Yep, the NFL is heading to Brazil next year! Not Rio, which is pictured here but Sao Paulo. The plan is to have a game at Corinthians Arena and it will be the fifth country outside the U.S. to host a regular season game after Canada, England, Mexico and Germany.
So how do I feel about this? Eh, I’m fine with it. It won’t be played in the morning which makes me happy and I’m sure the NFLers that get to go there will be happy to enjoy some Brazilian culture like walking down the beach and things that occur on LiveLeak.
I think the bigger story was after this when it was announced that there would be EIGHT international games in 2025. My guess is, at some point, every team in the league will play one international game a season until the NFL eventually expands there because that’s what Commissioner Goodell wants, dammit!
Until then we are stuck with 32 teams and schedules that still aren’t too large. So let’s get to that not-too-big schedule followed by a few musings:
American Networks
 |  | ||
| Tampa Bay at Green Bay | 1:00 | Minneapolis, Detroit | |
| NY Jets at Miami | 1:00 | Buffalo, Rochester, Watertown, Burlington, Presque Isle | |
| Kansas City at New England | 1:00 | All affiliates (except Rochester & Watertown) | |
| NY Giants at New Orleans | 1:00 | Rochester, Watertown | |
| San Francisco at Arizona | 4:05 | Seattle, Spokane, Cleveland, Boston | |
| Dallas at Buffalo | 4:25 | All affiliates |
Canadian Networks
 |  |  | ||
| NY Jets at Miami | 1:00 | All affiliates | ||
| Tampa Bay at Green Bay | 1:00 | TSN1, TSN4 | ||
| Kansas City at New England | 1:00 | All affiliates | ||
| Chicago at Cleveland | 1:00 | TSN+ | ||
| San Francisco at Arizona | 4:05 | TSN1, TSN4 | ||
| Dallas at Buffalo | 4:25 | All affiliates |
Primetime and Saturday Games!
| LA Chargers at Las Vegas | Thursday, 8:15, Amazon Prime, CTV2, TSN 1/3/+ |
| Minnesota at Cincinnati | Saturday, 1:00, NFL Network, CBS Minneapolis, TSN 1/3 |
| Pittsburgh at Indianapolis | Saturday, 4:30, NFL Network, TSN 1/3 |
| Denver at Detroit | Saturday, 8:15, NFL Network, FOX Detroit, TSN 1/3 |
| Baltimore at Jacksonville | Sunday, 8:15, NBC, CTV, TSN 1/3/4/+ |
| Philadelphia at Seattle | Monday, 8:15, ABC, TSN 1/3/+ |
Non-Brazilian Musings
- Are you ready? Are you ready for some football? A, uh, Saturday afternoon and evening partayyyyyyyyy? Yep, it’s that time of year where the NFL says fuck it, we are taking over more days and if we were allowed we’d have games every day of the damn week. Problem for me is that it’s the start of Bowl Season. Will I watch some of these games? Sure but my focus is almost always on college football (sorry pro football enthusiasts/college football haters).
- Games not being shown in the region of Canada without the use of Sunday Ticket or RedZone:
- Houston at Tennessee
- Atlanta at Carolina
- Washington at LA Rams
- Quite the mixed bag for all the non-Sunday afternoon games. For every Ravens-Jags there’s a Chargers-Raiders. Can’t win em all with six games in those timeslots. Hey, at least we get Kevin Fucking Harlan on the call for the Saturday nighter which is a Mount Everest-sized step up from the earlier play-by-play guys, Chris Rose and Rich Eisen.
- For the first time in a long time, we have an Absolute National Game. The Cowboys and Bills are on every FOX station in the U.S. meaning the same thing in Canada. Not surprising with so many games not on Sunday but in previous years the Niners and Cardinals would have been shown on televisions in about 53 combined city blocks in the cities of San Francisco and Phoenix. Why I’m so glad the true AFC on CBS/NFC on FOX thing has ended. Progress. Should have done it years ago.
Hey let’s get an updated playoff picture since there’s a team ACTUALLY ALREADY IN THE PLAYOFFS (it’s the Niners):
| AFC | NFC |
| #1 Baltimore (10-3) | #1 San Francisco (10-3) (clinched playoff spot) |
| #2 Miami (9-4) | #2 Dallas (10-3) |
| #3 Kansas City (8-5) | #3 Detroit (9-4) |
| #4 Jacksonville (8-5) | #4 Tampa Bay (6-7) |
| Wild Cards: | Wild Cards: |
| #5 Cleveland (8-4) | #5 Philadelphia (10-3) |
| #6 Pittsburgh (7-6) | #6 Minnesota (7-6) |
| #7 Indianapolis/Houston/Denver/Cincinnati/Buffalo (7-6) | #7 Green Bay/LA Rams/Seattle/Atlanta/New Orleans (6-7) |
Holy shit. What an absolute clusterfuck at the bottom of the Wild Card list. In each conference, five teams are tied for the final spot with the first team in each list (the Colts and Packers) holding what I assume are insane tiebreakers over the other four teams. This could end up being one of the best final months of a season in a long time.
And now on to the teams that have been officially eliminated:
- Carolina
- New England
That’s it. Two. With three games to go. Yeah this is nuts. This week that number should go up but maybe by only a couple as you will see in all the clinching scenarios:
Division Title
- San Francisco clinches the NFC West with a win OR an LA Rams loss
Playoff Berth
- Philadelphia clinches with a win OR (a Minnesota loss AND an Atlanta loss AND (an LA Rams loss OR (a San Francisco win AND a Detroit win))) OR (a Minnesota loss AND a Tampa Bay win AND (an LA Rams loss OR (a San Francisco win AND a Detroit win))) OR (a Green Bay loss AND an Atlanta loss AND (an LA Rams loss OR (a San Francisco win AND a Detroit win)))
- Dallas clinches with a win OR (a Tampa Bay loss AND (a Detroit win AND a San Francisco win) OR (a Detroit win AND an LA Rams loss) OR (a Minnesota loss AND a Detroit win) OR (a Minnesota loss AND an LA Rams loss) OR (a Minnesota loss AND a Seattle loss)) OR (an Atlanta loss AND a Green Bay loss AND (a Detroit win OR an LA Rams loss OR a Seattle loss)) OR (a Seattle loss AND (an LA Rams loss) OR (a Minnesota loss AND a NY Giants win AND a New England win AND a Cleveland win AND a Pittsburgh win AND a Tennessee win AND an LA Chargers win))
- Detroit clinches with a win AND (a Seattle loss AND a Green Bay loss) OR (a Seattle loss AND a Minnesota loss) OR (a Seattle win AND a LA Rams loss) OR (an LA Rams loss AND an Atlanta loss AND a Minnesota loss) OR (an LA Rams loss AND a Tampa Bay loss AND a Minnesota loss) OR (an LA Rams loss AND a Green Bay loss AND an Atlanta loss)
- Baltimore clinches with a win AND (a Pittsburgh loss AND a Buffalo loss) OR (a Pittsburgh loss and a Denver loss) OR a (Buffalo loss and a Denver loss) OR (a Cleveland loss AND a a Buffalo loss) OR (a Cleveland loss AND a Denver loss) OR (a Houston loss AND a Buffalo loss) OR (a Houston loss AND a Denver loss)
Elimination
- Arizona is eliminated with a loss OR (an LA Rams win AND a Minnesota win) OR (an LA Rams win AND a Green Bay win) OR (an LA Rams win AND a New Orleans win AND a Chicago win AND an Atlanta win) OR (a Minnesota win AND a Green Bay win AND a New Orleans win AND an Atlanta win AND a Chicago win)
- Washington is eliminated with a loss
- Tennessee is eliminated with a loss AND (a Pittsburgh win) OR (an Indianapolis win) OR (a Cincinnati win) OR (a Denver win AND a Las Vegas win) OR (a Buffalo win AND a Denver win AND a LA Chargers win)
- NY Jets are eliminated with a loss AND (a Buffalo win AND an Indianapolis win) OR (a Buffalo win AND a Pittsburgh win) OR (a Buffalo win AND a Houston win) OR (a Buffalo win AND a Cincinnati win) OR (an Indianapolis win AND a Cincinnati win AND a Houston win) OR (a Cleveland win AND an Indianapolis win AND a Cincinnati win) OR (a Cleveland win AND a Pittsburgh win AND a Houston win)
For fuck’s sake that is ridiculous. And it’s only Week 15. Can you imagine that last Dallas scenario hitting? It would be the ultimate parlay win. A $10 bet would probably make you a millionaire. OK enjoy the games everyone and remember there are Saturday games this week (although the NFL will never, EVER let you forget).
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