility, not the 5-7 you are a smart school kind.  Prediction – I have the Scarlet Knights regressing a bit this year. Whether Schiano returns has a lot to do with whether they think they’ve truly bottomed out and if they believe they can get a good coach in.
  7. Jake Spavital (Texas State) – Has anyone ever expected the Bobcats to do anything of significance on the football field? Really, that lack of winning culture could be the one thing that gives Spavital one more season at the helm. Needed to keep his job – 5 wins and some meaningful November football. Prediction – 4 wins and a short leash into 2023.

Doubtful Shitcanning (although it still could happen)

  1. Jeff Scott (USF) – Not a whole lot has gone well for the former Clemson coordinator down in Tampa.  Remember when the Bulls were #2 in the nation?  Not even Pepperidge Farms remembers that I don’t think.  What it does say, though, is that you can win at this school.  Now it’s just a matter of how long the USF athletic department will give Scott to truly turn things around.  Needed to keep his job – Stay out of the American Conference basement.  Prediction – They aren’t going to a bowl game but expect them to win around four games and be quite clear of the bottom rung of the AAC.
  2. Scott Frost (Nebraska) – It has become a difficult job to recruit players to Lincoln.  I think Frost has finally figured it out and the Huskers, at the very least, should be back bowling this season. Now watch them completely tank.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl-eligibility at the very least.  Prediction – No Kool-Aid this time but I have the Huskers winning eight games. Don’t laugh.
  3. David Shaw (Stanford) – I remember when Shaw was getting Stanford to bowl games and contending in the Pac-12 on a consistent basis.  Make no bones about it, he’s still a great head coach.  Give him time and he will have the Cardinal back on top of what will be the Pac-10 going forward.  Needed to keep his job –  Look better than the 2021 season.  Prediction – I have Stanford winning 4 games but the bottom of the Pac-12 North is crowded so an upset or two isn’t out of the realm of possibility for this team. Shaw is safe for another season at the very least.
  4. Mike Norvell (Florida State) – Things are finally looking up in Tallahassee.  For real this time. It would have to get really bad for the Noles this season for Norvell to be let go.  Needed to keep his job – Bowl eligibility at the very least.  Prediction – Eight wins and a new lease on life. Teams won’t have it easy against this team this season.
  5. Tom Allen (Indiana) – I would put Tom farther up this list as Indiana was BAD last year and won’t be a whole lot better this season.  Thing is, his buyout is huge so unless the Hoosiers absolutely have to fire him, he won’t be let go.  Needed to keep his job – Don’t do something illegal or unethical.  Prediction – Other than punching the coach of the opposing team, I can’t see Allen doing anything bad. Yes I only have them winning three games this season but that doesn’t really matter here in the grand scheme of things.

One of these days I have to go back and see how truly successful I have been at this hot seat list. I still think the numbers will back me up.

Now from a normally good section (for me) to a notoriously horrible section (for me). My Heisman ballot is back. And I don’t know if it can be any worse than what I have done for the past few years. But, I always give it my all so here’s another edition of Bossman’s Heisman Trophy Ballot If He Got a Vote (which he most certainly should not):

My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Heisman Ballot

  1. C.J. Stroud, Ohio State – Last year’s ballot was horrifically bad but I did have Stroud in at #4 (and Bryce Young at #5).  So it wasn’t all bad (but mostly it was).  I have the Buckeyes getting to the National Championship and he will be the main reason why. It will be a close race this year, I believe, but Stroud will put up the numbers and get the big victories that put him over the top.
  2. Bryce Young, Alabama – Yes, I do have the Tide winning the national title this year.  It still won’t be enough to not join the list of players who had a shot at pulling an Archie Griffin and came up short.  Unlike everyone else on the list, he won’t make it easy on the other contenders. The only thing holding him back is how many other Heisman candidates this team has. They are loaded.
  3. Caleb Williams, USC – It was a huge coup for Lincoln Riley to convince Williams to follow him from Oklahoma to USC.  Among the contenders, Williams may have the toughest job helping turn around a 4-8 team so quickly.  This is one of the few instances where a team only being so good might end up costing a player during a Heisman campaign.
  4. Will Anderson Jr., Alabama – I believe Anderson is the best defensive player in the country and it’s really not even close.  He’s also one small part of the reason that I think Bryce Young won’t win the Heisman.  He will take some of the votes that would have been thrown Young’s way.  It could work in reverse as well. Anderson could be primed to be the first defensive player in a long time to win the Heisman Trophy but all the good Bama players, including Young, makes it a bit more difficult for him.
  5. D.J. Uiagalelei, Clemson – Should we try this again? Why not.  *clears throat*  Ahem…Oo-ee-un-guh-luh-lay.  Just like last year.  And just like last year I have him #5 in my Heisman rankings.  He will have to show some serious improvement and I am betting he will.  It will help that he will have a better team around him that will be competing fort he College Football Playoff.  I think we will have a good idea what kind of season he will have once September ends.
  6. Tyler Van Dyke, Miami – This guy looked like the real deal down the stretch last season and could have been considered the best ACC player the last few weeks of the regular season.  The Canes will be better but, as per usual, doing better will help a lot. If the Canes can somehow win the ACC title, Van Dyke’s chances might soar.
  7. Dillon Gabriel, Oklahoma – A fantastic quarterback at UCF.  And thanks to TransferPortalMania, he ends up in Norman, replacing Caleb Williams (and, sure, Spencer Rattler).  Being the quarterback for the Sooners is always a pressure situation but the pressure should be a lot less this season which may allow Gabriel to thrive.
  8. Bijan Robinson, Texas – Running backs still get shafted, to an extent, when it comes to Heisman voting.  It takes a phenomenal year for one to win it and you have to pair it with no outstanding quarterbacks.  An uphill battle for sure.  But if there’s one running back who could break through this season, it could be the new king of dijon mustard, Bijan Robinson. He will be the guy who makes the Texas offense go so if they win even 9 games this year, look for him to get a lot of attention from voters.
  9. Jaxon Smith-Njigba, Ohio State – Hey, how about the guy who had a breakout game for the ages at the Rose Bowl?  He will have arguably the best quarterback in the country throwing to him.  As we know, that’s a plus and a minus when it comes to the Heisman.  At the very least, he is the highest rated receiver coming into the season so that counts for something.
  10. Hendon Hooker, Tennessee – This may feel to some like an out-of-nowhere kind of pick.  Hooker showed what he could do running a decent Vols offense.  With Tennessee having a lot more talent on that side of the ball this season, he may have some crazy stats. If Tennessee somehow gets to a New Year’s Six bowl, he will get a ton of hype.

Honourable Mention

  • TreVeyon Henderson, Ohio State
  • Jahmyr Gibbs, Alabama
  • Braelon Allen, Wisconsin
  • Jaxson Dart, Ole Miss
  • Quinn Ewers, Texas
  • Spencer Rattler, South Carolina
  • Grayson McCall, Coastal Carolina
  • Jordan Addison, USC
  • Devin Leary, NC State

I am going to wish the players on this list good luck since there is a chance the winner is nowhere to be found here. Because I am terrible at this.

All the predictions I have are now complete! In about five months or so I will find out how poorly I did.

Next up will be…hold on let me check my notes…yes….YES……YEEEEEES! College football is back! Week Zero! I mean it’s just Week Zero but still….WEEK ZERO! I will have the schedule up at some point early in the week. I’ve already been asked about the specialty packs as it pertains to this coming Saturday. My guess is they won’t show anything since normally they don’t because…who knows but I will chalk it up to some sort of incompetence since what they (Bell and Rogers) tell me makes no sense. I will keep everyone updated. Have a great rest of the weekend everyone!

Hey it’s time for my Heisman ballot…wait, don’t leave!

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Look I will try to do better this time around OK?  Hopefully I get someone in my top, say, five to actually win the damn thing.  I think my predictions closely match other actual experts’ selections so at least if I look like a fool at the end of the season, they will too.  At least that’s what I’m telling myself.  On to the ballot!

My Heisman Ballot of Doom

  1. Sam Darnold, USC – Sam-I-Am seems to be the consensus pick for the Heisman going into the season. I agree with that consensus.  This also means that there is starting to be a bunch of HOT TAKES trickle in as to why Darnold won’t be the Heisman winner.  That’s fine that everyone can have different opinions.  What I balk at is when people make others feel stupid for agreeing that Darnold is the favourite going in.  Because he is.
  2. Baker Mayfield, Oklahoma – He came relatively close to winning the Heisman last year. OK, not really that close but he was in the mix.  He tosses the ball for like eleventy billion yards so at least he will be exciting to watch.  Much of his Heisman campaign will have to do with if the Big XII in general (and the Sooners in particular) can make the College Football Playoff this season with their new fancy conference championship game.
  3. J.T. Barrett, Ohio State – It just feels like Barrett is in his like 8th year of eligibility. It’s about time he gets his due (as long as he can avoid injury).  tOSU is going to be a contender all season which will keep Barrett in the spotlight enough to garner some Heisman attention.
  4. Saquon Barkley, Penn State – It has been a while since a running back has won the Heisman. Barkley seems to the best pick out of a few running backs who have the acumen to do it.  A lot rides on their team’s offense and the only way Barkley gets hurt in this race is if James Franklin decides that Trace McSorley needs to throw the ball more.
  5. Bo Scarbrough, Alabama – As long as his injury (or whatever is ailing him at the moment) doesn’t cut into the season, Scarbrough should be the focal point of the Crimson Tide offense. Just like Barkley, Bo knows he stands a good chance for some Heisman hype as long as Evil Saban doesn’t decide Jalen Hurts needs to toss the ball around more.  Less chance happening here than, say, at Penn State but still a possibility.
  6. Deondre Francois, Florida State – I am still of the belief that the ACC teams (at least the top teams) will beat up on each other and no one will be in the CFP at the end of the season from the conference. That will affect Heisman voting (it almost always does).  This is why I have Francois here and not higher up.  He should be the ACC’s best player this year (even better than Lamar Jackson) but not being on a team contending for a national title will make things more difficult in this race.
  7. Mason Rudolph, Oklahoma State – Now here’s the guy who will get all the stats hype. He will throw for even more than eleventy billion yards and a shit-ton of touchdowns.  For Rudolph to get some true Heisman hype, OSU will probably have to overcome Oklahoma twice: once in Bedlam, and once in the Big XII Championship Game (sponsored by Mountain Dew or some shitty-ass pop like that).
  8. Darius Guice, LSU – LSU feels like a dark horse in general this season and Guice fits the dark horse Heisman candidate profile in particular. With Leonard Fournette gone, I believe many people will overlook Guice despite the fact the also had a great season last year.  He could sneak up many people’s lists of he can look good in major games against Alabama, Auburn, and BYU to start the season.
  9. Jake Browning, Washington – The Fighting Chris Pedersens will be good again. That much we know.  The thing is they now have stiffer competition from Stanford and USC, not to mention a much-improved Oregon and an always-pesky Wazzu.  I can see at least a couple of mediocre games from Browning that would prevent him from ascending to the Heisman throne (or at least getting an all-expenses-paid trip to NYC in December).
  10. Lamar Jackson, Louisville – OK before you get pissed at me for putting Jackson this low, hear me out. This is not (I repeat, NOT) the whole “we can’t have a repeat Heisman winner” type of deal (except for, you know, Archie Griffin who didn’t deserve to win two in the first place but that’s a different kettle of fish).  I can’t see Louisville getting to double digit victories and I don’t think the team itself will have as prolific an offense.  Both of those things will keep Jackson from getting to the absurd heights he got through the first two-plus months of the season.

Honourable Mention

  • Jalen Hurts, Alabama
  • Josh Rosen, UCLA
  • Nick Fitzgerald, Mississippi State
  • Luke Falk, Washington State
  • Quinton Flowers, USF
  • Tanner Mangum, BYU
  • Josh Allen, Wyoming
  • Nick Chubb, Georgia

And there it is.  I am hoping beyond hope that at least one of these eighteen names is announced as the Heisman winner in December.  If not, I might just quit doing this post altogether.

Next up is the FIRST SCHEDULE POST OF THE YEAR!

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That’s right Ric I’m excited as well.  I am still (STILL!) looking for where Bell has hid the specialty pack since it was overwritten by regional CTV channels thanks to DAZN getting Sunday Ticket.  What a mess.  Hey, as long as it’s fixed by Saturday morning, that’s all I care about.  I have put the first two games that I can see (both on CBS Sports Network) on the PVR so the start is in sight.  Once I can get the specialty pack stuff on the PVR I will breathe a sigh of relief and know that we are ready to go for the season.

I still need to do an NFL preview of sorts.  That will come next week as long as something unforeseen doesn’t happen.  Football season is finally upon us.  Let us all rejoice and then watch an unhealthy amount of football for the next four-and-a-half months.

My Heisman Ballot (purely for entertainment purposes since hell might freeze over before I get chosen to select the Heisman winner)

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I say this in jest but remember my picks last year?  Close to terrible.  Didn’t have Jameis CrabLegs on my ballot, no Andre Williams, no Jordan Lynch (although I did give him honourable mention).  Hopefully this year I won’t look like a complete idiot with my pre-season Heisman predictions (although I have made sure to leave poor Braxton Miller out this year).

  1. Marcus Mariota, Oregon – I have the Ducks winning the CFP Deal-i-o this season.  And this is the guy that will lead them there.  On top of that, he has a good shot at being the #1 pick in next year’s NFL draft.  I think this a solid pick as the next Heisman winner.  And finally, he will get one of the first massive showcase games against Michigan State in less than two weeks.  Get yourself out front early and you have a better chance at taking home the Heisman at the end.
  2. Jameis Winston, Florida State – “Jameis, meet Archie.  Archie, meet Jameis.  Now just so you understand Mr. Winston, you are no Mr. Griffin.  Your journey stops at one Heisman.  Now go take a seat.”  The voters, despite the fact they may say otherwise, will penalize Winston because he already won it.  Seems silly but to be honest, is there a way for him to top what he did last season?  Because if he did, then that would be super impressive.
  3. Bryce Petty, Baylor – Heisman voters love QBs who put up massive stats.  There will be a few this year who will do that but none better than Petty and none for a better team than Baylor.  By my calculations (and I’m a former math teacher so you can take this type of calculation to the bank), he should throw about 65 times a game and should easily top 5000, if not flirt with 6000 yards, especially with the early sked the Bears have.
  4. Rakeem Cato, Marshall – Everyone loves the plucky underdog.  Last year, Jordan Lynch finished third in the Heisman voting.  The worst part?  If he had been at a bowl-eligible BCS school, he probably would have won the whole thing.  Marshall has a stupidly easy schedule this season.  And Cato can throw and run.  He could break all sorts of Conference USA records this season and should lead the Herd to the first CFP New Year’s Bowl-a-thon Extravaganza.
  5. Todd Gurley, Georgia – Running backs, over the past decade, haven’t got a lot of Heisman looks, especially as the college game leans towards more passing and higher-octane offenses.  Saying that, Gurley is part of the two-headed running back beast at Georgia (with Keith Marshall) and should put up some monster numbers and looks like he will be playing on Sundays.
  6. Nick Marshall, Auburn – Amazingly enough, this guy will be the best quarterback in the SEC this season.  After a few years of amazing QB play, the level has dropped off.  No offense to Marshall as he is still an awesome QB and looks to prove that last year’s Tigers team wasn’t a fluke.  If he can somehow go crazy in a couple of the more difficult games and has an incredible Iron Bowl, he could be considered a dark horse contender for the title.
  7. Brett Hundley, UCLA – Here is possibly the first player on this list who could be considered a victim of having a better player at the same position in his conference.  Hundley should be lights-out as he continues the football renaissance in Westwood but to have Mariota in the same conference will take a lot of the spotlight off of him.  Sometimes that’s a good thing but when it comes to the Heisman, you have to be at your best when the entire nation is looking right at you to perform.
  8. Leonard Fournette, LSU – This will be a shocking choice to some.  It is now commonplace to put a freshman in the Heisman mix at the start.  Many will go for a quarterback but I am leaning towards Fournette, who will carry a heavy load in Death Valley.  Could he be our next freshman Heisman winner?
  9. Everett Golson, Notre Dame – Another potential surprise pick.  The Irish showed why they so sorely missed Golson last season as they dropped from the BCS title game to the Pinstripe Bowl.  He should help get the team back into a College Football Playoff New Year’s FunTime Bowl this season and I count him as a dark horse Heisman contender if the Irish make doubters out of all of us and somehow run the table.
  10. Myles Jack, UCLA – Defensive players get almost no respect when it comes to the Heisman Trophy.  The offensive players have the flashy plays and crazy stats and the defensive players can’t say the same.  Even Clowney wasn’t close last year.  Could be different for Jack as he plays running back from time to time and is a beast in the front seven for the Bruins.  Also, with no Anthony Barr, he is the man they will all look to.  If they make waves in the Pac-12, don’t be surprised to hear some experts saying this name as a potential Heisman candidate.

Honourable Mention

  • TJ Yeldon, Alabama
  • Melvin Gordon, Wisconsin
  • Taysom Hill, BYU
  • Shane Carden, East Carolina
  • Karlos Williams, Florida State
  • Dak Prescott, Mississippi State
  • Bo Wallace, Ole Miss
  • Trevor Knight, Oklahoma

 

OK we are finally here.  The schedules are (slowly) starting to come out.  TSN has really upped the ante with SEVEN games this coming weekend; two Thursday night and five on Saturday.  They have really done well with more college football coverage (not to mention they are already looking like they are going to hit home runs with tennis and soccer coverage as well).  I am hoping Rogers and Bell get on their horses this year (more than last year at least) and get their specialty pack schedules out soon.  As of right now, only the one game has come up and it’s on Wednesday night (Abilene Christian-Georgia State).  We should see at least 20 games a week on the specialty packs this season.  I am curious as to how they are handling the SEC Network games.  I would be shocked if Texas A&M-South Carolina and Temple-Vanderbilt weren’t on the specialty packs Thursday night but there has still been no indication at this point that they will be.  I hope to find info soon on this.